Written for the @pixelcafe-network Friday Challenge #5
It’s strangely easy to pack your bags. It should be harder you reckon- you can still remember moving into his apartment. Putting your stuff away, tucking in pieces of yourself into pieces of him. The mixing of yours and his becoming ours.
A sort of languid sadness has been settled in your bones for the past three days but has contorted, and hardened into anger. Or maybe it has sucked up any other emotion you might have felt towards him, chewed it up, and left you void of feeling. Apathy. That’s what you’re feeling.
The sweaters take up the most room so you pull them out and put them into one of those vacuum bags to shrink them down. Some things are too big in the compress cubes, so vacuum bags. Stuff them full, zip them up, suck the air out, and hope you haven’t shoved too much down that it doesn’t burst at the seams.
That’s the point you were at. Too much shoving things down, down, down, that they melted under pressure and now you felt like a volcano about to burst when you first saw the lipstick on the collar of his shirt. It erupted out of you in a screaming match with him that resulted in him leaving the apartment, telling you to “cool off.”
But again it’s no longer anger, that burned out after the first night. Now it was just apathy.
Apathy to how easy it was for him to continually lie to you. Apathy to how he always promised change. Apathy to how you’d take one step forward and five steps back with him. Apathy to how everyone looked at you with pity. Apathy for how much you’ve struggled to try and change yourself to better fit his tastes again.
Apathy.
Apathy.
Apathy.
You supposed it’s better this way, stops the cutting edge of the knife of failure from stabbing too deeply.
“You actually leaving?” Shoei has just come into the apartment, still wearing his coat with a dozen roses bunched up in his arm. His version of an apology you suppose. You don’t even like roses.
“Yes. I am.”
He leans against the door frame and scratches the back of his neck with his free hand. “That’s what you said last time.”
“This time I mean it.”
“Sure you do.” It's careless, light, dismissive, the same way he’s always brushes it off. It's impressive how he always does that. It’s depressing that he treats you like this.
You slam the suitcase shut. “I do.”
Shoei comes up behind you and wraps his arms around your waist. Surprising, just how much has changed in the past six months. You never thought that him touching you would make you feel disgusted when it used to feel like home. “Let me make it up to you.” He punctuates each word with a kiss on your neck and it makes you squirm.
How many other women has he kissed the same way?
“Don’t touch me.” You slide out of his arms and yank the suitcase from the bed.
“C’mon, doll, why are you acting like this? Let me make it up to you.” He scoffs as you shrug him off again. The mask slips just a bit and you can see his complete disregard, how he really isn’t sorry for what he’s done. “Jesus okay I’m sorry, it was an honest mistake. I was drunk and she looked like you. Tell me what I need to do to make it up to you?”
“No Sho, there’s not making it up to me. I’m done this time. For real.” It sounds like it doesn’t come from your body. Like it’s an outside source talking. So final.
“You said that last time. And the time before that.” There's anger brewing in him with the sharp draw of his brown and how his voice picks up in volume, how it gets sharper. “Reality is you’ll come back here crawling, crying, telling me you’re sorry, I’ll forgive you, and then we fuck and were good for a couple of months. Why don’t we just skip the drama, get to fucking, and then go to breakfast? I’ll even buy you those new earrings you’ve been eyeing.”
You don’t move but your shoulders tense. How many times have you done this dance with him to where he thinks it's okay to talk to you like this now? Where is your self-respect? But he’s not wrong. Every time you did come back on your knees and beg for him to love you again.
“Hate me all you want. You know I’m right.” He’s behind you again, wrapping his arms around you and kissing your head like he always has.
“No,” You pull forward, unlock the door and open it. “Not this time.”
nagi seishiro is the laziest motherfucker known to existence.
sometimes he simply doesn’t have the energy to take care of himself and you. so sometimes, he’ll slither over to you while your sprawled out on the bed playing on the switch, and ask:
“baby, can i please use you? i promise i won’t bother you, just keep playing your game.”
all nagi wants is to lie with his face buried in your pussy.
it’s really not a big ask. he wouldn’t be bothering you anyway, so of course you’ll oblige. of course you’ll slide your shorts off for him and lay back so he can flatten himself out the mattress with his head between your thighs.
nagi can’t even be bothered to hold his head up properly. his cheek rests on your thigh as he languidly makes out with your pussy, mouth and chin covered in your sticky slick.
as hard as it might be to believe, he was rutting his hips into the mattress at an even more lethargic pace than he was roving his tongue up and down your cunt. you could barely even tell he was doing it. not until 30 minutes in when nagi humped the mattress once, twice, three times and caught his aching cock just right, blowing his load straight into his shorts. he groaned so loud, so deliciously, that you had to finally glance down at him, and what a sight it was.
he's trembling ever so slightly, chest heaving and still coming down from his long, drawn out orgasm. he’s got this delirious smile plastered across his face, cheeks and chin covered in your sticky essence that’s glistening under the light. it smears across your skin when he crawls up and collapses on your stomach, too tired to move any further despite not having moved an inch the whole time.
For Tokimitsu's Birthday, here's a best friend Toki comfort scenario!
Masterlist
Imagine being at a sleepover with your best friend Tokimitsu.
You wake up in the middle of the night. Drenched in sweat. You had an awful nightmare.
Your heavy breathing makes Tokimitsu wake up as well, as soon as he notices something's wrong he pulls you into a hug and starts comforting you. He's not good at keeping his own anxiety down, but he knows many ways how to calm down when anxious, which he uses to help you calm down.
He holds you for as long as you need and comforts you until you're calm enough to go back to sleep.
He lets you vent about the nightmare you just had and tries to reassure you how that was just a nightmare and nothing in reality.
He speaks in such a soft voice, it makes you feel so safe and comforted.
