Synopsis — Their love languages towards you, and the kind they want to receive.
Note — Olivia Benson, Elliot Stabler, Alexandra Cabot, Casey Novak
(Female centered, but no pronouns used.)
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!!
Olivia Benson
• — Olivia Benson is 100% acts of service.
• — She is the kind of lover that will tie your shoelaces, even if she’s running late.
• — WILL AND I MEAN WILL, do the simplest tasks for you just because she can!
• — "What you do mean you went out to get groceries? Without me?"
• — Her way of saying "I love you." is to comb your hair after you finished showering, and she asks you to sit on her lap as she does. (biting my fists rn)
• — Though, she craves for words of affirmation.
• — She didn’t grow up in a home where she felt appreciated, nor did she ever felt the comfort of her parents.
• — But she knew she loved you when you told her the sweetest sentence ever.
• — "I love you so much that you make me get out of bed to get groceries."
• — Seconds later, you felt arms behind you. Not long enough before your shoulder dampens.
Elliot Stabler
• — This man is so quality time.
• — He knows he has a dangerous job that occupies his time, hours and hours in the precinct.
• — But any chance he gets, he will come home to you.
• — "Pack your bags, we’re going to Italy!"
• — He’s afraid of losing you, or letting you go to the plane’s bathroom because you’re comfortable in his arms.
• — Amidst the turbulence, he enjoys your physical touch.
• — From all the abuse and torment he witnessed, it’s rare for him to feel safe nowadays.
• — That’s why he isn’t afraid to admit that he loves the way you kiss his forehead, trace patterns on his gentle calloused hands, or spooning him when he gets nightmares.
• — "Italy won’t run away, let’s just stay 5 more minutes in bed."
• — More so, your vanilla scented hair was his view of a vacation.
Alexandra Cabot
• — Shoot me when I say this blonde’s love language isn’t giving gifts.
• — Being a lawyer with an amazing conviction rate also means having money, money, money!
• — She enjoys spoiling you, giving you everything you need and want just because she can. She refuses to let you reach for your wallet, at all.
• — "I bought the necklace you stared at earlier!"
• — Besides your lips, Ms. Cabot also tracks your eyes. (i would like to have you for christmas)
• — Staring at you, she never noticed how much she longed for acts of service.
• — Her parents were always away, and she was left alone. Her parents’ money were their way of saying they’re sorry they couldn’t come to her graduation.
• — She was surprised when you called in sick, even though she was the one coughing like there’s no tomorrow.
• — "What do you mean I could’ve bought myself medicine instead of your necklace?"
• — You can’t help but smile as you sat beside her laying body, wiping her warm face with a wet cloth as she explains how much your necklace reminds her of your eyes.
Casey Novak
• — This redheaded loser in a hot body cannot go on a day without physical touch.
• — She was raised as an affectionate child, expressing her love greatly as her parents did.
• — Her auburn hair is as warm as her as you lay between her arms, her face on the crook of your neck as she sleeps soundly.
• — "If only court saw how soft and adorable you are when you sleep, you wouldn’t seem so intimidating." You say, playing with her hair.
• — Smiling lovingly, she unconsciously pulls you closer.
• — Aside from her comfort, she adores your words of affirmation.
• — She was the kid who would wait in her teachers’ approval, hoping that she did good enough for their expectations.
• — Luckily for her, she didn’t have to wait anymore.
• — "You think I look soft and adorable when I sleep? I think I want to kiss you right now."
• — And she did, like the soft and adorable loser she is.
write a benovak fic based on it aint me babe by joan baez please
— i’m not the one you want, babe. i’m not the one you need.
— casey novak x olivia benson
summary: bruising kisses that feel like punishment. love buried under years of sharp words and stubborn silence. olivia and casey have never been good at talking—but sometimes they’re better at breaking each other open.
The apartment was dark when Olivia shoved the door open, the weight of the day still clinging to her shoulders. The slam echoed harder than she intended, but she didn’t apologize. She never did anymore. She dropped her jacket across the back of a chair and rubbed a hand down her face, exhaustion clawing at her bones.
It had been another brutal case. Another girl whose story was half-believed until she was shredded on the stand. Another perp who walked out of court smirking. Another day Olivia carried the loss home like it was her own.
The lamp flicked on in the living room. Casey sat curled in the armchair, stacks of files balanced precariously on her knees, glasses sliding down her nose. She looked just as worn, lips pressed thin, her jaw tight like she hadn’t unclenched it in hours.
“You’re late,” Casey said, her voice soft but sharp.
Olivia exhaled, already too tired for this. “I had paperwork.”
Casey’s laugh was humorless. “There’s always paperwork.” She shut the folder in her lap with a snap and leaned forward. “Do you know how it feels to stand in that courtroom and fight until your throat’s raw, only to watch him walk free?”
Olivia kicked off her boots and avoided her gaze. “Do you know how it feels to hold a victim in your arms and promise her it’ll be okay—when you know it won’t be?”
Their eyes finally met. Two storms colliding in the middle of the room.
Casey shook her head slowly, the bitterness rolling off her. “You don’t let anyone in, Liv. Not even me.”
Olivia’s jaw flexed. “Because when I do, they leave.”
The silence that followed was thick enough to choke on.
Casey stood, the folder slipping from her lap and scattering papers across the floor, but she didn’t care.
“You think I don’t know what it’s like to lose?” she snapped. “I fight every day for women who don’t get justice. I put my whole life into this job, and it’s never enough for you.”
Olivia squared her shoulders, bristling. “This isn’t about me not thinking you fight. You’re one of the only ones who does. But when you lose, you go cold. You shut down. And I can’t—I can’t handle the distance when I’m already drowning.”
The words came out harsher than she meant. But they were true.
Casey laughed bitterly, shaking her head. “Distance? Liv, you’re the one who builds walls so high no one can climb them. I try to reach you, and you slam the door in my face.”
Olivia stepped forward, close enough to feel the heat radiating off her. Her voice dropped, low and dangerous. “Maybe you don’t want to know what’s on the other side of that door, Casey.”
Their chests brushed. Neither moved. The air was electric, volatile.
Casey’s breathing was sharp, uneven. “Maybe I do. Maybe I want all of it. Even the ugly parts.”
Olivia’s throat tightened. Her hand twitched like she wanted to push Casey away, but instead her fingers found the curve of her hip, gripping hard. The contact sent a shock through them both.
Casey’s lips parted, a gasp caught in her throat. Anger and want blurred until they were indistinguishable.
“God, Casey—” Olivia muttered, and then her mouth was on Casey’s—rough, desperate, almost violent.
Casey kissed her back just as hard, teeth clashing, hands fisting in Olivia’s shirt like she wanted to tear it off and shove her away at the same time. Their kiss tasted like salt, like tears neither would admit to.
Her mouth crashed against Casey’s, all teeth and fury. Casey met her with equal force, tugging hard at Olivia’s shirt until buttons popped and skittered across the floor. Neither cared.
Olivia spun them, pressing Casey hard against the counter. Papers crumpled under her back, forgotten. Casey arched into her, a choked sound leaving her throat as Olivia’s hand slid beneath her blouse, fingers splayed against heated skin.
“You infuriate me,” Casey gasped between kisses, her nails digging into Olivia’s shoulders.
Olivia’s reply was another bruising kiss, her tongue pushing past Casey’s lips, claiming her mouth like she was punishing her for every unspoken word. Casey whimpered but didn’t pull away; if anything, she dragged Olivia closer, grinding against her thigh.
Clothes tore away in frantic motions—Casey’s blouse hitting the floor, Olivia’s shirt hanging half-open. The air between them was charged, angry, desperate.
Olivia’s lips trailed down Casey’s neck, biting, sucking, marking her. Casey tilted her head back, gasping, one hand clutching the counter for balance while the other tangled in Olivia’s hair.
“This isn’t—this isn’t fixing anything,” Casey breathed, though her hips betrayed her, rocking forward into Olivia’s touch.
“I don’t care,” Olivia growled against her skin, teeth scraping her collarbone. “I need you.”
Casey’s eyes fluttered shut, a tear slipping free even as a low moan escaped her lips. “Then take me.”
Olivia’s hand dipped lower, skimming the waistband of Casey’s skirt, her fingers trembling with urgency.
Olivia’s hand shoved Casey’s skirt up, bunching the fabric around her hips. Her breath came hot against Casey’s throat as her fingers found their way past lace.
Casey gasped, her back arching hard against the counter as Olivia’s mouth claimed hers again. The first brush of Olivia’s fingers over her slick heat pulled a broken moan from her chest.
“Fuck, Liv—”
Olivia silenced her with another bruising kiss as two fingers slid inside, the stretch sudden, deep. Casey clawed at her back, nails dragging over muscle, leaving red lines in their wake.
“You’re so wet,” Olivia muttered against her lips, her voice low and wrecked. “So fucking ready for me.”
Casey bucked into her touch, panting. “Harder. Please—harder.”
Olivia obliged, driving her fingers deep, curling them until Casey cried out. Her thumb circled ruthlessly over her clit, dragging desperate sounds from her throat.
The counter shook beneath them as Casey writhed, trapped between Olivia’s weight and the edge of the wood.
“Look at you,” Olivia growled, pulling back just enough to see her face. Casey’s cheeks flushed crimson, her lips parted, eyes glassy with tears and want. “Always so in control in court. But here—” She thrust hard, making Casey sob. “Here you fall apart for me.”
Casey bit her lip until it bled, muffling the scream building in her chest. Her whole body was trembling, hips rocking helplessly against Olivia’s hand.
“Say it,” Olivia demanded, her voice like steel. “Say you need me.”
“I—fuck, I need you,” Casey cried, her voice breaking. “I need you, Liv—don’t stop.”
Her climax tore through her then, violent, her thighs clamping tight around Olivia’s hand. She shook, gasping, nails digging into Olivia’s shoulders as wave after wave crashed through her.
Olivia didn’t let up until Casey sagged against the counter, trembling and breathless, her hair damp with sweat.
Casey was still shuddering when Olivia’s fingers slowed, but they didn’t leave her. She whimpered at the lingering pressure, hips twitching involuntarily.
“Too much?” Olivia murmured, her mouth brushing Casey’s ear. Her tone was soft, but her fingers curled again, deliberate.
Casey gasped, her nails digging half-moon marks into Olivia’s shoulders. “Y-yes—fuck, Liv, I can’t—”
“Yes, you can.” Olivia kissed the corner of her mouth, tasting salt and desperation. “You can take it. You always do.”
Her thumb pressed harder against Casey’s clit, coaxing another strangled moan out of her. Casey’s head thudded back against the cabinets, eyes fluttering closed, tears streaking down her cheeks as her body clenched again.
“Olivia—please—” Her voice broke on the plea.
Olivia’s hand was relentless, fingers driving into her with punishing precision, thumb circling until Casey’s legs gave out. Only Olivia’s weight pinning her to the counter kept her upright.
“Fuck—oh god—” Casey sobbed as another climax tore through her, raw and uncontrollable. Slick coated Olivia’s hand, dripping down her wrist, soaking into Casey’s panties shoved aside.
Olivia groaned low in her throat, watching her unravel. “You’re beautiful like this. Falling apart just for me.”
Casey clung to her, trembling violently, lips pressed to Olivia’s neck as if she could anchor herself there. But instead of calm, her body jolted again when Olivia’s pace didn’t falter.
“Liv, I can’t—I can’t—”
“You can,” Olivia whispered, kissing her temple even as her hand worked ruthlessly. “You’re strong. You’re mine. Give me one more.”
Casey broke then, a raw scream muffled against Olivia’s shoulder as her body gave in again, convulsing around her fingers. Her slick gushed over Olivia’s hand, the counter damp beneath her thighs.
When it was over, she sagged completely, boneless, breathing ragged and wet with tears.
And that’s when the silence hit. Heavy. Fragile.
Casey turned her face toward Olivia’s neck, her voice a whisper, cracked in half. “This… this isn’t fixing us, is it?”
Olivia froze at Casey’s words, her breath stalling against her damp hair. The question hung in the air heavier than the scent of sweat and sex clinging to them.
Her fingers finally stilled inside her, slipping free with a wet sound that made Casey wince, oversensitized. Olivia gently cupped her instead, but the tenderness came too late—Casey was already trembling for an entirely different reason.
“Casey…” Olivia whispered, kissing the wet trail on her cheek. “Don’t do this now.”
Casey shook her head against her. “When, Liv? When I’m too tired from work? When I’ve poured myself into another case and you’ve buried yourself in the job? When we’ve both run ourselves dry, and all that’s left is this—” Her voice broke, a sob catching in her throat. “Just you fucking me on the kitchen counter like it’ll fix everything?”
Olivia’s chest tightened. She cradled Casey’s jaw, forcing her to look up. Her green eyes were wide and wet, her lips kiss-bruised and trembling.
“You think that’s all this is?” Olivia’s voice was sharp, but it wavered at the edges. “You think I do this because it’s easier than talking to you?”
Casey’s throat bobbed, silent, but her silence spoke louder than words.
Olivia pressed her forehead to Casey’s, both of them still half-undressed, Casey’s panties shoved to one side, Olivia’s hand slick and trembling. “I touch you like this because it’s the only time you let me see you. Really see you. When you finally stop fighting me. When you let yourself break.”
Casey’s lip quivered. Her hands clutched Olivia’s shirt like it was the only thing tethering her to earth. “And what happens when I can’t hold myself together at all anymore?”
Olivia kissed her hard then—messy, wet, desperate—like she could swallow the question whole.
When they finally broke apart, Casey was crying again, but quieter. Softer.
And Olivia whispered against her mouth, broken and raw, “Then I’ll hold you. Every time.”
The silence that followed was thick, but different—no longer sharp with anger, no longer jagged with lust. Just heavy. Just them.
Olivia eased her hand away completely, tugging Casey’s skirt back into place, smoothing down the fabric like the gesture alone could stitch her together. Casey’s body still trembled against her, little aftershocks rippling through her muscles, but the fight in her had bled out.
Without a word, Olivia slid her arms under Casey, lifting her off the counter. Casey startled, arms looping instinctively around Olivia’s neck.
“Liv—”
“Shh,” Olivia hushed softly, pressing her lips to Casey’s temple. “I’ve got you.”
She carried her through the apartment, past the trail of discarded clothes and unresolved tension, into the bathroom. The harsh light overhead made Casey squint, her cheeks blotchy, her mascara smudged. Olivia kissed the corner of her damp eye before setting her gently on the closed toilet lid.
“Stay here,” Olivia murmured, turning on the tap. The tub began to fill, water rushing, steam curling up between them. She tested it with her hand, adjusting until it was warm but not scalding.
Casey watched her the whole time, silent, eyes glassy but softening with every movement. The sight of Olivia—tired, shirt torn, her hands trembling as she fussed with the water—broke something in her chest all over again.
When Olivia crouched in front of her, hands resting on Casey’s knees, her voice was low, careful. “Let me take care of you tonight. No arguments. Just… let me.”
Casey swallowed hard, nodding.
Olivia undressed her slowly this time—no tearing, no haste. Just gentle touches, reverent, pressing kisses to each inch of bare skin revealed. By the time Casey sank into the warm bath, her shoulders had slumped, the fight completely gone from her frame.
Olivia knelt at the tub’s edge, sleeves rolled up, a washcloth in hand. She began wiping the sweat and tension from Casey’s skin, careful not to meet her gaze until she felt Casey’s hand catch hers under the water.
“Liv?” Casey’s voice was hoarse, small.
“Yeah, baby?”
“I’m scared,” Casey whispered.
Olivia leaned in, brushing her wet hair back, kissing her forehead. “Me too. But I’m not going anywhere.”
Casey closed her eyes, a shaky breath slipping from her chest. For the first time that night, she let herself believe her.
By the time Olivia helped Casey out of the bath, her legs were unsteady but her breathing was even. Olivia wrapped her in a towel, pressing another slow kiss to her shoulder, before guiding her to the bedroom.
Casey sank into the sheets like she’d been holding herself upright for months. Olivia slid in beside her, still half-dressed, tugging the blankets over them both. She gathered Casey into her arms, pressing her chest against her back, curling herself around her as if she could shield her from every wound, past and present.
For a while, there was nothing but silence. The city hummed faintly outside the window, headlights painting shifting patterns on the walls. Casey’s fingers toyed with Olivia’s, tracing idle lines against her skin.
“Do you mean it?” Casey’s voice broke the quiet, soft but pointed.
Olivia kissed the back of her neck, voice steady. “Every word.”
Casey turned in her arms then, searching her face in the dim light. Her cheeks were still blotchy, her eyes tired, but there was something raw there—hope clawing its way through the cracks. Olivia smoothed a strand of hair from her face, thumb brushing the damp skin beneath her eye.
“You’re not easy,” Olivia murmured, lips quirking into something that wasn’t quite a smile. “But you’re worth it.”
Casey huffed a broken laugh, shaking her head. “You’ve got terrible taste.”
Olivia silenced her with a kiss—slower this time, gentle, lips lingering like a vow. Casey melted into it, her hands sliding up to cup Olivia’s face, holding her like she was afraid she’d disappear if she let go.
When they finally broke apart, Olivia rested her forehead against Casey’s. “Sleep, sweetheart. I’ve got you.”
Casey closed her eyes, body loosening completely against her. Olivia stayed awake a little longer, watching her, her chest tight with everything unsaid.
In the dark, she whispered it anyway. Words Casey wouldn’t hear, or maybe she would.
“I’m yours.”
And for the first time in too long, it felt like enough.
