❝ i know for a fact that you're special. i can feel it. ❞ // wankyun x billie
feeling destined to accomplish something is one thing, but actually succeeding at it it's another. how many people get to do what they were born to? how many people even get to know what that is? there is luck envolved, of course, but most of it comes from hard work and opportunity. not only billie was lucky but he also put in the effort and took every change he could get. it was not because he believed in himself, but because he should prove right the people who did.
to be here, in his own apartment with the person that he loved was already itself a chance of luck. to be privileged to be yourself, is probably the highest forms of gratifications one person can get. and wankyun makes him feel that. his family makes him feel that. his friends, his fans, everyone around him. if he can be special, if he can be good, happy or even anything ever is because he had that. he hand stretched his way made not only a path but forged the person he became, someone that he is proud to be.
regardless, the words wet his eyes in the same way they do whenever he thinks back to the little fragile boy he once was, the one who snuggled up to wankyun in the thin layer of the blanket during the night hoping for the warmth they barely had, grasping for the innocence still left in them, dreaming of hopeful days where they could be the people they believed in themselves to be. many turns later, billie cries whenever he thinks of the fact that they did indeed, despite the ups and lows, the turns and twists. it's another of one the thinks to not just be grateful about but to praise everyday. "thank you, i was lucky." he says honestly, pinching the bridge of his best friend's nose.
back then, was something he couldn't grasp and surviving it meant everything. now, when life finally fits, when breathing feels easier than it ever did. every version of himself that stumbled, doubted, endured and every one of them was meant to be seen and loved by wankyun. to have been here after all is its own kind of luck. to have been loved through becoming is something he treasures even more. if billie is here — if he is whole, and soft, and granted all this happiness — it's because wankyun is still here to and on the receiving end to have and be the same. not just the person both of them are now, but the boy they once were, the in-between versions that didn’t yet know they would make it.
“let me say this, though,” billie begins, eyes warm, steady. “you were always special, too.”
he was was always too precious to billie, above every single thing he put wankyun and most times to the disbelief of his friends. no one would ever get what made their connection so profound, but it was clear for him. it was always in the way they were able to see each other and love without conditions or a spectacle. wankyun became a part of him and taught him what love is by simply existing and being there. so when billie looks at him, he knows like nobody else do. if he himself became something good, something worth loving, it is because wankyun always was. because he saw him first. because he still does.
