On my way to Toronto I came to Sudbury. At first it was a strange encounter with only a nickel mine and a huge science center to enrich my afternoon. But then I gradually fell in love with this little town 400 Kilometers north of Toronto. It is small enough to be easily accessible, but there are things going on up here.
The cityscape boasts a large variety of murals and an annual independent art and music festival that just unraveled itself in front of me for the start of a good weekend. On the other hand Sudbury seems to be a turning point in my travel. I have completed an epic road trip across this beautiful country. I’ve come a long way, baby. The next stop in Toronto will hold a meeting with an old friend from Stuttgart that comes to visit me for a week.
I am stumbling about the next steps. Will I sell the van after that yet? Start a new more serious photographic project with the goal to finally publish something or just enjoy the life of a backpacker on the beaches of this world for a few more months before the reality sets back in? So many options and yet I have to take a decision.
I truly enjoyed the freedom and vastness of Canada. This could be a country to live in. The weather might not be optimal but the people are liberal and friendly enough to compensate for all this flaws. Nature-wise it has it all.
One thing became more and more clear to me during the last 2 weeks. Whenever I am with someone it is an option to outdo what everybody else is doing. Be more extreme, more adventurous, more knowledgeable or show more endurance. This used to be a huge part of my identity. But when it comes down to being all by myself I start to feel a new dimension of this. Could I be striving for all these achievements to mask my own fear of being insufficient? Am I fearful that nobody would accept me with all my flaws when I’d stop to outdo everyone else all the time? Or would that result in a more approachable and accessible me? New impressions and interesting thoughts that came up by living out of my comfort zone.
I think being all by myself in this somehow distant but yet lovely small town provoked more thoughts than I would have expected it to. This is not the end. But it sure is a turning point.
