"Few delights can equal the presence of one whom we trust utterly."
Second attempt at Bonehatter's Crystal Infection AU This one's a bit more angsty and sad, but I hope you guys still like it!
How they had found this place, no one was really sure. But it was deserted and only slightly dilapidated and it was the best they could do for the night. All the bedrooms were upstairs and a large living room with a fireplace was situated in close proximity to the kitchen. A large wooden staircase leading to the upstairs area was the first thing that caught Lar’s eye, as Steven, Pearl, and Sadie hurried out from the rain.
“Alright, how are we splitting up the rooms?”
“Pearl, with all due respect, I think you, the kids, and Sadie and Lars should split up the rooms. I’ll sleep on the couch.”
“That’s very nice of you, Greg. Okay, so Steven, Peedee, and Connie get the master bedroom, Lars and Sadie get the guest bedroom, and I’ll take whatever’s left.”
“Sounds good,” everyone said in unison. As the kids explored the house, the adults helped bring essentials in to the house. The rain did not let up, and by the time everything had been recovered from the van, Sadie looked as if the rain had physically beaten her. Lars was upstairs working on maps and logging journal entries when Sadie made it into the room. She was soaked and sluggish, barely being able to move her feet enough to reach the bed. As she sat down, several assorted bones in her body cracked and Sadie fell back on the cushion.
“Hurting?”
“My bruises have bruises and I can’t feel anything.”
“Come here.” Sadie rolled over so that her head rested on Lar’s thigh. “You’re soaked.”
“And next on, ‘Help! My friend is painfully obvious!’ Lars will talk about how the sun goes down at night and comes back up during the day.”
“You’re going to catch hypothermia if you keep those clothes on any longer.”
“What are you suggesting Skywalker?”
“Can you move your arms?”
“Not a chance.”
“Let me help you.”
Lars reached for the side of the bed and stood over Sadie. He placed his hands on her shoulders so he wouldn’t strain her arm muscles and pulled her up. There was a large wet imprint from where Sadie had rolled around, but Lars was focused on his friend.
“What’s the plan,” Sadie asked. Lars reached for the ends of Sadie’s t-shirt, but Sadie followed suit. “What are you doing?”
“You said you were sore and couldn’t move your arms.”
“So?”
Lars lifted her arms in a retreating stance. “I was just trying to help, Sades. I’m not trying anything. You worked really hard today, and I just want you to relax. But if you want to do it yourself, that’s fine-“
“I’m sorry,” Sadie interrupted, “I’m just tired and my reflexes are out of whack. I’d love some help to be honest.”
Lars reached for her shirt again and pulled upward. Her shirt was slickly stuck to her and peeled off like an old set of skin. He was careful not to catch her head the wrong way in the neck. Her hair was only slightly damp but her body shined with specks of water. Sadie only had one bra, and this was the first time Lars had seen it. It was navy with light blue polka dots on it with a matching bow where the cups met. Her body had gained a bit of muscle in their months on the road, but she still had a little stomach pudge. Lars thought it was cute.
“Should I….?”
“Go for it, Big Guy.” Lars knelt down on one knee and reached for the button to Sadie’s wet jeans. Undoing them were easy, taking them off was another story. Lars had to tug to detach them from her hips but after a few seconds they managed to peel off as well. Her underwear was the same color as the polka dots on her bra. Lars smiled to himself. “Thank you,” Sadie said.
“You’re welcome. I’ll hang these up.” Lars walked over to the window and placed them on the sill. As he walked back, he removed the plaid shirt resting on his shoulders and draped it over hers. “Because it’s probably going to get cold tonight.” Sadie fit her arms into the holes and watched Lars as he buttoned the shirt up. Lars made sure to not linger or accidentally invade her privacy. As he finished, he stood back to examine his work. The shirt was larger on Sadie than he had expected and she recognized her cue to spin and model for her friend. Lars laughed, “Come on.” They both got into bed and Lars began to rub her shoulders.
“What’s got you so generous tonight,” she asked.
“I told you. You worked hard and I want to help you relax.” Lars continued to knead at her muscles. “You’re really tense.”
“Sorry.”
“No it’s fine.”
They sat there for an extended amount of time. Sadie sat patiently while Lars did his job. He was very gentle with his hands and they were surprisingly soft. The cold metal feeling of his prosthetic had faded away from when he had first touched her and was now warm and inviting.
“Lars.”
“Yeah?”
“Can I…ask you something?”
“Anything.”
“If there ever comes a time..that…”
Lars was immediately aware of what Sadie was about to ask. He placed both hands on her shoulders and pleaded, “Please don’t Sadie.”
“I know things are eventually going to happen and I want to make sure I’m clear.”
“Not now. You’re calm right now. There’s no need to bring it u-“
“I just want to know that…”
“Please stop.”
“If I ever…”
“Don’t.”
“If I ever get sick, you’ll take care of it.”
She didn’t mean just any kind of sickness. She was thinking of a specific illness.
“Sadie, I can’t promise you anything.”
“But you can try, can’t you?”
“I’m not doing it.”
“Please, for me Lars.”
“Sadie stop.”
Sadie turned around so that she could look Lars in the eyes. “We all know what is ultimately going to happen. I just want to know that if I get infected, you will be the one to put me out of my misery.”
Lars reached for her so that his hands cradled her head and his thumbs rested neatly in front of her ears. His movements were slow and succinct and when he kissed her, Lars felt whole for the first time in what seemed like a millennia. He pulled her close and Sadie found his neck and held him. It was similar to a blackout. Sadie could not tell where she was, or barely what was happening, but she knew Lars was there and that’s all she needed. Lars left her lips slowly and watched her shudder at the absence of him. His hands still cradled her head so he could get his point across, but also because he didn’t want to leave her.
“If there is anything I can’t do it is sit around and let you fall victim to this cruel world. It has taken so much away from us already; I won’t allow anything else to slip through my fingers. You are the ever burning light in the dark pit that is my soul. I wish I could give you whatever you want, but all I can promise you is slight protection. But with that protection I can promise you that none of us will ever fall victim to this hell. I will make sure of that because I know it will make you happy. I still have nightmares; nightmares that manifest even the deepest parts of my brain. They involve just what you talked about, so if it’s going to be mentioned, I’d rather it stay in my dreams. You will never feel alone because I am never going to leave your side. You have become a part of me and I intend for it to stay that way. We are partners and that’s never going to change.”
Lars pulled her down to lay on the bed so that Sadie’s head could rest on his shoulder. His hand ran through her hair aimlessly.
“I’m so proud of you,” Sadie said. Lars looked at her with perplex but remained silenced. “You have proven yourself such a leader and I would never have seen you as such before this. The way you act with kids is inspirational and you take charge with an iron fist-no offense.”
Lars laughed, “None taken.”
“But you know what I’m saying. It’s just…some nights I get paranoid and I start thinking too much, and you’re the only one that understands me. I just couldn’t think of any way to say I trust you.”
“It’s okay. I know. I get emotional too.”
“Oh we all know that, Lars.”
They both laughed and pulled the covers up over the bodies. It was late and the rain hadn’t let up, so the soft beat of the raindrops hitting the glass would be a nice way to fall asleep.
“We raised some great kids.”
“Yeah we did,” Sadie laughed.
“You’re going to be a great mom.”
His words hit Sadie in the gut; simultaneously inspiring and hurtful. Sadie knew what he had meant and decided to take it as that. He wouldn’t intentionally hurt her.
“You already are,” she retorted.
They both giggled and slowly drifted off to the place where there was no disease, no zombies, and no doubt of whom they could or would become.
In the dark of the night, the only light that Lars and Sadie can find is in each other.
So I tried my hand at Bonehatter's crystal infection AU. It has been on my mind for the past week because IT IS AMAZING. It's so fascinating, and I just had to take time to write about it. And yes, it's Larsadie because they are the characters that I write best. I hope I did this AU justice and I hope you guys like it!
The cave was damp and bleak with the faint smell of smoke drifting towards the back. The fire had been put out thirty minutes prior to Lars going to bed. Sadie knew that Connie would be wherever Lars was, so she retreated to the darkest part of the cave. Sure enough, Lars was cornered off by a group of rocks in the farthest depths of the cave that the group cared to venture to. He was staring up at the ceiling with his right arm propped behind his head. Connie was nowhere to be found.
“Hey.”
He looked up to see her standing at the entrance of his “room”.
“Hey.”
“Where’s Connie?”
“She decided to sleep in Steven’s bunk.”
“Really? It’s been almost a month since she’s slept alone.”
“Yeah, Steven assured me that she’d be fine What’d you need?”
“Oh I was just going to ask her a question but I guess it can wait until morning. Goodnight.”
“Wait.” Sadie turned to see Lars reaching out for her. “Stay.” Sadie sat down next to her friend. His blanket was pulled up to his shoulders as he turned to face her.
“It was very sweet of you to take her under your wing.”
“’Least I could do for her. She’s still a kid. She, Steven, and Peedee shouldn’t have to worry about food shortages and survival. I just hope I haven’t damaged her beyond repair.”
“Yeah, but remember what we used to say when we first started out a few years ago?”
Lars chuckled, “It could always be worse.”
“Yeah,” Sadie laughed. The sound of their laughter died out and Sadie considered their motto. “Do you really believe that, Lars?”
Lars sat up; blanket locked to his torso, and looked at Sadie. “Come here,” he gestured with a head nod. Sadie crawled over to him so that her kneecaps touched his and placed her hands on her legs. She took in a long breath slowly. “Sadie?” She didn’t answer. “Sadie.” Only her eyes moved this time. “Take the blanket.”
“What?”
“Take it.” He gestured. Sadie shyly reached toward the tattered blanket and lightly tugged it from the boy. The blanket fell to reveal that Lars was shirtless. There were scars drawn up and down his abs and shoulders, but the thing that caught her attention the most was the lack of prosthetic. Sadie’s eyebrows rose slowly but her eyes did not bulge. Lars didn’t let anyone see him without his prosthetic, unless the shirt sleeve was tied at the end. But it was never bare, never vulnerable to the outside world that had betrayed it. “Your question was do I believe that things could be worse?”
Sadie shook her head gently.
“My answer to you is yes, because no matter how awful I feel about this eyesore, I know I could have died. I could have lost every memory I’ve ever had. I could have lost the amazing feeling I felt the first time I killed one of the monsters. I could have lost you and the guys.”
Sadie finally looked up to meet Lars’s gaze.
“But those are the same fears I have every day. And I know now that I can’t be the same person I used to be. I owe that to you. I made that promise when we started this thing. I made a vow to you to tell only the truth, and I would be lying if I said I didn’t hate myself some days. But I keep going because as you reminded me, ‘It could always be worse.’”
Lars sat back against one of the rocks and let his words sink in with Sadie. Even through the infection, Lars had remained stoic and stern, like the rock that Sadie thought rested where his heart should be. She soon learned he had a nurturing side, but he didn’t like talking about his feelings. When the accident had happened, Lars cut himself off from the group. It was only after two weeks that he finally let Connie start following him around, but he still didn’t talk about it. The fact that he had so willingly started the conversation was good enough for Sadie.
“Why do you hate yourself?”
“Heh, Sadie, if you haven’t noticed, I’m kind of like Luke Skywalker’s worse off half-brother. He only lost a hand, I lost a whole arm.”
“That never stopped you before.”
Lars sat up, “I’m not saying it has limited my abilities, but it has taken a toll on my self-esteem. Even if the world ever fixes itself and we go back to the way things used to be, there’s no way I could get a decent job and make what I need to survive. Much less find someone to share my life with.” He slunk low against the rock again and breathed in harshly. Sadie crawled over to where he sat and gently placed a hand against his chest. “What are you doing?”
“Just listen.” She leaned against his chest cavity and heard the familiar beat. “That is the only thing that matters.”
“What?”
“I mean that this is not a roadblock, just a detour. And I’ve never known you to back down from a challenge.” Her hand slid to his shoulder. “May I?”
“Yeah.”
Her fingers slid down his left arm to feel skin that was littered with goose bumps. She then leaned down to leave a trail of kisses from the tip of his arm to the crook of his shoulder.
“I think it’s brave.”
“Yeah,” Lars replied as Sadie recognized the familiar crack that always accompanied her friend whenever he got nervous.
“Besides, you’re not the only one that’s gone through major physical changes.”
“Yeeaaah.” Lars reached up to run a hand through Sadie’s short hair. “I dig the undercut on you. It’s pretty nice.”
“You think so?”
“Definitely.”
“What about this animal that’s growing on your face?” Sadie reached up with both hands to touch the beard that was forming on her friend’s otherwise soft face.
“Aw c’mon Sades, you know I look sexy with the scruff.”
“Riiight, I’ll let you keep believing that.”
“I thought you said you liked it?”
“I do. I just don’t like it when you compliment yourself.”
“Don’t I deserve it?”
“Maybe.”
“It’s pretty late. You want to turn it in for the night?”
“Yeah, probably better. We’ve got a lot of traveling to do tomorrow.” Sadie reached behind her back to push off and steady herself as her legs adjusted to her weight.
“Wait.” Lars reached out for Sadie’s hand and tugged slightly. “Stay here.”
“You want me to stay and sleep with you?”
“Why not? I’ve got a big blanket and a whole lot of issues. What’s not to love?” Sadie slowly lowered herself back to the ground and slid close to Lars. He grabbed the blanket and draped it over their two bodies. Sadie laid down towards Lars so that they made a small circle and pulled her arms close to her body. “Good night,” Lars said as he leaned forward to kiss her forehead.
“Good night,” Sadie replied as she turned her body so that she couldn’t see him anymore. She made sure to slide so that her back was gently nestled against Lars’s chest. By instinct Lars wrapped his arm around Sadie, but accidentally brushed against her upper chest. His hand jerked back as soon as he realized what he had done.
“Sorry,” he whispered urgently.
“Lars?”
“Yeah?”
“We’ve been on the road for a long time. The world is basically a pile of shit right now. I know you well enough. If you touch my boob, I’m not going to scream.” Sadie rolled over and grabbed Lars’s arm so that she could drape it back over her body. “You’re one of the only people I feel comfortable around.”
“I feel the same way about you.”
“Good, so if you accidentally cop a feel, don’t sweat it.”
They both laughed and let the mysterious sounds of the cave guide them to sleep. In the middle of the night, Sadie woke up to find Lars completely draped over her. She turned her head slightly and rubbed her nose against his neck. He smelled like fresh dirt and sweat, but that smell had grown on her.
