#babyhate

[bisexual-bitch-world]

hey baby, shut up. stop crying.

[sweariwouldnt]

God I hope there will be a day when Lou selfies will not immediately fill me with dread.

[sweariwouldnt]

Harry pap pics to arrive in 3..2..1...

[conchobarofficial]

unpopular opinion

i honestly think tmz posted that picture knowing that wasnt actually louis' kid. i mean, this is tmz. yeah, theyre a gossip outlet, but theyve been around a long time, they know how the industry works, and im absolutely positive they would have checked to see if it was legit. i dont know what this means, if it even means anything, but i feel like nt brokered with tmz on the sly to undermine this stunt, ot is scrambling to fix it, and as a result theyre inadvertently making it look faker as time goes on.

[manvchild]

MTA: STOP THE BABY HATE!

The MTA has for years now perpetrated a campaign of Baby Hate against Tiny Wee Babies and their caregivers.  The terrible alarm on subway gates is a direct assault on Tiny Wee Babies!  Enough is enough!

Let me explain:  

What is the alarm for?  To alert someone presumably, but who?  The person exiting?  I think not, because I’ve never seen anyone back away from the gate with a mumbled, “My mistake, excuse moi!”

  Is it to alert a station agent?  It might do that.  Might.  But in my experience, station agents aren’t prone to alert.  They are in fact, very very alert-resistant.  To give just one example:  one particularly late night I entered the downtown 23rd Street F Train station where they have fully removed the station agent’s booth.  I peeped one of those Service Alert signs and stared at it for a full minute before I grasped its meaning.  It seemed to say there were no downtown trains at that moment, but this was very at odds with the 40 or so people standing on the platform.   So I crossed 6th Avenue and went to the uptown side to ask.  Sure enough, there were no downtown trains.  “Shouldn’t someone make an announcement?,” I asked.  I was told that the microphone must be broken.  “Shouldn’t someone go tell people?,” I asked.  The station agent told me he wasn’t allowed to leave the booth.  So much for those 40 or so careless readers/unlucky suckers.

  So clearly a station agent is not going to go running to see what the gate alarm is all about.  So it’s not for the station agents.

It’s not for the person exiting.

It’s not for the station agent.

Is it for the other riders?  It must be!

    What action does this alarm call other riders to?  Methinks it calls upon them to direct their ire.  It calls on them to say to themselves, “I wish that fucking alarm wasn’t going off!!!”  And when the people go looking to lash out at the instigator of this misery, they see the person who opened the gate.

  And, excepting the occasional large-package-carrier, those using the gates are Tiny Wee Babies.  Well, Tiny Wee Babies in strollers pushed by parents.  When you are pushing a stroller, there is no other way to get out of the subway than through The Gates.  Through The Alarm.

  Of course, this is where the helpful MTA guidelines would have parents everywhere fold up their strollers and walk their children through the turnstiles.  But let’s face it:  the majority of parents are not following my guidelines on what to pack in their diaper bags.  They are saddled with the many provisions of a day out with baby.  Tiny Wee Babies are often asleep and then what are parents to do? 

They are between Scylla and Charybdis:  they can wake their child to take them through the turnstiles or they can pray that the ridiculous alarm won’t wake the sleepy darling.  So they roll the dice:  Through the Gate it is.

The alarm goes off and

a.  The parent is not dissuaded (“My mistake, pardon moi!”) and

b.  The station agent is not alerted (“I’m not allowed to leave the booth”) and

c.  The Tiny Wee Baby is awakened (“Waaaaaa”) or

d.  The Tiny Wee Baby is not awakened (“zzzz”) BUT

e.  The Ire is Directed at

The Tiny Wee Baby in its stroller!

  Who can hate a wee baby?  Everyone, when they set off a terrible alarm!

  Tell the MTA:  Stop the Baby Hate!