[YAYY!!! EVENT TIME!!! Or should i say, ✨IT'S! E....VENT! TIMEEE!!✨]
[Welcome to the Not-The-Mikes's first event! I hope you're just as excited as me for it, it's a chance to put our favorite characters in SITUATIONS!]
[Today's situation is... (Shhh, it's starting!)]
(Battat stands in the door of the pippins casino, unexcitedly getting used to the stuffy scent of the place and the overwhelming brouhaha of the crowd. He sighs, walking and checking in. He gets directions to his table, making his way there as slowly as possible to delay his arrival as much as he can, but, midway there..)
ENCRYPTION! (Longshot jumps at him, nearly tackling him to the ground) You came! That's already the start of our luck!!
Yeah, yeah. I don't have a habit of being a no-show. (Battat manages to unstick Longshot from himself like a misplaced sticker) And, for tonight, call me Battat. I've got... an audience that knows me better under that name.
Woah, an audience? That's really cool! And... ominous??? (Longshot nods and thinks...."I have no idea what that means") Let's get you to the table! Everyone's waiting! We even got one that's more cut off from everyone else, since you get overwhelmed easily. (He grabs Battat by the hand and drags him along.)
("cut off..... I guess that's nice... but wouldn't that mean that no one could really help me if they chose to rag on me?")
(When at the table, He takes his seat excitedly getting the attention of his tablemates) Hey guys, Battat's here! He said we should call him his stage name.
Hello, Battat. (BB pushes a cup of coffee towards him) The usual. Caramel decaf.
...thanks. ("Can I trust that cup??? He's never pranked me but... what if today's the first time...")
Tato~! It's been a while! Why didn't you show up earlier??? We almost started without you! (Payoff slides a poison and drug testing kit towards Battat)
(Battat quickly grabs it, checks if it's properly sealed, then tests his coffee. Waiting for the strip to change color, he looks around the table to see who's there. Sure enough, the whole group showed up.)
We're so happy to see you! What have you been up to lately? (Hit smiles, absentmindedly throwing a card in the game he and Wildcard were playing while waiting)
(If Wildcard's expression is to be believed, he just lost... good that nothing big was at stakes! He hands his leftover sandwich to Hit, then waves at Battat excitedly) !!!
(Battat waves back, way less excited) Uh.. not much.... (He looks down at his test kit. He's in the clear, seems the drink is safe)
Ready to play some Poker? We were hoping to ask you if you were fine with stri-
Uhm, actually! (Battat reaches into his pocket, pulling out a box of colorful cards and puts it on the table) I brought Uno... Pluey just got me a new Tenna themed deck and... i was hoping to... try it...? (He braces for rejection)
OF COURSE, TATO! 🧡(Payoff was the first to speak up, but he echoed the whole group's thoughts) We can play whatever you want!! Forever!!!
(Battat smiles. "Eugh..they're already making fun of me... that was quick") ... What are we playing for?
Oh it's for- (Longshot cut himself off with a cough) Uh.....Points.
How much?
I... Don't know?
You.. Don't know?
I have like 300 points with me!! Is that something?
That doesn't even cover a TV Dinner. Aren't you supposed to be mega rich?
I left everything at home! I didn't know we'd be playing for money, that's not what we agreed on!
It does cover a TV Dinner if you buy it from Dealer... His prices are pretty good lately.
ARE YOU CRAZY??? If I'm getting food from Dealer he better pay me to eat it!
Well, No one's forcing you...
I can probably find something else to put down...
Can you put your sweater down? I kinda want to try and get it!
THERE'S NO WAY????
I'm putting down 10 000 points. Can we stop arguing? (BB gave them an ice cold glare, intimidating everyone into silence)
...
...
...
Good. (BB grabs the box and opens it, pulling out the frontmost card.) ...The Tenna theme is cool.
(Battat blushes in embarrassment) ... Uh ...Y-yeah...thanks... (He stays silent after that, looking off to the side, feeling awkward)
("Dear god, I want him so bad.")
[And now, Event rules!]
[Battat and his friends are going to play Uno! They are going to be made aware of us in the first ask answered, i omitted including this here cause i wanted to get to the point, so you can send questions directly directed at them! Ever wanted to know something about Battat that Battat himself would never answer? They'll spill the beans! Want to directly affect the game and/or other miscellaneous events? Describe what happens! The only "Don't" there is is that you can't put yourself or any Ocs in the scene, you can only affect things through nebulous powers only Mike can summon!]
[Reminder to not go too far with any NSFW related asks even if there are some suggestive implications in the post. (Actually i hope all the details in here will be picked up hehe). Not to worry, every ask will have at least one illustration attached! Which also means that the posting schedule will be slower than usual, but i trust that you guys will be patient o( ^ ∇ ^ )o ]
[This event will last 15 asks, with a flexibility of 5 additional ones. I'm not expecting to hit 15 asks, let alone 20, this is just testing the grounds for how many asks to expect for future events. I will end the event if asks dry up or if i feel it has gone on for too long. The event tag is #UnoChance, at the end of the event it will be added to the pinned post in a new event section under the featured characters!]
[Want to check out the boys to see what they look like when not pixelized? CLICK HERE FOR FREE KROMER]
[AGAIN! ✨IT'S! E....VENT! TIMEEEE! ✨Ask box is OPEN!]
Okay, Battat. Say, hypothetically… like, purely hypothetically, everyone else at the table has feelings for you in some way. Again. Purely hypothetically. How would you navigate the game from there after learning of this? Hypothetically, of course.
[Pt.9]
("Is my audience also making fun of me now..? What kind of question is that..") I think it's silly to think of scenarios so far removed from reality but.. I guess I can entertain you?
(Payoff was already paying attention, but now he's double paying attention)
(Hit was trying to peek at Payoff's cards but his attention is now diverted)
(Wildcard looks in Battat's direction)
(Longshot hides his face behind his cards, but still listens)
(BB doesn't turn his head, but like Longshot, he's paying attention)
(Battat thinks for a while) Honestly, I don't know? I think i would leave.
???????????????
(He shakes his head) I've seen those guys in relationships, I wouldnt even want to risk ending up like that. I would leave.
(Payoff lays on the table face down)
(Hit feels stupid cause he knows exactly what Battat means)
(Wildcard seems confused since from his point of view all his past relationships went well)
(Longshot silently sighs, then starts rocking on the back legs of his stool)
...
....But...
...............
(Battat thinks some more) Well, if in your hypothetical scenario they also don't treat me like that... hm.. I would just navigate the game normally. And maybe it wouldn't feel so weird hanging out with them.
(Payoff immediately sits back up, and his head starts spinning. "Woah! Whoaw! He sounds like he would consider it...Woww!!!!")
(Hit nearly drops his cards, startled by Payoff)
(Longshot loses his balance and falls backwards)
?? (He looks down at Longshot to make sure he's okay)
(BB turns his head away from Battat to make sure his blushing goes unseen)
(Battat turns around) ...Did Longshot leave? What was that thud?
Nah i'm here!! (He stands up and picks his stool up, then sits back down)
(Battat looks at Payoff) And why is his head rolling?
I PUNCHED HIM!
(Payoff's head finally stops on a 6)
(Hit punches Payoff as a demonstration)
(That does work to make Payoff's head spin again, but he falls off his stool, knocked out)
HIT??????
I DIDNT MEAN TO HIT HIM THAT HARD!!!
("Maybe I should have gotten something non-alcoholic for Hit too.")
(Battat shoots everyone a weird look reaches for his cards, but after patting the table a few times, he looks down and doesn't see them) ...my cards?
(Longshot was already looking for his on the floor) Did anyone see my cards? I must have dropped them when i fell...
(Wildcard realizes that the cards he had in hand are now gone) ..???????
(Hit notices that both his and Payoff's cards also are gone) huh? Uhh... I didn't see your cards Longshot, did you see mine?
(BB looks down to check on his cards and they're gone too) ... (He looks at Hit, irritated)
DON'T LOOK AT ME LIKE THAT??? I DIDN'T DO ANYTHING???
(Battat scratches the back of his head) Uhh.. I guess we have to start a new game. We can count this one as a draw.
Battat is a stage name? Do you like it better than your other name, or is either fine? (also, Tato is a cute nickname. Your friends are cute <3)
[Pt.4]
It didn't start as a stage name, more like a pseudonym to avoid being recognized once I moved here. I prefer it, but Encryption is fine. I... got recognized anyway. Because I'm the only green pippin. Ever.
Tato IS a cute nickname, isn't it? As cute as the pippin it belongs to! It comes from how Battat is just a misspelling of how you say "potato" in French. It's soooo silly, right? I LOVE IT!
("Why is he never subtle with the mockery....")
His pippin name comes from the fact only he really understands what he's talking about most of the time... I think that's pretty cool...
...
We're all cute, but I'm the cutest, right? Right?
The ego on that guy...
Battat is lucky that he likes his new name. I don't like mine.
(Longshot thinks that BB ruined the vibe) ...
(Wildcard is thankful for not being able to talk, at least there's no pressure to say anything right now) ...
((gives everyone but Battat a +4 card))
Go crazy :3
[Pt. 3]
(Wildcard looks at the card in the center again, then at his own, thinking of what to do.)
("He's got options... bad news for Hit and Longshot.")
(Eventually, he decides, pulling one card out of his hand, putting it down on the pile. +4)
(Hit reeeeaaaally slowly turns his head towards Wildcard) What color....?
(Wildcard points at Battat)
HAH! (Hit puts down a green +2) Thank you Wildcard!!!
(Payoff puts down a +4 without much hesitation or eagerness, then glances at Hit again. "That was his only plus card. Or, his only special card even, maybe." He looks at BB) Blue.
(BB puts down a +4 card) Yellow.
(Battat sits in silence, looking at his cards)
(".............oh no. He's not considering his options. He's in shock" Payoff puts his face in his hands)
(Wildcard also notices that, looks at Battat, comes to the same conclusion, and he starts quickly looking at everyone else at the table to see if they've noticed too)
(Hit's smile becomes awkward and he opens his eyes for once, looking at Battat, nervous)
(Averting his eyes from Battat, Longshot tries to keep his eyes on his cards and starts sweating)
(If BB's stare could burn, Battat would be no more "I may have... fumbled this one. Maybe I should have taken the hit........")
...26 huh. You guys didn't do that on purpose... did you... ("I'm sure they did...")
[They let put the most miserable-sounding "yaaaay....", then sniffle.]
Um... yeah, I'm sure I can come up with a few rad beats if needed.. man, I was just so excited to work for the grooviest TV host and meet all the folks who helped him get this far.. but I'm just some kinda joke. It's still an honor to be meeting you three though, really! Thanks for being so kind!
[They scrunch their nose slightly, a bit upset.]
Well.. whatever, I'm here now! Y'guys need help with anythin'? [They grin lopsidedly]
Oh! I can also make promotional art and posters n' stuff, too! I draw!
-🎧.mp3
Don't worry, Em, yer not a joke. It's normal to be excited when ya get told you can work for one of yer idols. Look at you, ya did get that job. Can ya imagine the look on the face of those pippins when they learn that? Who's tha joke now? (Jongler seems uncharacteristically jolly)
Yeah. Right nowwwww we're not doing anything. So I guess make yourself at home? There's snacks in the dresser's bottom drawer. Jongler is gonna be drinking tea while taking care of some paperwork, if you think that's fun. Pluey is probably gonna go pass out on the couch but if you want you can put on a movie, the VHSes and the player are under the TV. Or, if you want...
Shout outs to Battat. Most oblivious Pippins in all of TV World. Also the Pippins with the most trust issues! That’s 2 awards in one!
[Pt. 1]
That's a big box of cards! I don't remember Uno having so many...
It's actually closer to 2 decks and it has a lot more special cards than there is in the base game, Tenna wanted his game to be bigger and cooler.
Yeah, that sounds like Tenna!
Alright, I'm shuffling the cards!
There's no way! You're just gonna put some in your sleeves, I'M shuffling the deck.
I don't have sleeves for that... BUT YOU DO!
What if i did it?
FAT CHANCE.
(Wildcard reaches for the deck, but his hand is grabbed by Hit to stop him)
You can't either! You've got sleeves and a suspicious look in your eyes!
(Wildcard silently giggles, busted)
Battat could do it?
You're gonna make the birthday boy do the dirty work??
It's not my birthday...
Tato, I didn't mean it like that, I know your birthday! 🧡
I think BB should shuffle the cards... I trust him the most to not sneak any cards from the deck. (Longshot slides the Uno box towards BB)
(BB grabs the box, takes the cards out, and shuffles them. When he feels they've been mixed sufficiently, he starts distributing them, 7 cards for each, face down on the table.)
(While BB is giving out the cards, Battat turns his head to look at us.) By the way, I'm neither oblivious nor do I have trust issues! Well, maybe the trust issues, kinda, but I have my reasons. AND I DON'T WANT YOUR AWARDS FOR THIS??????
(Wildcard leans over, looking where Battat was looking) ...
(Payoff too tries to look where Battat was looking) ...Who are you talking to?
To, uh, my audience.
Your audience...?
(Battat points at the fourth wall camera, making everyone look there to check what he's on about)
(Wildcard finally notices and waves at us)
Wait! That's actually so cool! (Hit gets up and runs up to our little window into their reality) Hi everyone!! (He starts trying to get a closer look, then starts making silly faces)
Quit that. (BB pulls him back by the bow, then throws him effortlessly and flawlessly over the table and straight back onto his seat, before going back to his own. He finishes up handling the cards by creating 6 more piles of 7 cards, placing them to his side, and putting the pile of remaining cards to his other side.) The cards have been dealt. Everyone look at their hand.
