Can I pls add my two cents on how we break?
OK SO at this point, I think Toji loves mamaguro but has adoration for the idea of her. She was his first, the mother of his kid and also the one who taught him how to love. It was not a surprise when he decided to drop everything to have a second chance with her.
Back to Y/N, she was there to collect his shards, glue them togheter and fix averything mamaguro left behind, selflessly loving Megumi as her own. She was a foundation that held him through thick and thin, making him a better man, I mean, Mamaguro left him because of his life and his jobs, but after Y/N, I have the impression Toji focused on being more family-oriented? Still a criminal and all, but something changed?
And that's an important point. So what if he comes to realize that mamaguro isn't good for him and for Megumi? She hasn't made peace with the fact he hadn't stopped his lifestyle and now is also bitter because feels often compared to Y/N? And everything's gone spiralling, Toji started drowning himself with his job again because the adrenaline helps him to forget the pain and mamaguro starts to get overwhelming, demanding him to drop the job and reassure her that he only loves her. And then, he realizes his life is full of love, but just a sequence of bad choices.
YES!! THISS! ALL OF THIS OH MY GODDFDDD [x]
toji’s wife is the first act of kindness toji ever had. life with her stabilized toji; she, in all sense of the word, was his anchor. so when she came back, toji chases after her. he was offered another chance of life with her, so of course toji takes this chance.
she was his freedom, and [you] were his breath of fresh air.
when she left, toji entered and left relationships as though they are simple games to erase the boredom away. then there’s you.
you loved him as he is, broken pieces and everything. you didn’t try to replace his wife or chain him to you. when he left for weeks- or months-long, you always welcomed him back. you let him run his chaos. you didn’t try to change him.
and that helped him.
he wanted someone to be with even when he’s broken. if his wife was an anchor, you were a tree—steady despite the storms, and growing and branching out throughout the seasons.
and your silent love allowed him to pick up the pieces he’s left with.
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i think when toji’s wife returns, toji fully turned over. he is always terrified that she’d leave again so he holds back with his work. it’s the first thing they established when they were rebuilding their family.
they set ground rules to make their relationship work and to ensure that megumi will never go through a parent’s absence ever again.
in return to his cutting back of work hours, she promises that she will be more understanding about his situation. toji told her, in a roundabout way, that work helps him crush his haunting past and it gives him a semblance of control. he is honest with her now, and tells her that domesticity is nice but it cannot quell the itch in his hands.
she will not understand fully, but she will learn to trust toji. their relationship will heal and mend—they deserve this as much as the reader deserves her happy ending.
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also this is just following your last cent!
if the situation’s ever lead to that (wherein they don’t see eye-to-eye again and it causes their relationship to be strained) i think it won’t make toji regret leaving you because he really wants to be with his wife.
what i think he’d do is work around what’s going on. he learned that from you, anyways.
he’d remember how you’ve made your relationship work around his schedule and his sporadic disappearances, and how you coped. he’d remember how he adjusted for you, and he’s try to do the same thing with their relationship.
and it’d work.
she would feel jealous every now and then, especially as she is reminded of how beautiful your relationship was with both her husband and her son, but toji would do his best to banish those insecurities.
toji’s relationship with you helped him grow into a better man. he is thankful for you helping him back up, but he will not regret.
i think it is kindness to allow toji and his wife their rerun of happiness as you follow yours with satoru.
