Q: I’ve been picking scabs and my nails for as long as i can remember, but recently it's got so much work and i can't stop myself from picking the skin around my fingers, especially my thumbs so my thumbs are almost always bleeding, is this dermotillomania? i hate it and i want to stop, i do it without realizing I’m doing it and i hate myself for it
Hey there, thanks for reaching out! Although I am not a doctor and I can’t confirm that you do or do not have Dermatillomania I personally think that this does in fact sound like you are dealing with Derma (excoriation, or skin picking disorder).
If you look at the TLC Foundation’s page about derma, you will see that derma “is characterized by the repetitive picking of one’s own skin. Individuals who struggle with this disorder touch, rub, scratch, pick at, or dig into their skin in an attempt to improve perceived imperfections, often resulting in tissue damage, discoloration, or scarring.”
So I think it’s safe to say that this is what we are dealing with. Personally, I tend to pick exclusively on my face, arms and back so while I can’t personally give advice on picking at your fingers I can tell you what hasn’t and hasn’t worked for my friend (he also picks at his fingers, mostly his thumbs, to the point to which they bleed) and I.
1. First, I’m not sure of your gender or your thoughts about getting fake nails but personally acrylic and or gel nails make a huge difference in picking for me (and I’ve heard this from others as well). It has to do with the length or the thickness of the fake nail that makes it significantly harder to pick at the skin. Because your natural nails are pretty thin and kind of sharp they make it much easier to get under scabs and other “imperfections” on your hands like your cuticles. It might also be worthwhile if you don’t want longer nails to try just getting gel nails that make your nature nail a little thicker than they actually are.
2. Another thing that I might suggest is using a barrier to prevent you from being able to pick at your skin. When you have an annoyance on your nails maybe try putting a band aid on the area of your skin that you are having an issue with just until you get over the urge to pick or a band aid with some Neosporin to allow the area to heal. From what I know about having derma and specifically picking at nails it usually starts when you see or feel something that is an imperfection and you want to pick at it, it might also be beneficial to use a Finger Cot on the areas that are bothering you or when you feel the urge to pick at your skin.
3. Going to get a manicure would be a great way to help your finger picking. I’ve noticed that when my friend uses a tool like nail clippers or those small manicure scissors to cut off hang nails or extra dead skin he is less likely to pick. Either doing that yourself or going to get a manicure where they will do that for you, tend to your cuticles, and moisturize your hands would be a great thing to try out if you are wanting to decrease your picking.
Lastly, let me just say you should not hate yourself for doing this. All of us with BFRBs understand what you are going through and we definitely understand how you feel. I’ve had many an instance where I’ve absolutely hated myself for pulling all my eyebrows out or picking at all the scabs on my face and causing scars, but I had to learn to realize that this isn’t just a habit that I’m dealing with. I can tell myself over and over that I shouldn’t do something and take preventative measures against pulling or picking but hating myself and feeling negative only makes things worse, as these disorders are not easily controlled. The sooner you start to embrace and feel positive about derma the better you will start to feel. You’re probably thinking that’s CRAZY how can I feel positive about something like this? As insane as it might seem I started feeling positive and better about my trich and derma when I started connecting, talking and even meeting up with others with the disorder. I might suggest seeking out a support group in your area and that was something that helped me greatly!
I hope that some of these suggestions with help you, and keep your head up! Things will get better! If you ever need to talk with anyone please feel free to write to us again! <3 Link to the same post on Trichs-N-Picks Link to the Trichs-N-Picks Main Page