Nov 30 - the final day of my month of posts of gratitude. This is a picture I took..and its representative of several of the things I'm grateful for...obviously, it's Justin Furstenfeld, who is the singer / songwriter for my all time favorite band, Blue October.... but the picture represents more than that to me! Its obviously the artists and music and what they mean to me, but it's the new friends made through the music, and new adventures made with old friends because of the music too. It's my gratitude for being able to pick up a new hobby and form of expression in the last year, through photography....It's gratitude that I've been able to do things this year that I was too afraid to do before. Because I was afraid of what people would think, or how I would look, or be perceived. Or afraid of how my pain and illness would stop me from doing those things. Of how finally admitting to myself that not using the assistance I need doesn't make me NOT disabled, it just makes me lose out on a lot of joy and keeps me on the sidelines of life. The pain, the illness and the fear aren't gone, but I'm getting better at not letting them stop me from pushing through to chase dreams, even if it means I have to do that with modifications and allowances that make me uncomfortable, like taking a walker/seat to the shows so that when my joints give out, I can still be safe and not cause a serious injury. I was terrified to do it, after all, having your walker at the front row of a rock show is anything but inconspicuous, lol. But, being brave enough to finally do that, made me brave enough to audition for a play for the first time in 27 years... and I was chosen for the role I wanted!!! It's even a lead role! I still can't believe it! All this to say that I'm just grateful for everything and everyone in my life... I'm loving where it's at ,even though it's far from perfect..it like me, won't ever be perfect, but I'm learning that's not the goal anyway. Much love, and I hope this long, rambling post made sense to someone other than me, lol! #blueoctober #breakground #home #loveyourlife #staysticky #grateful #attitudeofgratitude #thankfullness #bluefamily (at Dreamcatcher Drive)
