Hello. What do you think about the whole top/bottom argument? I'm team switch, leaning towards top!dean, and apparently, it's less popular? Lol. Sorry if it's too Percy or something ^^""
[Well - answering this question in a SFW way was way too hard - hahahhaaa - I’m putting this under a cut in case there’s people going through my blog in crowded places. There’s nothing overly dirty, though, just, you know - sex.]
To be honest, I’ve given up trying to understand what’s popular in smut fanfiction and sex positions headcanons, because it’s stuff that seems to change every couple of months, and mostly revolves around things people don’t actually do IRL. Like - there was a period where every single piece of fanfiction I read included at least twenty minutes of cockwarming - and, as someone who is slightly peeved by any kind of BDSM, those scenes annoyed me to no end. I literally saw no point in doing that, so much so that after a week of Dean sneaking into places just so he could sit on his knees and do nothing, I actually brought up the subject in the middle of a crowded pub and asked my (male) friends if they thought cockwarming had any merit to it - I wanted to be generous, see, and allow for the fact that, as a cockless person, maybe I wasn’t seeing clearly (although, well - if I was trying to work and someone kept his mouth on my boob for one hour without moving - ugh - wtf?).
Hilariously, none of my friends had ever heard of the term - or the concept - before, which led to wild speculations about cock warNing - something that seemed to make more sense to them. “Attention, cock incoming!” yelled one of them, a senior lecturer at the local university; and another mused perhaps it had something to do with Scaramucci’s much derided front stabbing (“All this time, we thought he was talking about knives, but maybe we were wrong?”). And then, of course, someone had to Google it and -
- well.
All this to say, I’m not sure how much credit we can give to our own theories on our favourite characters’ sex lives. Sex is profoundly personal, tends to change depending on our partner(s) and age and emotional situation - I enjoy a bit of smut as much as anyone, but I mostly find it completely unrealistic, and if you haven’t had any sexual experience yet, you probably shouldn’t go there looking for tips. And as to Dean and the whole top/bottom thing - well - since I’m not a gay man, I can’t really pretend to understand how those categories work and if they’re really as rigorously unchanging as fanfiction insists they are. Surely variety is the spice of life? But if I had to speculate - my headcanon, based on what we’ve seen on the show, is that Dean likes to be slapped around a bit and let his partner do the heavy lifting (the lazy slob). That doesn’t mean he’s a bottom, but somehow, that’s how I write him in my fics - on those rare occasions when he and Cas end up in bed. I don’t know why, exactly - maybe it has to do with that famous twin encounter back in S3? Unlike others, I’m not fully convinced those twins had been a man and a woman, but what I do think is that Dean had been up with his butt in the air when Sam had walked in, because Sam seemed a bit too disgusted to have interrupted, say, a blowjob or a conventional bit of missionary fun. Nah - I think he came up close and personal with Dean’s, uhm, chcololate starfish (apparently that’s a real term? who even comes up with this stuff?? honestly) and went and washed his eyes with bleach. And judging by how relaxed and whatever Dean was after that incident, yeah - he was there with two women - no way Sammy catches him with a guy and Dean says it’s a ‘beautiful, natural thing’ and grins at him.
And let’s not forget that Cas is dom as hell - the only reason he’s been all mopey for years is because he’s depressed and PTSD af, but his normal state is that of a commander and a master of sass and “What are you going to do about it, boy?” - so, yeah, I think the very beginning of anything between them would be grateful and fumbling and soft and sweet, but after that - after Cas can be convinced Dean won’t break, that he actually likes it - then sign me up for the whole thing - Cas holding Dean down and keeping him pinned to the wall with one hand and threatening the fuck out of him (quite literally) and making at least one light bulb explode when he comes, and Dean - Dean can’t believe his fucking luck (again, literally) and he teases Cas and riles him up and winks at him in public places hoping to get him to forget himself a bit, to get him angry, only just, because Cas - after all the violence he’s seen, he needs to be reminded, every time, that being a bit rough in bed is a lot of fun if your partner is okay with it, and it doesn’t mean you’re not kind and you’re not taking this seriously.
(But that doesn’t mean they do it every night, you know? With this whole top/bottom debate, people tend to forget that horniness ebbs and flows, that sometimes you’re just tired, or can’t be bothered, or come after one minute of a messy, blessed, unexpected blowjob; that sometimes all you want is to sit on a couch with your partner and lean against them and feel the warmth between the two of you, and marvel and cry at how beatiful this is - how grateful you are to love - and to be loved in return.)
"Never hang out with girls fatter than you are."- A direct quote from a guy who later tried to ask me out. Which is basically the same as saying: You are the MAX fatness level I think it's acceptable for a woman to be. Needless to say, I won't be going out with that asshole EVER.
Old white guys are scared shitless of black youths. Scared because they know of the horrors their race did to another for no good reason, they fight any potential 'backlash' and anger with hate and violence. These white guys will get to you before you get to them; their fear of being questioned is stronger than your anger about past events.
