Feb 29, 2024
A SECOND CHAPTER OF MOTHER KACCHAN IS HEREEE
An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works
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A SECOND CHAPTER OF MOTHER KACCHAN IS HEREEE
An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works
Hitman!Katsuki accepting a 50 cent hit when he saw that the target was his childhood friend (to protect him) and Izuku feeling betrayed at the fact that Katsuki didn’t even ask for an increase😭
katsuki and izuku are doing homework together in katsuki’s dorm room and out of the blue katsuki goes, “my parents think we’re dating” how does izuku react/response?
I'm too tired to come up with something angsty so have some crack lol
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _
Izuku (being Izuku) immediately chokes on whatever he's eating/drinking (and even if there's nothing in his mouth, he chokes on his own spit) and blushes HARD. He asks Katsuki what brought his parents to that conclusion, to which Katsuki gives a shit-eating grin and goes "I'm glad you asked" and proceeds to open up a PowerPoint titled "Reasons Why My Parents Think We're Dating". The presentation is 36 slides long, and a good third of them are just times where Izuku is caught on camera shamelessly staring at Katsuki with a completely lovestruck look in his eyes and a soft, smitten smile. The final slide of the PowerPoint says "in conclusion, you're a simp. now kiss me."
(Katsuki proceeded to re-present this PowerPoint at their wedding, except there's 269 slides this time around)
PATREON PREVIEW: Pikachu Never F*cking Learns, Ch. 2
READ CHAPTER 1 ON Ao3
Unseasonably warm days were a hazard, and Izuku knew it. He'd seen it countless times, but the people they'd grown up with had learned not to get near Katsuki during unseasonable weather alongside him, so he'd never had to warn anyone about it before.
That was about to change.
The forecast this morning had said that it would be cold—cold enough that Katsuki (who hated the cold) would be wrapping himself in a scarf and stuffing his hands into gloves. He'd also probably be cranky, but that wasn't exactly a divergence from the norm.
Sure enough, Katsuki was the last person to trudge into the common room, bundled tightly in his scarf and glaring as though the world had personally offended him. His uniform looked bulkier than normal, so Izuku guessed that he'd probably donned a few undershirts as well.
"Morning, Kacchan," Izuku greeted him. He was pouring coffee into a travel mug. "Want some?"
Katsuki glared at him for a long moment, but Izuku just waited. Cold weather cranky was a different breed of cranky. Eventually, Katsuki's shoulders slumped. "Yeah."
Izuku fished another travel mug out of the cupboard, filling it with coffee. "You take it black too, right?"
"Hnn."
"Here you go! Mind if I walk to class with you?"
"Hnn."
READ CHAPTER 1 ON Ao3
The rest of this chapter is already posted on my Patreon! Patreon fics will be posted one month before they're released on Ao3. Read it here!
GOOD DAY KIND SIRS I HAVE CRACK
An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO MY BELOVED WIFE @nebuloustar
An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works
Midoriya barged into Hitoshi's dorm room, completely panicked and spiraling to the point that Hitoshi could barely understand his mumbling. It took Hitoshi brainwashing Midoriya and instructing him to calm down to get him back down to Earth, to which he looked up at Hitoshi with shock-filled eyes as he said, "I'm in love with Kacchan." Hitoshi thought he'd gotten better at all this friendship stuff, but apparently, saying, "Congratulations on being the last to realize," in response wasn't the right answer. On top of that, it turns out that suggesting for him to confess his feelings also wasn't the right answer. Ha. Who knew?
ShinDeku friendship, Deku gay rambling about Kacchan, and a little bit of brainwashing pixie dust :))
ask game -
it's pyjama day at ua. bkdk show up wearing the same subtly nerdy all might pyjamas. all might forces them to take a picture together at the end of the day, eventually becoming both of their lockscreens
OOOOOOOOO, interesting interesting
Pajama day for Class 1-A isn't anything unusual. After all, they see each other in the dorms wearing pajamas all the time. So, as per Mina's suggestion, they all show up to school in pajama day in hero-inspired pajamas.
Todoroki misunderstood the instructions and showed up to class wearing the Shoto pajamas that had come out earlier that summer. Kaminari showed up in Present Mic-inspired pajamas, even going as far as styling his hair similarly and poorly drawing on a mustache. Kirishima, naturally, showed up in Crimson Riot pajamas, giving everyone in class a Crimson Riot sticker. Where did he get them from (seeing as they're not official Crimson Riot merchandise)? Why does he have so many? How did they all fit in his pockets? Nobody knows. Shinso unknowingly matched with Kaminari in a way, showing up to class in Eraserhead-themed pajamas (a black turtleneck pajama and black sweatpants) and the dorm coffee kettle. When Katsuki walked into class, there was a collective sigh of defeat. Mina scolds him for not wearing a hero-inspired pajama, to which Katsuki responds with a "fuck off, Pinky." His pajama was one the class has seen every now and then: a black sleeveless tank top with striped pants, colored black, white, yellow, red, and blue. "Good morning everyone!" Everyone recognizes the voice instantly, heads snapping towards the door, wondering how far Izuku went with the-- The class collectively blinks twice. Izuku was wearing...Katsuki's pajama? "Deku-kun," Uraraka starts, breaking the silence. "Didn't you get the message in the group chat?" Izuku blinks twice, clearly confused. "Uh, yeah, I think so. It was about pajama day, right?" he asks, pulling out his phone. "Guys, I have a great idea. For pajama day tomorrow, how bout we all wear hero-inspired pajamas?" He glances up from his phone. "And then there's a bunch of people agreeing. Did I miss something?" Mina frowns. Izuku didn't miss anything in the group chat. "No, you didn't," Uraraka says. "I guess we're all just surprised that you didn't wear something that...stands out more." "Oh!" Izuku's eyes light up the way they usually do when he's about to talk about heroes. "This is official All Might merchandise, actually! It came out as a limited edition set last summer. There were only 25,000 of these sold in Japan. I almost wasn't able to get them!" Mina's eyes widen and snap towards Katsuki, whose face was glued to his phone, ears sporting a bright crimson flush. "Blasty! I didn't know you were such an All Might fanboy like Mido," she teases, wiggling her eyebrows when he makes eye contact with her. "You have it too, Kacchan?!" Izuku exclaims, rushing over towards him. "That's so cool, we're matching!" Katsuki doesn't meet Izuku's eyes for long. "Yeah, I guess," he mumbles out, fingers absently tapping at his desk. Before Izuku could say anything else, Aizawa walks into class and they all take their seats. Mina doesn't miss the way Katsuki's ears and neck remain a rosy hue for the rest of class, while Izuku keeps glancing over from the chalkboard to Katsuki's back, a soft, fond smile on his face.
Katsuki coming home after an extended shift to Izuku "cooking"
"How tall do you think Bakugou is-" "Five feet eight inches and three quarters." "..."
Planking competition Lmaoooo
"Don't you 'Kacchan' me you little shit."
You by no means have to do all of these! Just lot I'd put a bunch since the brainrot is strong atm lol :P
*cracks knuckles*
my bitches, those i adore, and my non-binary whores-
WELCOME TO THE SHOW, KEEP YOUR HANDS AND FEET IN THE RIDE AT ALL TIMES, AND ENJOY.
1. Katsuki coming home after an extended shift to Izuku "cooking"
so katsuki had to pull a double shift at the agency because it was one of those days where villains wouldn't take a fucking rest. he's exhausted and tired and he wants nothin more than warm food and to soak in the bath and sleep for 14 consecutive hours straight.
as soon as katsuki opens the door all he can smell is culinary death. the air itself tasted like pure fucking charcoal. it's like someone made it into a candle and lit it up. and so, katsuki handles it in the most civilized way possible (/s):
"WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT SMELL DEKU."
and izuku. oh precious precious izuku, he comes out of the kitchen wearing a "kiss the chef" apron, and he has the most defeated look on his face. if katsuki looks hard enough he'll be able to see tears about to fall out.
izuku then explains that he knew how tired katsuki would be after his shift, so he texted mitsuki and asked her to send him her spicy beef curry recipe so he could surprise katsuki with it.
long story short, izuku almost set a lot of things on fire. in the end, izuku gave up on the curry and opened the windows to try and air out the smell. when that didn't help that much, he grabbed all the candles in the house and lined them up on the counter and was starting to light them all up so it could cover up the smell as katsuki walked in.
katsuki then understands that izuku genuinely did his best to make something himself to give to katsuki, and how disappointed he was that the plan failed.
and so, katsuki throws a coat at izuku and tells him "get some fucking shoes on already". izuku is confused but listens, and he takes the apron off, puts his coat and shoes on, and walks out with katsuki. they go the closest supermarket, and katsuki tells izuku to get their favorite ramen cup flavors. katsuki gets a quart of mint chocolate ice cream and when they get home katsuki makes izuku put the apron back on, helps him light up the rest of the candles, then pulls up a three minute "instant ramen with egg" recipe on youtube and tells izuku to make it.
thankfully, izuku manages to make both their ramens successfully and brings them to the dining table, where katsuki's already waiting. izuku apologizes again for making a mess and for not cooking anything worthwhile. katsuki shoves a forkful of ramen into izuku's mouth and says some sappy shit along the lines of "as long as it's you, i'm happy", and izuku tears up again. before he can open his mouth, katsuki gives him a quick but deep kiss. flustered izuku tries to talk but gets interrupted by katsuki, who points down to izuku's apron and said "the apron said to kiss the chef. im just following the rules".
2. "How tall do you think Bakugou is-" "Five feet eight inches and three quarters." "..."
izuku knows SO MUCH excessively useless information and trivia about katsuki that katsuki decides that he's going to make a point so izuku can't ever complain again when katsuki jokingly calls him a stalker.
katsuki's agency sets up a "pro hero trivia night", where fans all pile into a stadium and basically play kahoot with questions about katsuki. the agency explicitly says that this event isn't for other pro heroes, since they already know katsuki well.
izuku (being izuku) decides that there's no way he's gonna let some fan show him up on their knowledge of his kacchan, so he goes undercover and sneaks into the stadium and this man is fucking KILLING IT. there's not a single question that he gets wrong and his reaction times are stupid fast.
as the questions keep coming though, they become things that there's no way for the fans to know (what hospital katsuki was born in, what he likes to set the thermostat on, super specific pet peeves, etc) and izuku is unfazed. the man is on a mission to prove that he knows kacchan best and he does.
the final question in the kahoot is "what is the exact date and time that dynamight proposed to his partner" and people go crazy because the media's never mentioned anything about dynamight being taken? and izuku is like "thats fucking ridiculous he hasn't proposed to me yet" and picks "none of the above" except that its wrong and izuku lowkey panics because he's so confused? until he looks up and finds that the stadium camera is displaying him on the screen and because izuku is horrible as disguising himself when he's alone, almost everyone recognizes him as deku immediately. before he can get swarmed by fans, katsuki flies over the crowd and grabs izuku, then brings him down to the stage that katsuki was standing in. izuku then decides that now is the perfect time to tell katsuki that he accidentally messed up the last question, and katsuki gives him the biggest smirk in the world and goes "did i?" and then he gets down on one knee and pulls out a ring and the entire stadium fucking LOSES it, and after izuku says yes, the date is saturday, september 13, and the time is 9:07, which was one of the kahoot answers.
3. Planking competition Lmaoooo
it starts off as an innocent thing, izuku mentions that he won against kirishima in a planking contest and got free boba, and so katsuki decides that this is a fucking challenge and makes a bet with izuku: four rounds, best out of four wins, and the loser has to do whatever the winner wants. izuku agrees.
and so, they start the first round.....and it ends in a tie after four and a half minutes. izuku suggests that they put a two minute limit and that if it passes that time and they're still both up, they count it as a tie. katsuki agrees. the score is 0 - 0.
they start the second round, and......another tie. 0 - 0.
third round comes and goes....another tie. 0 - 0.
the fourth round starts, and they're both going strong....until katsuki starts moving while in his planking position, until he's planking with izuku between him and the floor. izuku is flustered but not enough to lose....until katsuki starts grinding down on him with his hips.
izuku immediately drops to the floor and starts to crawl out from underneath katsuki, except katsuki decides to suddenly drop all his weight onto izuku, completely squishing him. izuku yells and curses and calls katsuki a menace, but as soon as katsuki turns izuku so that he's facing him and kisses him, izuku stops complaining.
katsuki then immediately reminds izuku that he won and tells izuku to show him the drawings of him his friends kept talking about (damn you shoto, running your mouth obliviously).
4. "Don't you 'Kacchan' me you little shit."
ah, what a wonderful day. the sun is shining, the birds are singing, and izuku is in the hospital because he was reckless. again. nothing new or surprising, but now that him and katsuki are dating, he has to deal with a very angry pomeranian when he wakes up.
katsuki is yelling and cursing and izuku knows that katsuki is worried and that this is how he's expressing his concern, but all he wants right now is kisses from his boyfriend.
so, he flashes his softest, gentlest, most loving and adoring smile, and goes, "i love you, kacchan."
katsuki's immediate reaction is to stop yelling and go, "ah. i love you too."
silence, and izuku is about to ask for a kiss-
"DON'T YOU FUCKING 'KACCHAN' ME YOU LITTLE SHIT, I'M NOT DONE WITH YOU," and katsuki proceeds to yell and lecture some more.
izuku sighs. "dang, i really thought that was gonna work."
its ok though, because at the end of the day izuku got all the kisses and cuddles his heart could desire because katsuki can't handle being mad at izuku for more than 20 minutes