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Everything You Need To Know About The Illuminati: The History, The Hilarious Theories, And Their (Alleged) Hopes For The Future

A single dollar bill.

Could be paying rent that month. Could be buying a sandwich from the gas station for the homeless person outside. Could be down the back of your Ikea couch.

It’s the basic item every American probably has on them right now and it unites hundreds of millions of people. But there is something about the one dollar bill which has raised many questions.

Like most currencies, it champions its political and social history, with various founding fathers, presidents, and people of note teamed up with historic locations. You can tell a lot about a country from its cash.

So, why is this proudly stamped onto the dollar bill?

This is the Eye of Providence.

At the top of a pyramid sits a floating eye that appears to have shafts of light beaming at its surroundings. To many, this is simply interpreted as the ‘all seeing eye of God’. But to some it is a sign of a much graver threat.

The New World Order.

Or, the ultimate goal of the secret society, the Illuminati.

(So secret that everyone knows about them.)

Incorporated as the reverse of the Great Seal of the United States in 1782, it was used to represent the ‘benevolent oversight’ of God. But the presence of the mysterious, occult-like symbol on the most used currency in the world still has us guessing whether there really is a hidden, elite group playing puppet-master.

From Bavaria to the Battle of Waterloo, today we delve into the who, why, and what-the-f*ck of the Illuminati.

Who Are The Illuminati?

I mean, who isn’t the Illuminati?

A number of groups today have adopted the term either as a way to bait-them-clicks, or simply out of admiration for the elusive society.

But the most famous group to lay claim to the name was a secret society named the Bavarian Illuminati. They existed for a brief nine years in late 18th century Germany and were inspired by the Enlightenment values sweeping Europe at the time. It started as a small group of lads determined to limit the role of the Church in public life and effectively find the true ‘Illumination’ referenced in Enlightenment. One of their core desires was benevolent despotism (an authoritarian despot that followed the principles of the Enlightenment).

The society was based on the Freemasons and was known more for having a mysterious secret society hierarchy as opposed to the liberal values it celebrated. The Order of Illuminati, as it was also known, was entrenched in mysterious rituals and followed a structure that mirrored (or mocked, I suppose) organised religion.

The Bavarian Illuminati were outlawed in the mid-1780s in one of the many attacks on groups spreading such anti-clerical and anti-monarchy values. But the final blows to the Bavarian Illuminati were in 1787 when the bloke that set it all up - Adam Weishaupt - ran for the hills and the group's internal documents were published.

According to the conspiracy theory, the history of the Illuminati goes as far as the present day. You can’t check the comments of a Beyoncé ‘gram post without curious claims detailing how Mrs Carter is hell-bent on bringing in a global, tyrannical government via persuasive beats and catchy lyrics.

But the history of the Illuminati goes a lot further and deeper than first appears.

A Brief History Of The Illuminati

Before Adam Weisphaut brought together his besties to take down Christian hegemony in Western Europe, a number of different groups were inspired by the metaphorical concept of Illumination. There were the Alumbrados of Spain - a movement of the 16th century - which claimed the human soul could enter communication with the Holy Spirit, the most notable member of which believing she could converse with Jesus and the Virgin Mary. And then there were the Illuminés of France who were militant defenders against the prosecution of Protestants.

The light of God illuminated many. But in the same year that the Americans split off from the British Empire, Adam Weisphaut came together with other republicans to celebrate the Illumination of reason. Effectively, they created a religion that worshipped this. They followed Jesuit lines to formulate their structure, and Weisphaut started to recruit his students. He then looked further afield, moving on to other German cities for more young, wealthy, and intelligent men of social importance.

It soon grew to major European countries including France, Italy, and Poland. But it is estimated that it never breached the 2000 member mark. This membership was constantly put under strain by internal conflict and the edict of 1785 finally banned their existence. It wasn’t long after this that Weisphaut was put behind bars and the Illuminati (we can only assume) disbanded.

And yet, only 4 years later, rumours of the group leveraging their secretive power to control global events were being whispered through the alleyways of Paris. Mhmm, the French Revolution was tied down to the no-longer-officially-existing Illuminati. It was the first of many events linked to their mysterious master plan.

In 1797, Augustin Barruel produced Memoirs Illustrating the History of Jacobinism. This was the first book detailing the theory that the Illuminati had survived persecution and used their power to cause the entire French Revolution.

If you aren’t an academic like me *hair flip*, this was one of the most significant moments in history. It heralded a new era - the modern era. From the get-go of the Illuminati conspiracy theory, it was tied to a moment of significant social and political change. And, much like the other events they were attributed to, it shaped our world.

John Robisons’s Proofs of a Conspiracy (1798) followed up this theory, as did several other books confirming that the conspiracy was not going anywhere. It wouldn’t be long before these theories took hold over in the US. And there they entered political discourse.

Yep, 200 years ago, American presidential candidates were chatting sh*t ‘bout the Illuminati. Anxiety regarding slavery rebellions and migration from areas like the Caribbean fuelled fears about this group of conspirators, mirroring the way other theories take hold.

Since the Bavarian Illuminati was disbanded, every major historical event that followed in its wake was pinned on them. Every moment that shaped modernity up until now is associated in some way with a small group that barely managed to amass 2k followers.

You ain't getting on Love Island with that.

For 160 years the Illuminati were mentioned here and there.

But it was in the 1960s that a group of pranksters in adoration of a fake religious text, Principia Discordia, started sending letters to Playboy claiming to be part of the Illuminati. And then, in the following decade, Robert Anton Wilson’s The Illuminatus Trilogy hit the shops and immortalised the legacy of the countercultural meme. Banking on the hippie, fuck-the-system vibe, it mixed the actual history of the Bavarian Illuminati with fantasy tropes. Fact and fiction became muddled and then fused with the surging tide of conspiracy theories during the thick of the Cold War. It gave a new lease of life to something that in reality probably died a long, long time ago.

As the Cold War ended, the theory evolved yet again: this time, there was a belief that this secret group was puppeteering these new events by championing a New World Order.

And so, we arrive at the present day.

The 5 Most Famous Theories About The Illuminati

Confession time.

No, I’m not part of the Illuminati.

I actually found it really difficult to find any specific theories about the Illuminati. That’s because followers of the theory believe everything is controlled by the secret society. But I gathered together a few of the prominent claims that weave closely with the theory that a New World Order is in the making.

#1 - The US Presidents were in on it

Take any conspiracy theory - no, any conspiracy theory - and you can bet every US president is supposedly linked to it. They’re all the antichrist, they all eat aborted fetuses, and some of them were even involved in staged terrorist attacks.

But the first president to be pinned to the secret society was Thomas Jefferson. I’ve already mentioned that the 1800 election was influenced by beliefs regarding the theory, but his opposition quite literally claimed he was part of an evil secret society.

220 years later and it looks like our political tactics haven’t moved on.

The role of the Eye of Providence on the dollar bill only stoked the fire. If it is linked to a secret society, it is most likely to refer to a Masonic symbol as many of the presidents were Freemasons.

#2 - They were in on the Battle of Waterloo

The Napoleonic Wars, like most battles, were destructive. Dead men fell before the Emperor of France. From 1800 to 1815, various wars surged across Europe - and all were supposedly initiated by the Illuminati to weaken the governments of Europe.

One of the results of these wars and the eventual exile of Napoleon was the Congress of Vienna (the 19th century version of a European UN).

It aimed to bring long-term peace to Europe and redrew state lines in an open discussion with European leaders. It was, in simple terms, a Europe-wide government. It played directly into the alleged desires of the Illuminati: that notion of a global government.

#3 - They wrote the Communist Manifesto

Move over Karl Marx.

According to some, after Vienna they then took control of the European economy via communist thought. But they didn’t just influence Marx’s most famous thesis: they also directed Karl Ritter’s oppositional piece, taking control of both sides of the debate.

Some allege that by having control of both sides of the argument, they could divide the human race into separate camps and have their wicked ways with the world.

*villain laugh*

#4 - They orchestrated both world wars

So.

The Illuminati have control of the European politicians and the European economy. Now it's time to destroy both.

After they collabed with Karl Marx, they swiftly started drawing up plans to spark three world wars in the 20th century and create a worldwide government as the millenium came.

*looks around*

*shrugs*

In WW1, theorists claim their aim was to squash Tsarism in Russia and make this vast nation the home of communism. But this was more personal than political - Russia prevented the end of the Napoleonic Wars bringing in their desired one-world government.

They then set about bringing in WW2. This time, they wanted to use fascists and the forces opposing them to strengthen international communism until it was ready to be pitted against Christendom.

But their plans don’t stop there.

#5 - They’re planning a Third World War

Apparently, the Illuminati planned a third world war to occur between political Zionists and the Muslim world. This alleged battle was to force the international community to form a one world government.

Whether these plans have been delayed or simply didn’t go down as thought, ultimately they seem to have failed.

Who Is Part Of The Illuminati (Allegedly)?

A number of famous musicians believed to be spreading Illuminati music by chart-topping hits are supposedly members of the group. Are we being brainwashed by these famous faces?

Jay-Z

Beyonce

Madonna

Lindsay Lohan

Rihanna

Prince

Michael Jackson

Lady Gaga

23% of American voters believe the Illuminati exists. Do you?

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