Hi! I love the one after Battle of the Labyrinth so much!!! Since you’re obviously amazing at writing percabeth angst, can you do 14 with annabeth and someone like silena?? Thank you so much!!
i have nothing left | percabeth
okay so i wrote this as some kind of continuation or like annabeth’s pov for this fic, but it’s not attached
Annabeth doesn’t even realize when she starts running. She’s leaving the stables, jaw clenched to stop the tears in her eyes from coming down. One minute, she’s thinking about getting back to the Athena cabin as soon as she can, to deal with her feelings alone and in peace as she explores her Dedalus computer. The other, her legs are working on their own and running through the green lawn from Camp Half Blood, automatically following the instructions of “getting there as soon as possible”. Until she bumps in Silena Beaugard and her ass lands loudly on the ground, as she falls back.
That’s also the moment she notices she’s failed on her task not to cry publicly, since she can feel tears slowly coming down her already wet cheeks.
“Ouch!” Silena turns around, half bothered, half hurt, but her expression rapidly changes when she sees Annabeth on the ground. “Annabeth?”
“Hey,” she takes the hand the Aphrodite’s daughter offers her and gets up. “Sorry, Silena. I didn’t see you there.”
“It’s ok.” They look at each other other for a moment, until Silena reaches out and dries Annabeth’s cheek softly. “Are you okay?”
Annabeth decides to pretend she doesn’t know Silena’s talking about the crying. “Yeah, it was nothing. Again, I’m really sorry for bumping into you.”
She only nods slightly and keeps looking at her empathetically. Annabeth waits for a moment, expecting she would say something, but there’s only silence, so she takes one step to go away. That’s when Silena grabs her wrist, and she stops.
“I have something to show you. Can you come with me?”
Annabeth frowns, slightly annoyed. It is obvious that she was upset, and she just wants to be alone and cry in peace. Out of all things, one she’d never associated with Silena was insensibility. But there she is, asking Annabeth to go and see something when she clearly isn’t up for it.
“Sure,” she says, taking a deep breath to swallow her tears as she follows her friend towards the beach.
They walk in silence until they reach the beach, where Silena keeps walking and looking for something Annabeth doesn’t now what it is. This is the last place she’d wish to be at this moment. A part of Percy is the ocean itself, and being there is almost like him being all around her.
“Here,” Silena stops suddenly at a opening between some rocks that meet each other in different ways and places, forming some kind of cave. She goes in and turns to Annabeth, “Come.”
Annabeth walks behind her and they sit on some rocks, quietly. Somehow, it’s comfortable and cozy. The rocks protect them from the wind and sand, but they’re so close to the sea that every time a stronger wave comes, Annabeth wonders if it won’t reach them.
They sit in silence for a while, staring at the ocean as the sun starts to come down in the horizon. Silena doesn’t say anything, which Annabeth actually finds weird, since she’s a very talkative person. So they just sit there.
Until a stronger blow of salty wind suddenly comes and rustles their hairs and makes Annabeth’s eyes burn, and then the ocean in front of her and the waves and everything is just too much– too Percy for her... And she can’t hold it back anymore. And then she’s sobbing desperately and her face is just so wet she can’t tell how much of is from crying and how much is from the salt air. And Silena holds her and caresses her hair and, thanks Athena, doesn’t try to calm her down or say things will be fine. She’s just there, and Annabeth couldn’t be any more thankful.
After a while, she’s stopped sobbing enough to breathe, and she’s just too angry and desperate and hurt not to say anything.
“I- I can’t lose him,” when she speaks, it becomes harder to breathe and easier to cry. “I can’t- I...”
She finally looks Silena in the eye, and she’s so glad she does. She never would imagine it, but it feels like coming home to a lightened fireplace. Annabeth realizes she’d never thought about it that way – probably because love had always hurt her and left her alone -, but love could also be about comfort. And permanence.
“You’re not gonna lose him,” Silena speaks softly, pulling one of Annabeth’s blond curls behind her ear. “He’s right here.”
“But he’s not, though. He’s not here enough. He’s not here enough to train and learn. He’s not here enough to make sure he’s not gonna be killed soon. He’s not-,” she sobs. “He’s not here enough to notice that I- That I lov...”
She’s crying too much to complete her sentence again.
“To notice that you love him,” Silena whispers.
It’s too cruel. Annabeth’s sure she doesn’t deserve this. She knows demigods have difficult lives, but she’s had enough trouble for a lifetime already. She didn’t deserve to be pulled into this whole mess. She didn’t even want to be friends with him in the first place. And now she has to deal with these stupid feelings and it’s just too complicated and too much for it not to hurt so bad that he doesn’t even care. And that, even if he did, he might die in a few weeks and it wouldn’t matter anyway.
“I hate love,” she finally says.
“You don’t hate love. You hate that you care about it. And that it leaves you,” Silena’s voice is gentle, but fierce. “You don’t know if you’re gonna lose him, Annabeth.”
“I just- If he leaves me, I’ll be alone again. If he dies, I’ll... I have nothing left.”
Annabeth just knows he will leave. Like her father. Like Thalia, in some way. Like Luke.
“Percy’s strong,” Silena says. “He’ll survive. I- I believe he will.”
Suddenly, her voice is cracking and she stares at the ground. Annabeth can’t figure out why exactly.
“I- I kissed him,” Annabeth’s not sure why she tells Silena that. She just does. Her friend looks up at her, mouth opened. “At Mount St. Helen, last summer. When I thought he was gonna die, I... I kissed him.”
“What’d he say?”
She shrugs. “We never talked about it. I don’t know how he feels.”
“Oh dear Aphrodite, the two of you...”
When Annabeth looks at Silena again, she’s smiling softly.
“Annabeth, I’m pretty sure he loves you too. Maybe he doesn’t understand it yet. Boys are stupid that way.”
That takes out a slight smile from her.
“I know you’re tired, and scared, but... Have a little faith on him. And on us. You’re not alone, and you won’t be.”
Annabeth nods calmly.
“Now c’mon, we have to get ready for dinner,” Silena gets up and offers her one hand. “Also, I’ve been thinking of something we could use in our favor for capture the flag. And maybe we can get ourselves some dates for the 4th of July with that...”
Annabeth has no idea what she’s talking about, but it sure sounds like a plan. And, well, plans are definitely her thing. So she follows.
