#borch three jackdaws

[svrt-degraded]

"The Bounds of Reason"

Drawn for a special edition commissioned by the AST publishing house.

[shu-bullshit]

Monsterfucker Geralt of Rivia

[tio-trile]

I only have @shu-bullshit to blame for starting a conversation about shipping these three......

[wintercearig12]

I thought I would share some of the Witcher character portrayals featured in Alain T. Puysségur’s Le Sorceleur Codex. In order: Emhyr, Cahir, Borch Three Jackdaws, Eredin and Vilgefortz. Probably should have started with Geralt and Co., but where's the fun in that.

[Part 1] [Part 2]

[cupsoupenjoyer003]

Honorable mentions

[Kindness is the new punk rock feat most kind/good witcher characters!]

[faetyrantosaurus]

Just finished The Sword of Destiny (second book in the Witcher series), and I have some thoughts about “The Bounds of Reason.” So enjoy this really long rant that was written in my notes app after I finished the chapter. Also yes I was/am an English major. No, I don’t write too much.

The Bounds of Reason:

Geralt literally sleeps with everyone. Borch is like, “Hey, let’s go up to my room. Geralt, which one is your favorite?” And Geralt’s like, “Huh wtf are you talking about bro?? These oysters are fire tho.” Then Borch goes, “Ah, I can’t choose either,” referring to Vea and Tea. AND THEN GERALT JUST??? GOES UPSTAIRS TO BATHE IN THIS HUGE CAULDRON WITH ALL OF THEM and SLEEPS WITH ALL OF THEM??

Netflix sort of did this episode wrong…???THERE’S A LIL BABY GREEN DRAGON!!!!!!

Geralt and Yennefer over here talking about vocations and goals and views for like??? 10 pages??? But I suppose it has some merit because Geralt is like “I have no destination at the end of the road” and then eventually finds out that Borch’s destination is the baby dragon, his survival, and proving that “there are no limits of possibility” because “[e]ven those who are different can survive.” Borch tells Geralt that he “will also find such a purpose” one day—and that purpose is Ciri, his child surprise, his legacy and his means of passing on, a destiny that he is trying to run away from or ignore because there is no order to this horseshit, but people like to believe there is. The parallels are paralleling.

ALSO… Boholt ties up Yennefer, rips open her shirt, and?? shamelessly gropes her??? And then Dandelion is ogling her and is like “I SHALL COMPOSE THE BALLAD OF THE TWO TITS AND WILL DIE HAPPY” like the mansplain manipulate manwhore he is instead of SLEEPING IN AND MISSING THE FIGHT like he does in the Netflix show. AND YENNEFER AND GERALT AND DANDELION ARE JUST ALL TIED UP ON A WAGON WATCHING AND PUKING WHILE THE DRAGON AND VEA AND TEA JUST OBLITERATE EVERYONE???

ALSO Dandelion realises that Borch is the golden dragon first. He’s like “Oh shit!” when Vea and Tea show up, and he’s like, “Geralt, my very intelligent friend, don’t you understand?” but Geralt’s too busy obeying Yen’s command to BURN HER ropes off using Igni and burning her flesh off in the process?? BUT IT WAS HER IDEA SO YES YENNEFER QUEEN GERALT IS DESPERATE?? AND THEN YENNEFER GOES OFF CASTING SPELLS BY SHAKING HER FREE LEG AND ANKLE? Netflix really went for Game of Thrones rather than big Slavic silly.

NETFLIX WHERE DID YOU GET YOUR IDEAS??

Okay but big problem with the whole ‘Geralt and Yennefer’ argument. Borch *does* say that Yen and Geralt’s relationship technically won’t work, but he says, “You were made for each other, you and the Witcher. But nothing will come of it. Nothing. I’m sorry.” Obviously they are both sterile, and Yen wishes to have a child, but Geralt is just kind of… Geralt. Yen doesn’t get mad, and neither does Geralt??? Yen just says that she’d like to believe that there are no limits of possibility, or at the very least that they are still very far away. So she’s hopeful I guess. And she also shows less animosity at the end of The Bounds of Reason, saying that she’d essentially forgive Geralt despite rejecting and insulting him the entire trip beforehand.

Philosophical takeaway: Geralt, ‘bound’ by principles and the limits of possibility and reason, the times we live in… and yet times are changing, and so the bounds of reason must be crossed.

[astaldis]

Whumpy, Angsty & Smutty and miscellaneous Jaskier Fics Masterpost

The first four ones have the smut, te ther fics the angst and whump. Enjoy!

Smutty 🌶️

Shimmering Scales and Stormy Seas

This is the story of Jaskier's first time. Decide yourself if it is true or just a tall tale. (With accompanying 'art': Shimmering Scales and Horny Bard)

E; Words: 800; Chapters: 1/1

Oh, the Waves

On the beach you meet a stranger with a weird instrument. It is Jaskier, the man of your dreams. Or is he a dream?

E; Words: 1,341; Chapters: 1/1

Magenta Monster

Jaskier has the most amazing sex with a very weird, magenta-coloured monster.

E; Words: 415; Chapters: 1/1

'Of Tulips and Tits' or 'The Magic of Chocolate Mousse'

Jaskier and Yennefer return to their cottage by the sea for a little holiday twosomeness. As it turns out, the bard cannot only make the best ever mousse au chocolate, but also knows a more than exciting way how to eat it.

E; Words: 1,646; Chapters: 1/1

More Mousse Magic

There is still some mousse au chocolate left in the bowl and Yennefer is not finished with Jaskier quite yet.

E; Words: 568; Chapters: 1/1

Whumpy or Angsty 🩸

Where The Tulips Grow

Geralt, Yennefer, and Ciri learn that Jaskier has gone missing under suspicious circumstances. Circumstances that hint at a kidnapping. Yennefer leaves Geralt with Ciri and goes to save the bard. But not all goes as planned. The hero becomes the damsel in distress and Jaskier has to save the day. (Post-season 2)

Yenskier; M; Words: 23,951; Chapters: 9/9

A Recipe for Disaster

While Geralt's company is staying in Beauclair, another festive event is coming up. However, not all is going as planned. Will his friends be able to rescue their bard?

T; Words: 3,504; Chapters: 1/1

Help Me, He Whimpers

While collecting firewood for the campfire, Jaskier goes missing in the forest. When Geralt finds him, a surprise is waiting for the Witcher. And it is not a nice one.

T; Words: 2,167; Chapters: 1/1

Sleep now

Jaskier has a terrible nightmare. Geralt soothes him. But was it really just a nightmare?

M; Words: 423; Chapters: 1/1

Silence

It is quiet. Not a single sound. Eerie. Absolute silence. But should he not hear twigs crunching under the soles of his boots? The autumn wind whispering in the trees' orange and yellow leaves that lend a golden glow to the picturesque landscape? Birds twittering in the bushes and sheep bleating in the distant meadows? How can there be this deep and utter silence? And why is he alone? Where is everybody? Milva? Regis? Cahir? And, most of all, Geralt?

T; Words: 800; Chapters: 1/1

Where is Jaskier?

While the Hansa is on their journey searching for the druids of Caed Dhu, Jaskier goes missing. Geralt is worried, very worried.

T; Words: 9,054; Chapters: 7/7

Out Of The Blue

While on their search for Yennefer and Ciri, the Hansa makes camp in a glade. Suddenly, they are under attack, and it is neither by Nilfgaard nor by troops from the north.

T; Words: 4,202; Chapters: 2/2

Don't Despair, Friends

On their journey to rescue Ciri, the members of Geralt's Hansa have to eat all kinds of grub. One day it has rather unpleasant consequences. Luckily, they have Regis.

T; Words: 400; Chapters: 1/1

This fucking hurts!

Jaskier has a little mishap. It hurts. How lucky that he has friends.

T; Words: 735; Chapters: 1/1

Is that normal? - Or: A Lesson in Botany

While on their mission to rescue Ciri, Jaskier makes the acquaintance of a plant. Geralt is not happy. Fortunately, they have Regis, the higher-vampire-barber-surgeon-herbalist with them.

T; Words: 1,071; Chapters: 1/1

"Ouch" Says The Bard

"Ouch!" he exclaims, flinching back from her ...

T; Words: 150; Chapters: 1/1

Too Close

"Geralt, I've found something. Look, isn't it a darling baby?" Jaskier beams at the Witcher from where he is kneeling next to a bush on the edge of the forest. "No! Don't touch it, whatever it is!"But it is too late ...

T; Words: 1,860; Chapters: 1/1

Once in the Greenest Green Meadow

Jaskier is bitten by a very strange creature that not even Geralt has ever seen or heard of before. There are unexpected repercussions.

T; Words: 2,324; Chapters: 2/2

What the Blub?

Jaskier drinks from a well and swallows something fishy. How lucky that Geralt is there to help his bard.

T; Words: 700; Chapters: 1/1

I'll let the sea birds cry

Jaskier walks along a lonely beach, remembering his lost friends.

T; Words: 1,125; Chapters: 1/1

And We Fall Into Each Other

In the chaos of the attack on the refugee camp by the Chotla, Geralt and Jaskier got separated from the others and ended up as prisoners of Marshall Vissegerd who orders them hanged as spies. Is this the end of Geralt's mission to find Ciri? It almost looks like it - until Redania shows up.

M; Words: 2,338; Chapters: 1/1

Dreams

When Geralt is gone, all that is left to Jaskier are dreams.

T; Words: 123; Chapters: 1/1

Heat and Dust

It has been the hottest, driest summer in the Lyrian Plains since ever and monsters born of heat and dust are haunting the fields around the small villages. Fortunately, Geralt of Rivia is already on his way. At the tavern, a surprise is waiting for the thirsty Witcher.

T; Words: 4,880; Chapters: 1/1

'Toad' or 'A Very Unusual Pet' Chapter 12 & 13

A variation on Rience torturing Jaskier for information.

Ysgith Chapter 2

Geralt and his company stick to the original plan and travel through the Ysgith wilderness. Maybe not such a good idea after all ...

To Kiss or not to Kiss Chapter 3

Jaskier and Geralt's escape from the Redanian army camp from Season 4 Episode 4.

Into the Fog

As their ferry glides down the Yaruga through the mist, Jaskier shudders. But it's not only because of the weather.

T; Words: 555; Chapters: 1/1

Miscellaneous

A Lesson in Zoology

After Geralt has left, Jaskier gets the information about what happened on the mountain from the others. Then there is one question that he needs to ask the dragon before they part ways, a rather personal one.

T; Words: 900; Chapters: 1/1

Yuletide Delight

Regis visits Jaskier at the Chameleon in Novigrad. But he is not only there to say hello to an old friend.

G; Words: 2,237; Chapters: 2/2

Of Dandelions and Violets

Jaskier has a Valentine's date - but of course, nothing goes according to plan.

T; Words: 1,231; Chapters: 1/1

Candles

A year has passed since the events at Stygga Castle and Geralt, Yennefer and Ciri remember their fallen friends.

T; Words: 1,100; Chapters: 1/1

[jakis-zjeb]

Dragon... You beautiful

Smoku... jesteś piękny

Yeeeeeaaaahhh... If you know, you know.