With a steeled glare, the ginger gives a sarcastic salute to the spacer. “Roger that, Captain Asshole,” the trooper grumbles back. “Just like you can forget about asking the Republic militia for back up the next time you stick your neck out too far, and need the cavalry to ride in and save your scrawny ass.”
“Who in the hell are you callin’ scrawny, kid?”
Hanan throws her arms up between the two, one hand in a warning gesture to the trooper, and the other grabbing Merrick by the shirt collar and yanking him down to eye-level. “Boys, you’re both pretty. Now shut the hell up, before I strand the both of you on Hoth, Force willing we get out of this mess. Am I clear?” The silence is heavy, and finally the two give a reluctant nod of agreement.
She reaches up and pinches the bridge of her nose, her other hand still clutching the fabric of Merrick’s collar. With a long-drawn sigh, Hanan breathes, “Good. Now, I’m only gonna ask this once, so you idiots had better be paying attention to me- and, eyes up, crackshot. Sergeant, the ship’s holed up in hangar 21, correct?”
“Yes, ‘m.”
“And thanks to this fool, we’re trapped behind storage crates hiding from Imperial mercs, what a plot twist,” Hanan grumbled, letting go of the captain to turn her back to the crates and slide down to the floor. “This is a disaster. You’ve turned an easy hit to a disaster mission, Merrick.”
Crossing his arms over his chest, the captain sneered, mumbling, “It isn’t my fault.”
“Ha! Really, that so? Because from where I’m standing, we wouldn’t have this problem if it weren’t for you,” the trooper shot back. Merrick’s expression was obvious: You say one more word, and I will deck you in the face, no hesitation. Instead, the spacer simply pointed to a spot on the ground three feet to Trufax’s left. The trooper side-stepped, and with a feigned look of enlightenment, replied, “Oh, you’re right. It isn’t your fault, from here.”
“No, Merrick, he’s right. Because I’m right. Because, we wouldn’t have this problem if the pilot hadn’t blown our cover!” Hanan hissed, her face hidden in her hands. It was bad enough trying to run missions when it was just Merrick. When it was Merrick and another hot-headed, reckless young thing with something to prove, Hanan was stepping from disaster to disaster. It was exhausting keeping the two from bickering every second of the day.
“Hey. That guard was watching us. It was an easy call, thinking he was gonna call an ambush. This isn’t my fault,” Merrick argued.
There wasn’t any sense hiding her frustration anymore. Throwing her hands down into her lap, Hanan rolled her eyes. “He was checking you out, you dimwit. The way you pop that stupid jacket collar, it’s a wonder you don’t get mistaken for queer more often, honestly.”
The trooper’s hand went to cover his mouth to hide the snicker, and Merrick’s face flushed a hint of red. “It is not my fault that people find me attractive, alright?” he snapped. And then, dropping his voice, he hissed to the woman, “But I don’t really have to argue that to you, now do I?”
She took a sharp breath, staring the smuggler down, until Trufax started waving his hand at them. “Guys, patrols are changing shifts. If we’re gonna break for it with the least amount of blaster fire, now would be the time.”
Merrick held out a hand to help Hanan to her feet faster, and once she was standing, the markswoman threatened into his ear, “This conversation is far from over, you understand me?”
She felt his grip tighten lightly, and he whispered back, “Loud and clear, ma’am. Now, let’s get the hell out of here.”
The guttural murmur he managed to groan out in response was less than reassuring, and Hanan bit her lip.
Navigating the steely warehouse halls was enough of task without having to practically carry her Pilot around. She could feel him getting heavier as consciousness seeped out of him, thick liquid trailing them in dark red spots on the ground.
She caught the sound of heavy footsteps ahead of them, and ground her teeth together.
“Pilot, we finished the job, and I don’t technically need you anymore. If you seriously cannot so much as lift your blaster then I will drop you like the dead weight that you are and leave you here.”
She heard him mutter some unintelligible swear and nodded inwardly.
That was good.
If he had the energy to call her a bitch or mutter on about “Captain” then the hit might not be as bad as she feared.
Then again, it was Faltinnar.
A guard rounded the corner and Hanan sucked in a breath, but Merrick reliably lifted his free hand and pulled the trigger.
He only clipped the guard’s collarbone, but the blaster was reliable and judging by the writhing heap he collapsed into, Hanan guessed the supportive bone had snapped.
Half-dead, bleeding out, and being dragged along by a one-legged person half his size and the Captain was still a reliably good shot.
She made a mental note to thank him later.
Mercifully, she found her way to the dock. There was no doubt Sylvester’s men had cut them off, but if they could just make it to the ship…
Hanan adjusted her grip on Merrick’s waist, pulling him against her closer, trying not to notice the warm wetness that met her as she leaned his weight against her.
“Ready sir?”
He held up his left hand and twirled the blaster lazily, spitting out a mouthful of red.
She nodded once, held up her right hand, the glinting hooked blades poised for attack, and hit the door’s entrance.
At first, the chaotic whirl of a battle mid-brew set her rigid, but as realization struck her, Hanan sighed and made a break for the ship.
The cavalry had arrived.
- - -
Hanan leaned against the cool metal walls of the ship with closed eyes, listening to the purr of the engine off the bridge. She breathed slowly, hoping to keep thoughts at bay. 'Inner peace' and all that.
But everyone knew that jedi bullshit was just a load, and her demons plagued her nonetheless.
Imagines of Merrick collapsing against her, his slouched, sloshly form pooling out blood as she hauled him onto the ship, of his blood dripping off her dark fingers.
After medical hauled him away she’d shamelessly hidden in her quarters. She tore off every thread of her clothes, all stained with red, and wasted too much hot water trying to clean it from herself. Trying to disguise hot tears as she scrubbed skin raw.
And she’d remained about as selfishly hidden until he’d been cleared for duty again, not that it had taken long. The moment he awoke he’d wanted to be out and about, but medical kept him for the better part of two weeks.
In that time, Hanan had only gone to see him once, to report the crew’s status, and she hadn’t lingered about either.
She knew she should have, hated herself for not being there for him. All things considered she should have been the first person he saw.
She watched in her mind’s eye as that first shot nailed him for the thousandth time and he crumbled to the ground beside her.
She opened her eyes and stared at the corridor wall opposite her, focused on the miniscule imperfections, on the grey steel. But it all looked red to her.
To her right, a door slid open, and Merrick stepped out, beaming at her. “Thought I might find you here.”
She nodded to him. “Need something?”
He shrugged, meandering toward her in a pointedly-off-balance step.
He hadn’t seemed to mind her distance, or if he had, he’d been particular about not showing it since getting out.
“You alright, Legolas?” He asked, his voice tiptoeing around trouble with an air of casualty.
She nodded and forced a smile. “Yes, sorry. I’m not good at feeling sorry for idiots who get themselves shot that I then get carry around.”
His casually-cautious smirk erupted into a grin and he laughed. “Excuse you. Who did most of the shooting even after being gunned down? Yeah I thought so.”
She smiled little more honestly, stepping towards him.
He let his arms fall on her waist, then, and pulled her up into him, his mouth closing against her neck.
Her skin prickled at the sensation, and she hesitated, pulling away slightly to give the perimeter a check.
Faltinnar sighed against her and deflated some. “There’s no one here.”
The two were hardly a secret among the crew, but the thought of being looked on amid romantic or sexual endeavors made Hanan cringe. Most people regarded her as an asexual ice queen, and she rather liked it that way. She had no interest in being perceived as a romantic creature.
Finally, she concluded that there was no one near, and relaxed into his touch, and her tormented thoughts were quickly drowned by his mouth.
- - -
In her sleep, even, fear found her.
Merrick fell beside her hundreds of times over, each time dead before she could flinch at him.
His blood pooled out and drowned her.
His eyes turned a soft shade of brown and his hair grew into caramel blonde curls, and he screamed with Heike’s voice as a blade fell on her throat.
Hanan heard their screams resonate within her chest and vibrate out among her bones, and their blood turned her skin from brown to red.
She awoke with a start but no movement, eyes flashing open, wide, alert, and afraid. Reality settled on her, and she calmed her breathing as quietly as she was able.
She pulled off her loose shirt, the sweat on her skin making it stick to her otherwise, and pulled her blanket up.
Merrick was fine. Off in his chambers, sleeping or whatever he did at this hour.
She hadn’t killed him.
She had saved him.
She tried to focus on that, but the world was fuzzy with fear and tiredness.
She closed her eyes and pulled the covers over her head, curling herself into a ball. She wanted to go to his quarters, just to see him. Just to reassure her paranoid brain that he was still there.
She tried to think of a good reason to see him at this hour, but nothing short of a shag came to mind, and she couldn’t bring herself to fuck in this mindset, and she was far too proud to suggest they share a room,
She felt like a child.
She felt hectic and scared and over emotional.
She felt trapped.
- - -
Hanan watched at Faltinnar dropped his jacket against the pilot’s chair, twirling it about to face her as he fell into it. “That,” he said, pulling his hands behind his head. “was the easiest smuggling operation I’ve had.”
Hanan nodded. “Yes, everything went according to plan.” She said simply.
He smiled and turned toward the controls. “What do you say we combine our profits? I could do with a vacation without the crew around.”
She glanced at the entrance to the control room, thought about locking it. Thought about just going back to her room and forgetting it, but she turned her gaze back on Merrick and breathed deeply. “Not all of operations run so smoothly.” She said, her voice even and careful. Professional.
“Well, yeah.” He responded, the smirk evident in his voice even when she couldn’t see it. “Figure that out on your own?”
She sighed, trying to keep the room from spinning. He wasn’t serious enough. There was no good way to bring this up.
She steeled herself. “Faltinnar, I’m staying.”
He paused at the controls, and turned toward her. “Oh—did you have business here? You should have said something.”
“Actually I have a job off-planet.”
He furrowed his brow at her. “Then we’ll set course for there?”
Her composure snapped before she could even attempt to keep it in place, and she spit a swear at the ground.
“Hey, what’s the matter?” He said, rising, worry affecting his voice slightly.
Hanan found the courage to look him in the eye, tried to look as cold as possible. “I’m going on a hunt, Merrick. I’m leaving.”
Her words hung in the air for a quiet moment as he stared at her, letting their meaning sink in.
“You’re…what?”
She held his gaze. “Working with you has been a pleasure, but I’m afraid this is where our partnership ends, Captain.”
He fell forward slightly, grabbing her shoulders with intensity that fell somewhere between pleading and comforting. “Hey, hey, woah. You can’t just…run out on the Pilot like that, Issa.” He said, his forced-pep faltering.
Her eyes fell to the ground, and she continued speaking in her professional voice. “As thanks to you and yours, I promise never to take a job against you or in any way endanger your crew. If I ever catch wind of trouble, I’ll try to steer it off course.”
He pushed his forehead against hers, pulled her waist in close. “Fuck, Hanan talk to me! What the hell is going on? What happened?”
She closed her eyes. “I’ll leave my cut of today’s operation with you as thanks for all that you’ve done for—“
“Goddamn it Hanan look at me!” he yelled, his voice loud and quaking.
She obeyed, and regretting obeying immediately, pinned under his gaze.
He stared at her for a long time, trying to search for some explanation. When he finally spoke, his voice was soft. “Is someone after you?”
“No.”
“Is it the money?”
“No.”
“Do you need to do something without me?”
She stared at him, and wondered how long it would take until he pried the truth out of her.
He swallowed hard. “If there’s something you’ve gotta do on your own, I can respect that. But when it’s finished you come back to us, you hear?”
She shook her head microscopically, and Merrick visibly deflated.
“Tell me why.”
She dropped her gaze again. “I can’t.” she said, her voice barely a whisper.
“Why can’t you?” he pleaded. He was grasping her so tightly it hurt, but she was thankful for the intensity. For some final amount of passion, no matter the sort.
Because if I have to watch you die, it will destroy me.
She looked up at him, then.
If she told him the truth, he’d talk her out of it. Convince her to stay with him a little longer.
It had to be now.
She reached up then, pulling her arms around him shoulders and kissed him hard.
They pulled against each other with such intensity that it hurt. She could feel the desperation in his fingernails as their dug into her flesh and mirrored it. Hard and rough and in pain.
Finally, she pulled away from him entirely, and he stared at her with mixed emotions in his eyes.
She could see his tentative hope. That perhaps that kiss didn’t mean goodbye, but that he’d convinced her to stay.
But it didn’t. And deep down, he knew it didn’t.
She gave him a curt nod and backed away, through the door. “Captain.”
i just fought this sith gal and she ended the fight by force pulling my blasters from my fucking hands i feel like this is something hanan does to merrick on a daily basis
he didnt even look shocked he looked fed up like "fucking hell this bullshit agAIN"
