Building a character's backstory:
Building a character's backstory can be overwhelming, so here are some tips I use to build my character's backstory, all explained briefly.
If you're building a backstory, that means you've probably already got a character in mind, even if it's a blurry image, it's still an image. Think, what are this character's most defining traits?
You will want to find at least 3 negative traits, and at least three positive traits, do any of the negative and positive traits seem connected? For example, a kind-hearted character who's a people pleaser, maybe a paranoid character who can read people well. It's not uncommon that during our upbringing we develop traits in the two extremes, because as kids we take everything literally, including the messages we internalize.
However, don't underestimate the messages we internalize during our teenage years, because those can be more harmful to our behavior as adults.
Now that you've hopefully connected some of your traits, try tying them to events that could've caused them, this will be the most difficult step and will require a lot of your good brain juices, so make sure to sit down and really take your time to think. Try not to keep in mind that to internalize a message so deeply that it affects our behavior, we: 1- Have to hear it/say it to ourselves a lot. 2- Have to learn it through a traumatic/scarring event.
That's a bit vague, so let's elaborate, using a character of mine as an example. You have Leonardo, who, throughout his upbringing, was told that boys can't play with dolls, and dolls are for girls. Throughout his teenage years, the distinction between girl-things and boy-things becomes much clearer to him, and from the simple message he was told throughout his childhood, he internalizes that certain things are for girls and certain things are for boys. Dresses, skirts, floral perfumes, are for girls, pants, suits, cologne, are for boys.
This is a message he was explicitly told and explicitly told himself, so this is an example of a message he heard/said a lot, being internalized when he's an adult.
Now we continue with Leonardo, one day he's shopping with his father and older brother, the building erupts into flames, and without thinking his father grabs his older brother and runs away without looking back.
This is an example of a scarring event creating a message, the message being that his dad cares more about his brother. The message is not explicitly stated, but it's still internalized.
Have your fun playing around with messages and how they're internalized, be creative because everyone's past is different, and the best part of backstory building is that you can heal your own wounds through your character.
The last important detail of building a backstory is order, when did things happen? Create a timeline of important (good or bad) events that shaped your character, try to think about how these events could've impacted each other. This is not the most difficult part, but it is the most detailed one.
And finally, don't think or worry about other people's judgement, at the end of the day it's your story, and your character.
Maybe some of this advice will help, maybe it won't, either way, I hope this feline has enlightened you!
