Sep 26, 2025
Banks, Paper Magazine, 2025
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Banks, Paper Magazine, 2025
I’ve got you ~ JJ Maybank
⋆✴︎˚you’re in bed, reading a book while enjoying the sun on your skin that is pouring through your windows when you hear two knocks on your window. you sit up in bed, heart already racing, because you know that sound. jj only knocks like that when something is wrong. you rush to the window and pull it open.
“jj?”
he’s standing there on the roof, swaying slightly, face bruised and bloody. one eye swollen, lip split, nose still bleeding. he tries to smile.
“hey, baby,” he whispers, voice hoarse. “can i— can i come in?”
“oh my god, jj,” you breathe, grabbing his arms and pulling him inside. “yes, of course. come here, come here.”
the moment he’s in your room, he stumbles, and you catch him by the shoulders.
“i’m fine,” he mutters.
“no you’re not.”
you guide him to the bathroom, flicking on the light. he flinches at the brightness.
“was it your dad again?” you say looking into his eyes as he looks away. you hum in response leaving a soft kiss to his head.
you pat the counter and tell him to sit as you grab a washcloth, warm water and peroxide.
“you don’t have to—” he starts.
“yes i do,” you say, voice firm. “let me take care of you.”
you step between his swaying legs, gently tilting his chin up a little.
“this is gonna sting baby,” you whisper.
he swallows and nods, putting his hands on your hips.the moment the warm cloth touches his cheek, he winces, sucking in a sharp breath and squeezes your hips.
“sorry…” he murmurs.
“shhh it’s okay.”
you continue to clean his cuts as you whisper sweet things to him.
“you’re doing so good.”
“i love you.”
“you’re safe with me.”
“i’ve got you.”
jj’s breathing gets uneven.
“hey,” you say softly, brushing his hair back. “look at me.”
his eyes are full of tears.
“i’m sorry,” he whispers.
“for what?”
“for showing up like this. for being a mess. for— for being needy.”
“jay jay.” you say softly, cupping his face gently. “you can always need me. i’ll always be here for you.”
his shoulders shake first. then his breath stutters. he folds forward, burying his face in your chest, arms wrapping around your waist.
“i’m sorry,” he chokes. “i’m so fucking sorry.”
“shh,” you whisper, holding him tight. “you didn’t do anything wrong.”
“he— he just—” jj’s voice breaks. “i didn’t even say anything this time. he just—”
you press a kiss to the top of his head.
“you’re safe,” you whisper. “you’re safe with me.”
he sobs harder, fingers gripping your shirt.
“don’t let go,” he begs.
“i won’t,” you promise. “never.”
you guide him off the counter and onto the bathroom floor, sitting with your back against the wall, pulling him into your lap. he curls into you, shaking, crying into your chest while you stroke his hair and kiss his forehead, his temple, his bruised cheek.
“you didn’t deserve this,” you whisper. “none of it. not ever.”
jj sniffles, voice small. “it hurts.”
“i know, baby,” you murmur, kissing his swollen eye. “i know.”
“can i stay?” he whispers. “just for tonight?”
“rather you stay forever.” you say with a little smile.
he lets out a broken laugh, then hides his face again. you hold him until his breathing slows, until the shaking stops, until he melts against you completely.
“you’re too good to me,” he whispers.
“you deserve good,” you say simply.
he leans his forehead against yours.
“i love you,” he says, voice raw. “i don’t— i don’t know how to say it right, but i do. i love you baby, so much it scares me.”
you lean in and kiss him gently.
“i love you too.”
he exhales shakily.
“let’s go lay in bed yeah?”
he nods.
you help him up, guide him back to your room, and tuck him under your blankets. he pulls you in beside him immediately, arms around your waist, face pressed into your neck.
and you stay awake long after he falls asleep, running your fingers through his hair, watching his chest rise and fall, promising yourself you’ll protect him the way he’s always protected everyone else.
⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ ⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ ⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ ⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ ⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ ⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ ⋆✴︎˚｡⋆
What if I never even see you 'cause we're both on a stage?
Lana backstage with Banks. 🤍
Southeast PA
This piggybank will haunt my dreams.
