Trash Friends - Secret Santa for Askthewah
(Petey and Nate simply talking and being doofs: Petey in italics, actions in bold)
To: @askpetey
From: @askthekeyphantom
“Petey for the last bloody time this isnt a date, you would know if it was there would be pick up lines and actual good food, instead we are here on a couch watching crappy t.v with pizza, i dont count that as a date is more a get together between friends, plus a date is between two people where at least one of them has romantic feelings for the other and i dont think either one of us has that”
*Nate had invited petey round for some simple friendly time, nothing sinful, nothing to nasty just friends as he didnt do that enough honestly but it seems petey is hell bent on calling it a date and making things weird i mean come on nate has standards man, petey is not his type*
“How do I know that isnt what this is huh huh?”
*Nate chuckled and hit Petey jokingly as he took a slice of the pizza god he thought he was so funny didnt he*
“because im better than that and dont romance garbage”
“what about the-”
*Nate cut him off quickly with a scowl*
“I never said i dont do that with garbage just not the romance thing, i got standards for fuck sake”
“Standards…riiiiiight……is that why your sat nearly in nothing eating junk food and watching bad t.v. with someone you call trash”
*petey joked at him lightly hitting his arm with a sly smirk*
“Ok first of all how dare you, second all i have ROMANTIC standards not friendship standards, third this food isnt junk its take-away it cost money therefore not junk, junk doesnt cost money”
“….so you spent money on junk food”
*nate looked a little irritated but it was mainly a joke expression, he wasnt at all annoyed*
“i swear to god you dirty plant i will bury you in the backyard till you grow your way out if you dont shush”
*half an hour passed by and the two had demolished the pizza and simply sat slumped on the couch messy and bored*
“what the hell are we even watching anyway”
“Hell if i know, i just put it on as background noise but i couldnt hear a damn thing over you insisting this was a date…what time is it anyway?”
“i think its some glitz pit stuff by the looks of iiits…koop hugan against…..uum….james “the cobrat” robertson no clue whats going on but hey its noise and better than nothing. Why do you care though, not missing your shows or anything are you?”
*petey started laughing rolling a bit on the couch thinking of this big fool watching some silly soap or drama show*
“no i would just prefer not to be up all night with you”
“what you normally-”
*nate cut him off once more*
“finish that and i wont ever be again”
“fiiiine….but its true and you know it”
“yes i do know it i just dont want you saying it while covered in pizza on my couch”
*Another 15 minutes passes by*
“ya know what fuck it im not wasting the energy to move your fat ass”
*nate got up with a grumble starting to clean things up*
“what are you doing?”
“going to bed, but i aint moving you so you can stay, dont ruin the couch or my t.v or anything else”
“Oh dont worry nate, when you wake up its just all gonna be ruined, couch stained and flipped, table smashed, t.v shattered and stuck on MTV or something your gonna feel so stupid for letting me stay”
“I feel stupid for inviting you in the first place”
“wow nate you sure do know how to hurt a mans feelings”
“i know how to hurt more than that and can show you if you dont shut it”
