#autism paaarents

[ayman-eckford]

Yesterday I finally got an Autistic diagnosis.

Was it a relief?

Yeah, definitely! Not because I don’t know that I’m Autistic, but because I wanted an official diagnosis for 7 long years. At first to find out who I am, after that to prove to my parents and people around me that I’m right.

In Russia and Ukraine it is extremely difficult (and expensive) for a person to get an official Autistic diagnosis. Especially for an adult person because I think nearly 90% of specialists believe that Autism in adulthood is Schizophrenia.

And some of the rest believe that Autism is an intellectual disability or means that a person couldn’t speak.

So I have kind of oral confirmation of the diagnosis from different specialists in post-USSR, and they don’t have opportunities or don’t believe that they could write some papers. All of them, as far as I know, have this kind of Western education/qualification courses.

Well, this is what you need to know about “free” USSR medicine and education!

But now I would have it. My papers. My diagnosis. My Autistic status/case was so obvious for specialists that the process took less time than it usually takes.

And what I want to say now to all this trolls and “Autism paaaarents” who are telling everyone that I’m faking?

And who pushed every Autistic person to take an official diagnosis?

Actually, nothing. Yeah, this diagnosis is metter for me because I badly wanted to have it long ago and because it could help in some legal procedures. And because I want to be officially disabled - not because of money, but because I don’t want to feel hypocritical by telling other people that being disabled is normal stuff but don’t get a disability status for myself.

But does diagnosis help me to understand who I am? Does it give me more rights to speak about my experience?

No, I don’t need neurotypical approval to understand who I am, or speaking about my experience. And other Autistic people help me more than doctors.

Also now, when I have all papers, I wouldn’t ever speak like it means more than self-diagnosis or push other people to diagnose themselves. I know that this is a privilege that I have only now, and many folks still don't have it. And I wouldn’t use this privilege against my Autistic folks.

(Selfi: Me (and Abu Hamza and Ver.B.A. Is near) in a gray coat)

[ayman-eckford]

About the «dispute» that I have heard hundreds of times in a different languages.

Autistic activists: Autism is not a disease! It’s a part of who we are!

“Autism” paaaarents: So, you think that Autism is a superhuman gift, and not a disability?

Autistic activists: No! Autism IS disability because of our society’s way of functioning! So we just say that we don’t need a cure, we need an accommodation!

“Autism” paaaarents: But if autism is not a disease, how can it be a disability?

Damn it! Dear “autism” paaaarents.

Here’s the deal!

Maybe before you start talking about disability again, you will at least read what a disability (and social model of disability) is?

[ayman-eckford]

TW: family abuse

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My parents made me almost incapacitated.

They brainwash me and help me to believe that my OCD has something to do with a devil. I didn’t have any mental support, or treatment. OCD became so strong that I couldn’t read, watch TV, walk, pass and take exams without praying.

Moreover, my parents abused me and this is the case DID (or maybe OSDD1B) and PTSD in my case.

And they made me feel like I’m little and silly, like I couldn’t do anything. They made our Littles to be afraid of cooking and cleaning and other home stuff. So every time when I was doing something on the kitchen they said: “no one whould want to live with you”

They forced me to go to kindergarten without any needs for it so I have a strong selective mutism after. And after that they blamed me for being bullied and said that no one would like to be my friend.

So they made everything to keep me in a dependent relationship with them.

And after that someone believed that “families are safe places for kids and parents always know how better for their kids and prepared them for independent life”?

Well, maybe SOME families could be good. It’s difficult to be a good parent in an abusive ageistic culture but whatever.

My parents seem to have made something just to stop me from being independent.

And they are not the only parents like that.

So, please, stop idealizing families!

-Ayman