Brain Problems, Inflammation & Self-Esteem
My experience with brain issues and injury has been synonymous with issues of inflammation.
Inflammation sucks. It impacts every area of a person’s life, particularly, by way of self-esteem. Both chemically in that your body’s eco-system is never quite right, making you feel “off” and then as a matter of physical issues that stem from that.
We can also physically see inflammation. It looks like weight gain, which, it is... namely in the form of fluid.
The thing about inflammation, is that the minute we see it appear, we freak out. “I’m getting FAT.” At least this is usually my reaction. The thing about inflammation is that it can actually be a sign that you’re healing, so don’t be too quick to judge it.
This doesn’t bode well for the self esteem when we’re mentally attached to the idea of appearing to others in a certain way. It doesn’t feel good to know that you work out everyday, you eat all the right foods and you look 15 pounds heavier than you should.
It is important that we understand inflammation first before judging it. A younger me would go on crazy diets (I was dabbling in eating disorder territory for most of my teens and early 20s) or mask the same problem by just exhausting my body to the point it couldn’t have any extra puff.
I understand now how doing this to myself made it impossible for my body to HEALTH from the real problem it was experience... an f’ing brain injury, ya know? I didn’t even give it a change because I was too busy worrying about no longer being hot and attractive to men. For the record, we’re talking about maybe 10 pounds here.... yet, to a person experiencing this “weight gain” problem who is living a healthy life, it is absolutely panic territory.
A word on anti-inflammatory diets.
I’ve done a number of them over the years in my “I’m getting fat” panic modes. And the inflammation does go down. But the thing I want to note about a person experiencing a brain injury is that you have to be more careful in dieting than the average person or you can end up creating food sensitivities for yourself left and right. At some point, your body will inflame to just about anything you put in it, as it sees the substances coming in and doesn’t know what do with them.
The point I’m making, is that you want to RETRAIN your body to understand what it should do with the “normal” foods that would be a part of your regular diet. This isn’t to say it wouldn’t be helpful to cut back on the dairy, eliminate alcohol for a time, watch your sugar intake or be gluten free (I do all of these things and have found them vital to managing my condition). But in terms of more extreme auto-immune type protocols, be careful here that your intentions are healthfully motivated and focused. That this is not about you losing the panic weight, and that you and your doctor, have decided you need a reboot...and then will be reintroducing and retraining these foods back into your systems alongside likely supplementation and some type of physical therapy.
Sound complicated. Well, it is. And yet, it’s simple. Leave your poor body alone to it’s inflammation. Sleep a lot. Work out daily but don’t over do it. Make good food choices. And work on your self-esteem....even with some extra weight.
The hardest thing for me has been the way I see people who know me as an “athlete” look at me and thing I’ve let myself go when I haven’t. I do the work. And it kills me to think that people could be looking at me thinking I need to lose a few pounds when it’s literally not my fault. But this too, is a matter of pride. A matter of surrender, and a matter of letting my body truly heal (and maybe surrounding myself with people who’d love me for me and even be the types who’d be open to knowing what I’m going through before they judge).
Be well. Work through your inflammation, don’t just get rid of it. It’s different for us.
