#baaahhh

[dedeuteros]

Fun things to do!!:

Adhd meltdown while driving

[childofthekindlywests]

It’s been a really long time since I posted an update (after several months of near-daily posts about job anxiety., begging for good vibes and prayers...). It seemed that nothing was working and I got pretty withdrawn for a while. I had a pretty severe job dry spell and was just scared and sad and anxious and couldn’t be bothered to keep posting about bad news or no news on tumblr and also really just couldn’t be bothered to even shower or get out of bed.

At any rate, I’ve kind of pulled myself together, sorted out my thoughts and feelings, and finally have a lot of good news. Still nothing ideal, but good news is good news.

I went to a meeting at the nonprofit that I interned at and did my thesis research for this year about a month ago now. They were going to hire me part time to do some pretty useless work for very few hours because they like me and knew I just desperately needed some form of income, even if they couldn’t offer me something substantive. Anyway, showed up to the meeting and they were like SURPRISE we want to hire you to work on a new research project! I wanted to cry. So I am no working on a project assessing the child welfare and juvenile justice needs of youth in military families. That work is only 30 hours a week, but they think they are going to get funding for another project this month that they’d like me to work on, and that would put me at full time. In the meantime, they gave me a raise and FULL BENEFITS even though I am part time. It’s amazing. I love my new desk and I love it there and I hope they keep me.

In the meantime, the University of Chicago also decided to keep me on their research project! I am working about 20-30 hours-ish a week with them still and they hired me as a permanent employee with the uni. It’s kind of a lot on top of the hours at the nonprofit, but the project is awesome, I am learning SO MUCH and getting connected to some really important social policy research folks and it looks great on a PhD app resume. And, I need the hours and the paycheck, so I really, really appreciate it. I told them I’d stay involved with the project as long as they need me.

So, I am surviving. Almost feeling like I’m thriving, even. I got my first paycheck from Chicago this week (they owed me my pay all the way back to APRIL and I have had NO other income since the first week of June, but now that I am an official employee they will pay me every two weeks) and paid rent and then cried at the grocery store. Things were pretty hard money-wise for the last few weeks. So, I bought bread and laundry detergent and eggs and stuff to make danishes and I just cried. I feel like I might actually make it, like everything really might just be okay. I can buy some goddamn food. The crying was necessary.

I have had/will have 3 job interviews recently - one last week in Olympia and two tomorrow, one in Tacoma and one on the phone for a job in New Hampshire that my advisor told me to apply for. I want to stay here, honestly. I won’t make a ton at the nonprofit, but I am happy and it’s work I really care about and I finally have FRIENDS here. But I don’t want to put all my eggs in one basket so I have to keep this up. I retake the GRE in September and I am meeting with my advisor next week to talk about whether I should apply this year for PhDs or wait. So things are still uncertain, but I am living and I have some hope that it will all be okay.

[kaoruyogi]

TMI Tuesday

Okay, so I'm jumping off the bridge with everyone else. Ask me anything!!!

[grubbinluvin]

Huuu..ive been terrible lately...i should ask laios to talk to me about his feasts in the dungeon as a distraction...i think he would for a bit..ouhgh please my knight..talk to me about the beasts you've tasted and ward away the ones in my mind..

[icequeenlila]

Call me Xie Lian, bc I just tried to cook noodles and doubled over coughing from the taste. Too much flavor omg😶

[cryptid-weiying]

。

[abprallen]

My job start got delayed until June oh my god ;__;

[geka-chan]