The operator of this train is having a Really Good Day today…

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The operator of this train is having a Really Good Day today…
Continuing the day's white trash theme... Two drug-addled hot messes, with a young boy in tow, step on the foot of some equally-trashy guy who has his legs sprawled out on the T aisle. They start flipping out at each other in front of said going boy, saying things like "like get a bigger penis if you're gonna wear skinny jeans". Their disgustingness aside, I think it's time we start requiring licenses to procreate. And breathe. Effective immediately. Spotted: on the Red Line, where Darwin's theories have no place
"Nah, I don't need to hold onto the pole!" said the idiotic woman, right before she went flying, scuffed up my fly new Toms, and sheared a layer of skin off my foot. Spotted: on the Red Line, where life's a balancing act
Shitty preteen boys are talking about "pulling out last minute and jizzing on her bellayyyy" and getting their "d's sucked." And that is how you know who's a virgin and has never even seen a pair of boobs. Spotted: on the Red line, where virginity is lush and alive
I'm honestly not sure what's worse - screaming into your phone on a packed train at 7:20am or wearing Mickey Mouse leggings. Both, however, should be punishable by death. Spotted: on the Red Line, the happiest place on earth
fuck you