I have quite a few thoughts running around my head concerning the upcoming holiday. One, I have mixed feelings; I kinda hate it because it reminds me of bad moods (trying to watch movies while your mother shouts at you to do the dishes) and ignorance (Christianity in general), but I also have sweet memories from Christmases past from my childhood. Two, I extremely dislike Christianity and anything relating to it (NOT anyONE) at the moment, and I really don't feel like opening presents around a nacimiento (dunno what the word is in English) tomorrow morning. Three, I already know what I'm getting from everyone but my NY relatives, so there's really no point. No surprises and smiles and sincere thank yous like in the past. Christmas just loses its magic as you lose interest and faith in your old religion. Four, I'm mad at myself for various reasons. I don't usually get full (like, ever; my stomach is sorta like a black hole), but on the occasions that I do (such as right now), it means I'm actually going to gain weight from what I eat (which I don't usually), which socks ASS. Besides the fact that I'm mad at my non-cooperative digestive system and its inability to consume countless amounts of chocolate, I'm mad at myself for being so salty to everyone. It's not even that I'm intensely angry or miserable; I'm kinda in the middle and it's driving me nuts. Five, I hate not being at home for Christmas Eve. Hate it. And right now I'm stuck in my mom's friend's house, which is right behind ours. It's like my house is mocking me, being so close, yet so far... sigh. Why can't I just stop being a whiny assholes bitch and enjoy the holidays like everyone else???
[This fic has a Sexy Things Warning. This means that there will be sexy things happening between characters. Sometimes it will be very clear what they are doing and how they are doing it. This is, after all, a romance.]
Dark Horse Master List
Chapter 17: 1330 words
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"Explain to me again why I am cuddling you to sleep instead of your very hot boyfriend because I want you to listen to how ridiculous you sound. Maybe this time it will sink in."
Bo-Na frowned at her but it lacked the heat of real irritation. Eun-Sang pulled the blankets up to her nose and tried to look innocent. It didn't work, mostly because she knew how ridiculous she sounded.
Her friend sighed and flopped back on the bed. Bo-Na stared at the ceiling. "You've been in love with him since he got back from his enlistment. I took pictures of you flirting with him at that pool party before he started dating Rachel. He's into you. He stared at you all night during my last birthday. You've had sex already. What could possibly be the problem?"
Bo-Na sighed quietly but didn't argue Eun-Sang's excellent point. "I think if he knew how bad it was, sunbae would take your side. Rachel says..." she hesitated and then barreled on. "Rachel says she never had to deal with Tan. She says sunbae never asked her to associate with him. He--"
"I'm not Rachel. I don't have her...confidence. Tan's afraid of her because she's above him. He's not afraid of me. But..."
"But?"
Eun-Sang squirmed a bit under the weight of that word. She swallowed and wiped at her face. "He doesn't assume the worst. One of the actors gave me his coat today and Hyo-Shin didn't even blink. He didn't..."
"He didn't punish you."
"Yeah." Eun-Sang looked up at the ceiling. "What am I going to do when he doesn't pick me, Bo-Na? He said he'll tell Tan but he just doesn't understand how horrible Tan will get. Tan paid..."
"Tan paid off a weakling who didn't understand you are worth fighting for. It's better you didn't waste any more time with him. Sunbae isn't like that. You know he isn't like that."
But what if he was? She knew how close he and Tan were. Tan always asked about Hyo-Shin in his letters during his enlistment. Tan was vehement that he get to keep Hyo-Shin after their breakup. She could have everyone she wanted but Hyo-Shin was his.
And she screwed up the peace between them when she didn't ask to be reassigned to a different drama that first day they ever worked together. Tan probably thought this was the only drama when in fact they worked together at least once a year. She could've tried to change production companies but...
Lee Hyo-Shin had a way of drawing everyone to him--including her. He had a way of keeping her in the present. Her first (very poorly written) screenplay had been about him. She'd written a single scene about her interview into the broadcasting club. Her college professors rightfully ripped it apart but she still had the final draft printed out with all of her papers.
"I'm scared," she said finally. "We've had sex. It's not like we can go back and be just friends."
"Why would you want to? I bet he's fantastic at sex." Bo-Na rolled onto her side and moved a bit closer so she could give Eun-Sang a hug. "I bet he's scared too. I'm going to tell you a secret."
"You probably shouldn't."
"Leaving Rachel was very hard for him." Eun-Sang already knew that on some level but she didn't interrupt. "His rebound girlfriend was the worst. After they broke up, he stayed with Chan-Young for a few months. Chan-Young says he was very sad all the time. It didn't change until he started working with you. He's only lived alone for a month. He's probably scared to lose you too. I get that Tan is an asshole but...but that doesn't mean you can't be happy with sunbae."
Eun-Sang tried to digest this information. "Do you think he can be happy with Tan's ex-girlfriend?"
"No." Bo-Na hugged her tightly. Her next words brought out some weepies. "I think he can be happy with Cha Eun-Sang."
She just hugged her friend tightly and soon the daily exhaustion took her into sleep. Unfortunately, sometime around midnight, her phone buzzed. Not wanting to wake Bo-Na up, she slipped out of bed and into her bathroom. She seized up when she saw the contact on the screen.
Tan.
Eun-Sang took a deep breath and answered. "It's really late. I'm sure this can wait until morning."
"You have ten days to quit. I deserve one friend to take my side and see you for who you really are." He didn't sound drunk so that was probably a good thing. It didn't stop her hands from shaking.
"He does know who I really am. Tan, I can't quit my job every time Hyo-Shin and I work together. We work for the same industry. The chances that we--"
"I don't care. Ten days."
"I will tell Won." She threw it out there before he could hang up with his ultimatum. Somehow she kept the tears out of her voice. She didn't hold back her words or her anger. "If you push this, I will tell him about everything. I will tell him how you interfered with my degree. I will tell him how you had me followed during your enlistment. I will tell him about what you did to Min-Ki. I will tell him about the night you didn't me let go. I will tell him how you made me give everything back and pay for the rest. I will tell him how you threatened my mother. I will tell him everything, Kim Tan. You don't get my life anymore."
Tan was silent and she could hear him breathing. When he spoke, the phone nearly vibrated with his anger. "You cheated on me. I didn't tell a single person about your infidelity but I still have the pictures."
"That doesn't justify what you did to me." She lost control of her voice and it went shrill at the end. "Just leave me alone. If you interfere with my job at all, I will tell Won."
"Ten days. Then I release the pictures." He hung up on her.
Eun-Sang sank to her knees and tried not to scream. She might have started crying but a text beeped through. She opened it to find Hyo-Shin's address and passcode.
Bo-Na is showing more self-control than I thought possible. I'll be up for the next hour or so. Consider this a hint that after two weeks together, I miss you and it's only been four hours
She bolted to her feet and ran out of the bathroom. Bo-Na stirred and grumped as Eun-Sang began pulling on clothes. "Where are you going?"
"I'm panicking," she said. "You should be happy. I'm about to make a fool of myself with Hyo-Shin. I really hope you're right about him liking me because I think I'm about to make a mess."
Bo-Na sat up and rubbed at her eyes. "What happened? What can't wait until morning?"
"Tan called. He says if I don't quit my job, he'll release the pictures." She shoved her phone into her purse and felt like she was coming apart in tremors.
"You mean the pictures where you are just standing next to another man?" Bo-Na rolled her eyes but got out of bed and grabbed her purse. "You are the only two people who know what those pictures mean. He is making something out of nothing."
Eun-Sang loved Bo-Na with all of her heart. She couldn't even tell Chan-Young what happened but Bo-Na just listened to her cry the night she ran away from Tan. Bo-Na put Eun-Sang back together when she thought she could never be happy again. And right now she was grabbing her keys and growling her displeasure at Tan.
"I will drive you and wait at Chan-Young's while you talk to sunbae." She walked up to Eun-Sang and hugged her. "It will be okay."
Hi friend, saw your criticisms. If you're interested in seeing my apology for those ignorant things from years and years ago, feel free to look up "Tyler Oakley privilege" - not looking for you to accept any apology, just want you to know I put that out there.
I’m honestly confused about how you found this??? Like I didn’t even tag you?? So that mean you sit on your computer doing nothing but searching your name like a conceited fuckwit.
And honestly I’m not really interested in hearing anything you have to say. You are the most misogynist piece of shit I’ve ever met had the misfortune to meet.
I'm going to be a giant asshole today and tomorrow, just so everyone is aware.
Like, I know I'm usually an asshole, but you can expect it to be worse for the next couple of days. Between the inevitable level of suck that will be Glee tonight, the fact that I'm getting sick again, and the fact that I've got family I hate visiting... Yeah.
I'll say again: I don't care if people unfollow me. I don't check, I don't track that in any way. I won't leave you pissy asks going WHY DON'T YOU LIKE ME ANYMORE!!!! or whatever. So please feel free if you want to.
