#bribes?

[musically-plagued]

How did they get anyone to do Tropic Thunder?

[classywhoresandprocrastina-blog1]

Proving that I am the best child ever

When buying things for my parents I make sure that I still get some form of payment from them

No, not money

Something even better

1. Ask them to star in a short recording

2. Tell them to repeat the words:

“Dear *insert siblings name here* I am announcing that *insert your own name* is the best son/daughter in the whole of human history. Ever.”

3. USE THIS MASTERPIECE AGAINST THEM FOREVER

Honestly the uses of this are infinite and highly beneficial for yourself 

[mab-speaks]

Mab finds time to write by

“Hey, older kid” ... *offers bag of sourpatch kids* ... “Take your brother downstairs for an hour and watch him.”

Older kid: “Thanks, Mama”

*the clouds part and a ray of free writing time shines down on my face*

[osanecif]

DAP funds used for spying, bribes?

MANILA - Projects funded by the disbursement acceleration program are under question following the Supreme Court decision to strike down the controversial measure. DAP funds used for spying, bribes?

[madisonmartin]

I NEVER GET TEXTS

I don't think anyone knows my number though......

[urania-and-the-void]

Guys...

please yell at me and tell me to go to sleep.

I really need to go to bed.

But tumblr is distracting. :(