Growing up with the last name “Kil” was actually kind of bad enough. Since Kindergarten, people would say, “Kill Brian” and anything similar to it. It might not seem like an insult now, but it’s hard to come back to that in Kindergarten. I had a seventh grade math teacher that once announced to the class, “Looks like Brian Kil killed his grade!” I was an easy target. It wasn’t until high school I really ignored the funny looks when I would introduce myself and I had my football team refer to me by my last name. I had a Marines officer tell me, “Second Lieutenant Kil? You’re meant to be a Marine,” to which I smiled proudly. But that’s it. After a while, it just becomes something someone calls you. Unless someone steals it to call themselves that.
On December 18, Derick Clements tweeted at me: https://twitter.com/iamthesocialguy/status/677943917678080000.
I thought it was a joke until I googled it and found only an article or two written about it. There wasn’t much and I assumed people dismissed it as much as I already had. Just a few days later, my LinkedIn alerts said I had a bunch of people looking at my LinkedIn profile. When I looked at who these people were, 100% of them were from Indiana.
As a side, I want to say this: I wished it was any state but Indiana. I know a few people following this story might end up reading this, but still I’m not the biggest fan of Indiana. First of all, Reggie Miller is, by default, hated by any New York Knicks fan. I’ve always hated the Pacers as a team because of this, save for the brief stint that Donnie Walsh had with our team (that was amazing). Further, I was never really a big fan of Notre Dame. And lastly, perhaps most importantly, I never forgot its pretty serious history of racism in the state. But that was a long time ago, Brian...Kil. I know, I know. But the way Pacers fans chose to mock Spike Lee didn’t really keep their past...in the past.
Anyway, getting back to the topic, I really didn’t know what to make of it. Even when I type Brian Kil on Google, the autocorrect usually points to Brian Kilmeade, who I wish never to be associated with (though at this point, I don’t mind his company compared to this other kid). The first question that would pop in anybody’s mind would likely be, “Why Brian Kil?” As a kid, when I tried to create an AOL Screen Name “Brian Kil” only to find out it was taken, I got angry, “Whoever took that is not named Brian Kil!”
Then I got a little worried. Would I be the next subject of Alex Taub’s Mistaken Identities? I chuckled at the irony that it wasn’t even a month since I published an interview with the creators of the documentary, “Help Us Find Sunil Tripathi” on my Huffington Post blog. I told some of my friends and coworkers. Some were horrified. But most shared the same initial reaction as me: utter confusion. I kind of tucked it away as just an unfortunate event all around: a minor inconvenience for me and empty threats to real people that thankfully never materialized.
The new year comes and I googled my name. My Tumblr, my interview with the creator of Daft Punk’s and Louis C.K.’s website, and my LinkedIn profile were all still there. Also Brian Kilmeade’s Wikipedia page. There was one link, however, that referred to the story in Indiana. I told Alex Taub about it and he semi-joked that I should do something about it in regards to SEO. But unless I found the next Facebook or make something ridiculously newsworthy, I’d need to just chalk that up as a stain that would erase itself in time.
Googling my name and checking Twitter for this coward has become sort of a thing when I get bored. It’s like checking Facebook (disclaimer: the guy name threats on Facebook only, which I don’t have). They never caught him. A few kids foolishly claimed to be the guy only to find out there wasn’t much other evidence to support those idiotic claims. A man was arrested for bringing a gun to the school the threats were being made against—it seems the man was trying to make a point that the school wasn’t safe. I’m not terribly sure there were any further threats made in the recent weeks since. Now my Google search results are only cluttered with references to this guy—no sign of me, Brian Kil.
I’m still not entirely sure what to make of it. I feel bad for the people he is calling out by name. I feel bad that parents are afraid to send their children out to school or to the mall. I don’t know what has driven him to do it—though, at the same time, I’m not entirely sure his threats warrant any more media attention than he’s getting. Why keep stroking his ego? Why keep giving in to whatever he wants? The Internet is a powerful place of false identities but also a powerful place of false threats. Hiding behind a screen and typing words plays a greater effect than the Milgram experiments, primarily because the feedback loop is so immediate. There may be no authority figure influencing one to do it but the herd mentality the general public has along with the social proof and gratification that comes with participation is a dangerous cocktail for the youth and the elderly alike. I’m incredibly thankful that this isn’t a case where online threats materialized. But the fear is real. And whatever happens from here, it’s been a major learning experience for me.