#awhn

[cherrychapstick54]

Amnesia Was Her Name

Series

Chapter One: Goat Boy

- Tommy wakes up with a throbbing pain in his head and a lack of memory of what caused it. Luckily, a friend is there to help. -

Chapter Two: Crater

- Helping Tubbo clean up L’manhole is easier said than done, especially when you keep forgetting shit. -

Chapter Three: Tomato Farm 🔪

- Tommy decides to pick up a new hobby, but finds himself washed away in the process. -

Chapter Four: A Second Chance 🔪

- Tommy wakes up on a frozen beach after… shit, he can’t remember. Oh well, maybe this stranger who appears to know him will help! -

Chapter Five: Meetings

- Tommy’s body is stuck in the realm of the gods and XD is NOT happy about it. -

Chapter Six: North 🔪

- Tommy finally goes home, but meets someone new along the way. She’s nice and all, but…she’s also kinda a bitch… -

Chapter Seven: How to Sex—Totally Not a Suspicious Name

- Tommy has the great idea of making a diary to help with his memory! Shenanigans ensue. -

Chapter Eight: How to Sex

- Tommy’s first personal note to himself. -

Chapter Nine: A (Platonic) Marriage

- Tommy doesn’t want to do anything, but Amnesia won’t let him sulk. -

Chapter Ten: How to Sex: Entry #2

- Tommy writes in an attempt to cope with his problems. -

Chapter 11: Pay Back 🔪

- Tommy wakes up to a brutal beating; it’s a shame what’s given up to make it stop. -

Chapter 12: How to Sex: Where Did He Go?

- Drista gets curious and writes her own entry in Tommy’s diary. -

Chapter 13: Ghosting 🔪

- Dream teaches Tommy a lesson or two, including the ground rules for his new home. -

Chapter 14: Hook, Line, Sinker 🔪

- Tommy struggles to feel peaceful despite the calm, and Drista argues with her brother until they both come to an agreement. -

Chapter 15: Prey Must Adapt If It Wants To Survive A Predator

- Maybe exile isn’t all that bad, and who the hell is that? -

Chapter 16: Christmas Brings Everyone Together

- A lot of things can happen at Christmas. For Tommy, he was scared of what could happen. Luckily, Phil is there to help him. Only issue, who the hell is Phil?? -

Chapter 17: How to Sex: Entry #4?

- Tommy doesn’t know what to think about his old friend, but he does know that he misses Amnesia. -

Chapter 18: Happy Christmas?

- Phil reminisces on what used to be, and hopes for what could be. -

Chapter 19: Buenas Noches Prostituta

- The struggles of having to keep control of a stray man who’s just trying to get back home to Tijuana. -

Chapter 20: How to Sex

- Maybe writing will help Tommy? -

Chapter 21: We Are All Just Prisoners Here Of Our Own Device 🔪

- Tommy can’t remember what the holiday is called, but it’s the season of mercy! No, wait…season of giving! That’s what it is. -

Chapter 22: Living It Up At The Hotel California 🔪

- Tommy struggles to realize what’s real and not real. Luckily, Dream is there to help! -

Chapter 23: Such a Lovely Place, Such a Lovely Face 🔪

- Hallucinations are a bitch. -

Chapter 24: How to Sex

Chapter 25: The Edge 🔪

- Tommy tries to find a solution to his issues, and succeeds. -

Chapter 26 (Alternate Ending): You Can Check Out Anytime You’d Like, But You Can Never Leave 🔪

- Alternate ending from chapter 25. -

Epilogue (Alternate Ending pt.2): Man Am I The Greatest 🔪

- Epilogue for chapter 26. -

- Divider credits to @issysh3ll -

[itsaplaceyouveseenbefore]

refs for all of my lemon demon ocs currently! plus food au versions bc thats nice

(from top to bottom, left to right)

amnesia was her name (alan), this hyper world (will), vow of silence (sal)

atomic copper claw (ace), ode to crayola (oli), the too much song (thelma)

the afternoon (june), word dissassociation (wayne), being a rock star (unnamed)

[cherrychapstick54]

Amnesia Was Her Name

Chapter 25: The Edge

Title from “Amnesia Was Her Name” by Lemon Demon

Synopsis: Tommy tries to find a solution to his issues, and succeeds.

This chapter was written by @genderlessbleach and edited by me.

Trigger warnings: Suicide and hinted abuse.

Tommy found himself awake, watching as the rain poured down and leaked into his shelter. What did he do to deserve all of this? He had done nothing but respect the masked man and tried everything in his power to right his wrongs, he didn’t want to suffer anymore. The blonde pushed himself out of his shelter letting himself get soaked in the pouring rain, no one had cared to visit him, not even Amnesia, she was so kind to him and yet she didn’t care to show when the green man hurt him. A small sigh left the brits mouth as a small sense of disappointment washed over him from the lack of the preppy girl. Even his own hopes seemed to vanish as he felt the last few memories of her fall to the back of his mind, never to be thought of again.

Tommy gathered all of his building blocks and headed towards an open spot within the bounds the green man had set. The blonde slowly built himself up a tower block by block, careful not to slip off the tower too early. Once high enough Tommy placed his belongings carefully at the top.

“Amnesia, if that was her name, I’ll miss you.” Tommy steps off the tower, falling to his death, lady death’s arms wrap around him holding him close after he had hit the ground. Death was dark and empty but warm, she held him safe within her arms, yet another son to hold, but not another left to walk the land of the living. Tommy was finally safe, Tommy was finally free, he could finally rest.

- Divider credits to @issysh3ll -

[cherrychapstick54]

Amnesia Was Her Name

Chapter One: Goat Boy

Title from “Amnesia Was Her Name” by Lemon Demon

Synopsis: Tommy wakes up with a throbbing pain in his head and a lack of memory of what caused it. Luckily, a friend is there to help.

Beforehand: All characters in this series are meant to be 100% fictional. These are not the real people who play the characters, and I do not support William Gold or any of the Dream Team. This story was written by me and @genderlessbleach when I started out as an editor. Later in the story I took over writing to help Bleach with the stress, but until stated otherwise, this was a collaborative effort.

Tommy had woken up, first confused, where was he? A mud hole or hut, possibly a house, a poorly made house then, the floor was hard and soft, and the damn place was cold and wet. He sat himself up, why was he here? His body hurt like a bitch and his head was throbbing, god he couldn’t even remember who he was, that’s not a good thing he’s pretty fucking sure. Pushing himself off the ground with a groan, his bones and joints cracking as he does, fucking hell his clothes were muddy, and was that blood?! Fuck, it is blood.

Tommy doesnt fucking know what to do, so naturally, he screeches, “WHAT THE FUCK!” Why is there so much blood! Is it his?! “Oh god oh god I’m going to die!” The brit was maybe a touch dramatic but he was covered in blood, of course he was going to be fucking dramatic! You don’t just wake up covered in blood one fucking day, that is not fucking normal, let alone something that happens on your average day! He needed to get his mind off of this bullshit and fast.

The blonde boy searched around the dirt hut looking for some clean clothes, he needed to clean himself up, his current clothes were fucking gross. After digging around some chests and stripping himself of his shirt he found some new clothes, granted they happened to be just the same shirt and pants, it wasn’t that bad, the shirt was cool looking and he needed to clean up, so it was a win to the brit. He tried to brush off the grime on his body with just his hands, quickly realizing he needed water in order to do so.

“Fucking hell,” he looked around for a bucket of water and cloth, silently thanking the gods when he found some. The teen cleaned himself off, finally able to put some fresh clothes on.

“Seems like it is time for little ol’ me to get outside.'' He spoke to himself, stretching out only to feel pain run through his body, “ow ow ow oh fuckkkkk-” he stops rubbing over the painful spots, “not doin’ that shit again.” He heads out of the house, feeling the pain run through his body. God, leaving his house wasn’t a good idea, he was immediately stopped by some fuckin’ short ass goat man, how dare this tiny horned dipshit stop him!

“Hey Tommy! Are you alright, cause like last night wasn’t pretty, Wilburs bombing was pretty heavy. I had to drag your poor knocked out ass home after you got knocked out by the explosion! I guess it’s weird for me to ask if you’re alright, you got real fucked up out there. and,,” The goat boy continues talking while Tommy, that’s his name right? That’s what this goat boy said, but is he even trustworthy?

“What are you even saying? Who even are you?” He looked down at the horned boy, “Why are you speaking to me like you know me?” Trying to actually tell the boy about his confusion didn’t seem to work, as all he got in return was a confused stare.

“Tommy how hard did you hit your head man? You’re acting all weird! It’s me Tubbo, your best friend?? Bee boy, your spy for pogtopia, hello man, do you need some ice for your head?” What the boy, or Tubbo said all sounds familiar, but he can’t remember it, like none at all. Weird, it’s probably just nothing though, cause maybe its just his brain forgetting things ‘cause of the bombs and it’ll all come back to him.

“Agh, sorry Tubs,” what- where did Tubs come from? Whatever, “My head still hurts from the bombs, it's hard to think clearly, ya know, blunt force trauma.” He chuckles, hopefully he’s not completely lying. He smiles at the goat boy... Tubbo, hoping that what he said is all true, because he’d like to know what the fuck is happening. Also, thank the gods Tubbo seemed to believe what he said.

“Alright Tom, just stop being all sketchy, okay? I'm going to see if the hole is safe to explore yet. I’ll talk to you later, yeah?” The goat boy then went off towards where Tommy could only assume the bomb site was. Tommy sighed at the leaving of the smaller boy's presence, what a strange little man.

“What the hell is going on?” Tommy questions himself quietly, “Why can’t I just fucking remember everything?!” Nearly screaming the last bit, he heads down the oak pathway, lost in his thoughts about everything.

“Stupid fucking bombs messing up my brain…” The tall boy grumbles, kicking rocks off of the prime path, just trying to get his emotions out any way he can. This all sucks, he just wants to know what’s going on! He groans, sitting down on the edge of the path with an angry thump.

“Why did it have to be me of all god damn people!” He huffs, looking out at the structures that are visible to him from the path, his jaw is clenched as he gazes out at the land.

- Divider credits to @issysh3ll -

[cherrychapstick54]

Amnesia Was Her Name

Chapter Seven: How to Sex—Totally Not a Suspicious Name

Title from “Amnesia Was Her Name” by Lemon Demon

Synopsis: Tommy has the great idea of making a diary to help with his memory! Shenanigans ensue.

This chapter was written by @genderlessbleach and edited by me.

Tommy looks at the book he just made. Thinking to himself, he tries to figure out what would be the least suspicious name for a memory book. Then it comes to him: How to Sex. No one will think it’s a diary, they’d just think it is one of the stupid things Tommy writes as a joke.

A sudden scream from that girl Amnesia makes Tommy jump, losing his train of thought. “TOMMY, you can’t just leave like that man. We’re here to have fun!” Tommy turns to look at her, noticing the tall dude from earlier is standing behind her. “We’re also bringing Ranboo with us cause they seem pretty chill!” Amnesia flashes him a smile from under her mask. Ranboo just shakes from the acknowledgement, which the blond finds a bit comedic.

“Alright, fine. Just give me a minute, bitch!” Tommy quickly writes down ‘How to Sex’ on the cover of his notebook before tossing it down on his bed. “Where are we goin’ and don’t you dare fucking fly me into the clouds again, dickhead!” Drista only laughs at the comment.

“I won’t! I promise!” Amnesia keeps laughing, appearing to have a complete mood swing from that morning; giving tough love and harsh slaps with reality to lighthearted and energetic. To be completely honest, Tommy much prefers this attitude over the one from earlier that day. He feels as if he can actually enjoy her presence and have fun with her despite their rocky start.

The group of teens exit Tommy’s home to look for a bit of chaos to create. With a quick movement, Drista scoops up the other two and flies them up, the action causing Ranboo to hold onto her with all his might to not be dropped. Tommy on the other hand is scoping out where a fun place to blow shit up would be.

Amnesia speaks to the taller, “What if we blew up that ugly ass hobbit hole over there?”

“I think it’s kinda cute.”

“I think it belongs to my brother's mushroom boyfriend, so we should blow it up.” The bluntness of it all causes the group of teens to burst out laughing. They’re going to have fun–Tommy can finally have fun. “So first things first.” Drista drops the two mortals down in front of the hobbit hole. “You two need some fire!” She drops down some flint and steel to the two boys.

Tommy cackles from the power he suddenly has, “YEAHHHHHH TIME TO BURN SOME SHIT DOWN, BOYS!” Amnesia laughs with him while Ranboo just stands confused and slightly concerned. Tommy pulls the taller into the hobbit hole, raiding the house for any good items while Amnesia places TNT outside of the house. The dual tone boy, though hesitant at first, seems to get into it soon enough, laughing and messing around with Tommy. With Ranboo taking the first step to light the fire, the duo quickly set the house ablaze.

Drista shouts a warning to the two inside, “RUN! SHE’S ABOUT TO BLOW!” The duo inside come sprinting out of the house, adrenaline running through their blood and excitement radiating off of them. The three find themselves in a fit of laughter as the TNT can be heard going off behind them.

In the moment Tommy feels happiness, and he feels safe. Maybe he doesn’t need his real family; this is enough for him. Finally, a wash of peace runs over Tommy’s body and he falls to the ground with a smile, Drista and Ranboo quick to follow his actions. The group of teens lay laughing in a pile on the ground, moon rising in the distance. Nothing can replace the feeling. Tommy feels at home. As the laughter dies down, Tommy feels an arm wrap around him. It’s Amnesia’s. She scoops the two up and flies them upwards into the air. Unlike the past times, Tommy stays quiet, seeming to relax into the chaos, while Ranboo on the other hand is screaming from the suddenness of the whole situation.

Tommy finds himself laughing with Amnesia, resting his head on her shoulder, laughing quietly instead of his usual obnoxious laugh. Drista flies the two taller boys around, finding a simple flower field for the three of them to relax in after the chaos that they had created. Drista sets the two down and pulls a blanket out of her bag, laying it out on the ground for the three to sit on.

The moment is simple–peaceful some would say. The three teens lay out under the moon in a field of flowers, a cool breeze washing over their bodies as they speak to one another in a hushed tone. Tommy can’t have asked for anything more at the moment. He has everything he can ever need.

With the moon reaching higher in the night sky, Tommy feels himself dozing off. His arms coil around Ranboo’s body, bringing the taller closer for warmth, while Amnesia floats idly above them, whispering facts about the stars to Ranboo.

Ranboo places his hand in Tommy’s mess of hair, petting him subconsciously. The devil horned boy isn’t one to regularly fall into a scene like this, but it feels more than natural to Ranboo; It felt right. The taller hums softly as they listen to Drista’s facts about the stars–all of it sounds strange but who is he to correct a goddess. Drista seems to speak fondly of the stars, calling them her home. She tells Ranboo that each star is a different reality–each similar but never the same. She tells him the further you look, the more changes you can find.

Drista slowly finds herself getting more and more attached to the mortals–the way Ranboo just listens to her peacefully and how Tommy can match her chaotic energy to a T. It’s hard for her to not get attached to them. She simply wants to help out her fellow goddess but now she’s just as fond of them as Mumza is. A sigh escapes her mouth. It’s all so perfect, maybe too perfect.

It’s not perfect at all, she reminds herself. The two mortals she finds herself attached to have memory loss. They won’t remember her if she doesn’t stay close to them. The mortals aren’t perfect and neither is she, but they make her happy, and that’s all that matters.

- Divider credits to @issysh3ll -

[cherrychapstick54]

Amnesia Was Her Name

Chapter Two: Crater

Title from “Amnesia Was Her Name” by Lemon Demon

Synopsis: Helping Tubbo clean up L’manhole is easier said than done, especially when you keep forgetting shit.

This chapter was written by @genderlessbleach and edited by me.

Trigger warnings: Panic attack, derealization, dissociation, and self harm

Tommy looked out over the crater that was in the ground, the smell of smoke and blood still fresh in the air. Why did this place seem so familiar to him? The goat boy, Tub or something said he was knocked out by the explosion that made this hole, but why did it feel like he knew this place from more than just that? He stared into the large crater in the ground, his heart felt heavy looking at it, this place felt like it was home to him at one point, but the mud hut seemed to be his real home, all of his stuff was there, so he shouldn’t feel this way over some crater made by some maniac.

“Hey Tom! Are you here to help?” A voice had called from behind him, causing him to turn and find the goat boy from earlier.

“What? No, I’m just looking at the hole.” The taller boy kicked some of the ash on the ground, “So this is what knocked me out, huh.” He felt a tinge of sadness from the scene while talking about such. He really shouldn’t feel that way, he doesn’t even know what this place is.

“I was doin’ that earlier,” the horned boy sits at the edge of the hole, “it’s hard to look at this place we fought for just now a pit of ash and blood.” The goat boy sighs, “I really am just the president of a crater.” Wait, this little goat boy is the president? How the hell did that happen?

“You’re the president of a hole?” Tommy sits next to him, looking out at it.

“Yes, Tom you literally elected me to be the president,” he gives the blonde a shove, “you really hit your head hard, huh?”

“Aye, I remember!” He defends himself “I just didn’t mean to say it like that!”

“Okay, okay, sure I believe you,” The smaller leans onto Tommy, causing him to flinch, “but, are you sure man, you seem off, it’s probably just your head though, right?” Tommy just nods, staying abnormally quiet despite his normal chipper and loud self. Tubbo looks up at the blonde, not really sure if he should be concerned or not about all of this.

“Wanna help me flood this place? I think it’ll give L’manburg a new start, ya know?” The goat boy speaks, pushing himself up off of the ground. Tommy looks up at him, getting up and dusting himself off.

“Yeah sure, why not?” The lack of enthusiasm caused the goat boy to just stare at the taller.

“What the fuck is up with you man?”

“What do you mean big man?” The taller seems confused.

Tubbo just stares at Tommy for a second, “You know what it's nothing, lets just flood this bitch!”

The duo then go onto flood the crater, hoping to give this place new life from doing such. The whole process seems odd from Tubbo’s point of view, Tommy seeming rather quiet, only saying a few things that are even off from his usual self, he was even asking how he could make it easier for the both of them. That shit never happens, usually Tommy picks the hard way, it makes him who he is, it’s almost like his whole personality got dropped for a new and more confused devil boy.

“Okay, Tom, is something up, like for real, you’re wayyy too quiet while we’re doing this.” The goat boy expresses his concern just to get a confused look from the devil boy.

“Nothing happened man! I just am still feeling funky from the whole, I hit my head thing dude!” Tommy covers up his quietness with the half truth.

“Right, sorry Tommy, it’s just weird when you’re all quiet n’ stuff, I’m used to you screaming at me all the time man.”

“Ah, it’s fine dude.” Tommy gives the goat boy a small smile before getting his ass back to work.

-timeset sunset-

The sun was setting over the L’manlake, causing the two teens to have to stop their work, Tommy groans, stretching out, “Ah fuck man, we better head to bed, I don’t have any armor and the mobs are gonna come out.”

“But, now hear me out, it would be funny-” The goat boy’s suggestion was quickly shut down with a laugh from the blonde.

“I mean it would, but we’d get so hurt.”

“Alright, alright, I’ll see you tomorrow Tom, don’t get hurt by the gay mobs!” The duo then set off to their homes for the night.

As soon as the loud brit entered his dirt hut, a wave of anxiety fell over him; he still has no clue who he really is. Is he even real? None of this felt real, he felt like he was floating outside of his own head, trying desperately to remember who the hell he was in this damn world. His breathing got faster, was he real? He gripped his arms, falling down onto the floor, there is no way he could be right now, it doesn’t feel real at all, is he dreaming? He can’t tell anymore, tears flood his eyes as he desperately tries to breathe. The air seemed to escape his lungs, suffocating him. He folded himself over scratching at his arms, trying to feel real so desperately, yet he couldn’t. The brit cried out for help, but it was too quiet to hear, even for himself. He felt like he was dying, at least he was feeling something, but in that moment he started to hear his sobs fill the room. He sounded so weak, so fragile, why couldn’t he just toughen up a little, it wasn’t even that bad, was it? His nails dug deep into his skin, small drops of blood forming from it. Small pleas for help filled the hut until the lack of oxygen caused him to fall limp, passing out from exhaustion and lack of oxygen. The boy lay on the floor for the rest of the night, his body finally able to rest.

- Divider credits to @issysh3ll -

[cherrychapstick54]

Amnesia Was Her Name

Chapter 16: Christmas Brings Everyone Together

Title from “Amnesia Was Her Name” by Lemon Demon

Synopsis: A lot of things can happen at Christmas. For Tommy, he was scared of what could happen. Luckily, Phil is there to help him. Only issue, who the hell is Phil??

This chapter was written by me.

Tommy looks at him and feels like he’s at home, but he has no idea who the man standing in front of him is. He feels very familial, but Tommy is unsure of his family. He’s forgotten so much, it’s hard to trust anything from his past.

“How are you doing, mate?” The man has a cheerful voice and a bright smile, clearly knowing who Tommy is.

“Who are you?”

“I’m Phil! Don’t you remember me?” His smile doesn’t falter, despite the strange question from Tommy.

“I have no idea who you are. Actually, I don’t really know who anyone is nowadays. Heh.” Tommy rubs the back of his head sheepishly, he’s never been so casual about his memory loss with someone before, but he feels that he can trust this Phil guy.

“Funny as always, mate!” Phil plays Tommy’s weird words off, thinking they’re only a joke.

Tommy feels awkward. The only person to visit him in exile has been Dream, who’s to say that Phil isn’t exactly like him? Still, Tommy takes a chance, the only thought in his head being it can’t possibly get worse.

“So, why are you here?” He has no idea why anyone would visit him, much less a stranger who he doesn’t even remember.

“It’s almost Christmas, Tommy! I couldn’t let you celebrate alone.”

“Christmas? But, doesn’t it have to be snowing in order for it to count?” Apparently Tommy’s memory of Christmas hasn’t been lost yet.

“It’s going to snow in a couple days, mate. That’s why I came early, to help you prepare! Now why don’t you go find a tree you like, and I’ll chop it down for you.”

“A tree I like…okay.” He’s only known this man for ten seconds and already he’s being ordered around. Tommy doesn’t enjoy it, but he supposes that it’s better than getting a beating.

- timeset noon -

“Ay, Phil! I found it!” Tommy’s smile shines brightly as he poses proudly.

Phil feels dumbfounded staring at the puny tree. It hardly had any green on it, being made up of mostly twigs and branches, but Tommy seemed to love it all the same.

“Well then, let’s get it back to camp. Sound good, mate?”

Tommy was shocked with how willing Phil was to celebrate Christmas with him, much less provide for everything needed. He was…happy. “Y-Yeah, sounds perfect.”

- Divider credits to @issysh3ll -

[cherrychapstick54]

Amnesia Was Her Name

Chapter Ten: How to Sex - Entry #2

Title from “Amnesia Was Her Name” by Lemon Demon

Synopsis: Tommy writes in an attempt to cope with his problems.

This chapter was written by @genderlessbleach and edited by me.

Entry #2

I am Tommy and I might have memory loss. I’m trying to remember by writing, but I’m not sure if it's working. I don’t think it is.

I met a girl, Amnesia was her name, and today we claimed to be platonically married. She’s quite bitchy but at least I have a friend. It's funny though cause I think I’m in love with our friendship. In love with the idea of having someone care. It's fun to feel cared for. To feel safe. I met two other people today, I can’t remember their names but I think one was a goat boy and his boyfriend or something was tall and weird looking. Amnesia made me do shit with her today cause I didnt wanna but whatever. She can be a bitch i guess. Id like it more if she left me alone some days though. I just want to sleep all day some days but I can’t control her, its annoying that i cant tho. Im just trying to get by in this hell hole.

-Tommy :/

- Divider credits to @issysh3ll -