Sep 9, 2015
red and also black but only if i can keep your teeth 😘
💋
seen from Australia
seen from Uzbekistan
seen from United States
seen from South Korea
seen from United States
seen from Israel
seen from Netherlands
seen from China
seen from United States
seen from Malaysia
seen from South Korea
seen from United States
seen from Netherlands
seen from Greece
seen from South Korea
seen from Malaysia
seen from United Kingdom
seen from Russia
seen from South Korea
seen from India
red and also black but only if i can keep your teeth 😘
💋
odd numbers
2. Who's getting on your nerves right now
Whatever low-pressure or high-pressure weather bullshit made me wake up with a splitting headache. Fuck that.
4. Who's getting on your nerves right now
The assholes outside my window who are using leafblowers. Leafblowers. Is there anything more futile.
6. Who's getting on your nerves right now
People with no spacial awareness. I have a theory that when people with no spacial awareness die they’re sent to a special Hell. It’s a crowded cafeteria full of other people with no spacial awareness. To get out and go to heaven or purgatory or whatever they have to find a table, get a bowl of soup, and carry it back to their table without spilling a drop or taking so long that it gets cold. They’re all in there for eternity because everyone else keeps suddenly stopping in front of them or cutting them off to go talk to their friends. They suffer indefinitely.
It’s the closest thing I have to a faith.
8. Who's getting on your nerves right now
No, yelling shit at a movie screen is not “just like MST3K.” No one who has ever said anything along the lines of “we’re going to MST3K [movie]” has ever said anything funny.
10. Who's getting on your nerves right now
Troye Sivan’s name still pisses me off.
12. Who's getting on your nerves right now
Why do people pretend that Bradley Cooper is a good actor? He has only one character, "slimy guy who takes himself way too seriously.”
14. Who's getting on your nerves right now
I saw someone talking about the “Tintin fandom.” Why does everything need a fandom. Can people not like things without making it into an identity?
16. Who's getting on your nerves right now
There’s a girl in my English class who clearly gets all her talking points from her Tumblr. I loathe her.
18. Who's getting on your nerves right now
There’s also a guy in that same English class who never wears shoes. Or socks. It can be rainy or sunny but he just strolls in, bare feet covered in mud. I want to step on his toes for being so goddamn disgusting. God. I bet he’s got some asinine concept that it’s good for his arches or something. Wearing shoes is not bourgeoisie, guys, calm down.
20. Who's getting on your nerves right now
I’m still residually pissed off from that “steal yo girl haircuts” post from a month ago. Manbuns are only nice in that they broadcast which guys are so insecure about their total lack of personality that they feel the need to supplement it. Like mullets, except for basicness instead of white-trashiness.
22. Who's getting on your nerves right now
Tag your Cartoon Network IPs because words cannot express how viscerally I don’t want to see them.
24. Who's getting on your nerves right now
This isn’t really a confession because I’ve made my opinions clear on it before but I never liked Spongebob. I hated him when I was five and I hate him now. I hate that people just reblog jokes from the show because I can’t blacklist "stupid early-2000s cartoon references.” Someone suggest that xkit extension.
26. Who's getting on your nerves right now
Someone on one of the quads here has a guitar and really wants everyone else to know he can play it. I’d just like him to know that I really hate him.
28. Who's getting on your nerves right now
Why are there so many tour groups? They keep clogging all the archways and not fucking moving. And it’s mostly parents who presumably have some concept of spacial awareness. Do you not see the cluster of students you’re blocking? Jesus.
30. Who's getting on your nerves right now
This guy in my astronomy class last semester had a beard and was trying to hold some beard competition. He put up a poster right outside the exit to my dorm and I had to see it every time I left the building. It felt so violating.
32. Who's getting on your nerves right now
Whoever’s in the room above me really loves to throw fucking furniture-rearranging parties or whatever the fuck. There’s just constant scraping noises coming from the ceiling.
34. Who's getting on your nerves right now
answered.
36. Who's getting on your nerves right now
Some movies warrant being three hours long but Blue Is the Warmest Color is not one of those movies.
38. Who's getting on your nerves right now
What was the tipping point that finally shut down widespread yellow journalism? was it when they started a war because of their bullshit rumors? Can clickbait start instigating some war crimes so we have a moral imperative to regulate it? 10 things you won’t believe the human spine can withstand, This one amazing video shows you what you can do with all those skulls of the innocent you have lying around, 14 mind-blowing atrocities (that you can do at home)--number 6 will shock you!
40. Who's getting on your nerves right now
How are there so many shitty TV shows? Why do people continue to accept laugh tracks on said TV shows? Is it because canned laughter is honestly preferable to having to endure more of HIMYM’s writing? Why do people hate themselves enough to watch bad television?
42. Who's getting on your nerves right now
Are twinks human? I feel like in order to be considered human you need at least rudimentary self-awareness and at least a suggestion of a moral compass.
44. Who's getting on your nerves right now
Related: Why is Jake Bass so popular? Why do white girls like hideous twinks so much?
46. Who's getting on your nerves right now
What’s with the trend of car advertisements where they just show you thirty seconds of things completely unrelated to cars or their company and then end with a glimpse of whatever car they’re selling? Why is every single model of car “completely reengineered”? Did all the other ones suck? What on God’s green earth does Bruce Lee have to do with Mazda?
48. Who's getting on your nerves right now
All the GameFAQs guides for Battle Network insist on using the Japanese names for everything. Like, whatever, you think that some of the English names are dumb, but a) half of them are the same thing, like what kind of superiority do you get from writing “Maylu” instead of “Mayl” it’s the exact same fucking name and b) who the shit is your audience? Your guide is in English, so presumably your readers are playing the English version. No one’s like “gosh I can read and understand Japanese perfectly, better use the English GameFAQs guide--oh good they use all the transliterated Japanese names. Thank god. I was worried I’d have to use something written in my primary language.”
50. Who's getting on your nerves right now
It’s pronounced “jif” like the peanut butter this is not a debate you are just wrong
52. Who's getting on your nerves right now
Seriously if you try to pull that “it stands for graphic not jraphic” shit i really hope you pronounce jpeg like jfeg because it stands for “photographer” oh wait what’s that? oh yeah that’s the sound of you being full of shit
54. Who's getting on your nerves right now
Yall realize that nothing’s stopping you from just buying the cheaper “male” product right? Like this is literally capitalism in action if things don’t need to be gendered then just buy the cheaper shit like i cannot believe this is a problem. Can you not bear to use men’s shampoo? Such fragile femininity etc etc
56. Who's getting on your nerves right now
Stop acting like puns are a war crime jesus fuck. your “omFG GET OUT” is not needed you are not funny for pretending to overreact to them
58. Who's getting on your nerves right now
I love the people who got all righteous over tumblr mobile allowing you to delete captions like yeah that’s really going to be the tipping point that leads to people removing artist credit, that wasn’t a problem at all before they made that update. also stop acting like it wasn’t specifically to let people remove those godawful //pale blog// tags
60. Who's getting on your nerves right now
If I see one more YikYak post that goes “ngl I just really wanna cuddle with someone and watch Netflix” i will scream
62. Who's getting on your nerves right now
Bob’s Burgers is not that funny you guys can chill
64. Who's getting on your nerves right now
put up the toilet seat if you can’t control your piss. you are disgusting.
66. Who's getting on your nerves right now
How do boring people live with themselves? If I had to listen to 30 seconds to mars and modest mouse all day I think I would die.
68. Who's getting on your nerves right now
Prisoners probably isn’t the worst movie I’ve ever seen but I hate it enough that I feel like it’s OK to cite it as such. It’s two hours longer than it has any right to be and the moral message is “it’s ok to literally torture mentally disabled people so long as you’re pretty sure they did something wrong.” Like did no one else catch on to that? Did no one think it was kind of fucked up that we were supposed to be OK with the main character putting Paul Dano in a sensory deprivation chamber?
70. Who's getting on your nerves right now
I hate people who say shit like “you don’t have to actually have written anything to call yourself a writer” like actually yeah? like that’s one of the only requirements? can we stop with this bullshit
72. Who's getting on your nerves right now
I hate how there’s no Ultimate Slur for guys. Like black people and women and gays each have their Unforgivable Curse but like what if I want to offend a straight white guy? i just can’t do it. the worst thing i can call him is like a motherfucker or a douchebag or something and that does not come close to conveying enough hatred. or if i want to insult a gay guy but not his homosexuality.
74. Who's getting on your nerves right now
I’m still not over how people tried to drag Meghan Trainor over “ripping off” some obscure kpop song from 2006 like what kind of reach.....kpop fans vastly overestimate how much literally anyone cares about kpop
76. Who's getting on your nerves right now
Can there be a decent PMD sequel at some point? It’s been like five years and two generations since the last playable one was released. Gates to Infinity certainly does not count.
78. Who's getting on your nerves right now
Do people who use the phrase “original 151″ realize how awful they are? Here’s a PSA: your life is never so bad that you deserve to associate with people who only acknowledge RBY. Show some self-respect.
80. Who's getting on your nerves right now
I hate people who try to insist that music was better in the ‘70s. Go listen to some antiquated party rock and realize how completely and unambiguously wrong you are.
82. Who's getting on your nerves right now
Nouvelle Vague’s cover of Love Will Tear Us Apart is the worst song I’ve ever heard and it combines every single musical habit I hate.
84. Who's getting on your nerves right now
Why does every cover of Let It Go modulate the last chorus? Literally the only reason that song isn’t shit is because it doesn’t do that.
86. Who's getting on your nerves right now
I feel like acapella is like jazz: everyone pretends to like it even though listening to it makes you die a little inside.
88. Who's getting on your nerves right now
Quentin Tarentino is only making movies because he wants a publicly acceptable excuse to pretend to be friends with black people. Do people not realize this?
90. Who's getting on your nerves right now
I’m so tired of Buzzfeed existing. I’m also tired of people who are like “ugh i hate buzzfeed so much I spend all my time taking quizzes” like there are a number of things more interesting than taking buzzfeed quizzes for eg watching a clock tick away the minutes until you die a boring death
92. Who's getting on your nerves right now
I really hate white gays
94. Who's getting on your nerves right now
The box set for Community is full of really awful jokes. They really should not have tried if they weren’t willing to hire someone who understood the concept of humor.
96. Who's getting on your nerves right now
I hate that I can’t call a joke “awful” without the implication being that it’s a dadjoke and I’m mocking it. Most of the humor on this website is awful ie bad atrocious disgusting dreadful horrible nasty ugly unpleasant deplorable
98. Who's getting on your nerves right now
I hate that thing that happens in every single aaron sorken ip where someone gets a phone call and goes “sorry i really gotta take this” and they run away from their fucking birthday party or award ceremony or open heart surgery or whatever the fuck way to artificially raise the stakes a-dog
100. Who's getting on your nerves right now
YOU CANNOT EXPECT A CHANGE.ORG PETITION TO FIND SOMEONE GUILTY TO DO FUCKING ANYTHING!!! WHY DOES NO ONE KNOW HOW ANY PART OF THE JUSTICE SYSTEM WORKS
34 😘
34. Who's getting on your nerves right now
The assholes who live across the hall keep having really loud chats in the hallway in the middle of the night. Like first off shut up but second off they spilled a shitload of crumbs on the floor. It looked like someone mauled a bag of chex mix. Plus they left a Vitaminwater bottle with some weird black liquid in it? And then they left it in front of my door. Like, uh, no, bitch, don’t even think about trying to put this shit on me. This happened on Friday and the cleaning staff haven’t been around because it’s the weekend so it’s just been sitting there. I don’t want to think what’s in there.
Sexiest member of one direction?
thank you for giving me another opportunity to voice my controversial "zayne isn't particularly attractive" opinion. it's one i'm very proud of
I can't fucking believe this gay guys are fucking disgusting like honestly. You're such an arrogant dickwad. The least you could do is tag the fucking uglies something more unique than fucking "boys" so I can blacklist this shit. Just the ugly ones.
babe you know you can include the hashtag in the blacklist right how often do you see “#boys” on your dash
I'm fucking Jewish you asshair
can't believe jewish hitler is riding my ass because he's jealous of my taste in boys
Melissa
One of my friend’s best friends is a Melissa, and my sister has a friend named Melissa, but I’ve never interacted much with either. Melissa #1 has a twin brother, and Melissa #2 lives in Kansas.
charlie, kelsey, joseph, anne
smooth, kinsey
There was a Charlie at my high school. I never talked to him, but I was, like, aware that he was a living human. He was on the soccer team. One of my friends reported to me that, apparently, Charlie and his best friend were complaining one time about not getting laid and ended up jerking off together. That’s…well, that’s about the most interesting thing I’ve heard about him.
I feel like there are a lot of Kelseys that are one person removed from me. Like they’re in the vicinity, but I never interact with them. One of my sister’s friends is a Kelsey. Oh, actually the family we dogsit for has a daughter my age named Kelsey. The dog’s a fluffy asshole. I think she’s been on this blog before.
There was a kid named Joseph at my lunch table. He was very into Doge, but was otherwise funny enough that I endured it. It wouldn’t be a stretch to say he was one of the smartest kids in our grade. I had math with him freshman year and English junior. I don’t think he ever spoke of his own volition during either of those classes.
Oh, the assistant rector of my church is named Ann. She’s fun. I think it’s around the time for her to leave, though, since it’s unusual to remain an assistant rector for much longer than she’s been one here. I dunno what she’s planning, though.