Just wanted to let you know how much I appreciated your post re: gay panic. I’m in my 30s and at least every 3 months I am explaining why using gay panic to squeal about your gay crush is minimally insensitive in places where older members of the community are interacting with them, if not outright offensive for how dismissive it feels to see it used so casually, especially when it is very much still in use in the original sense. Those below mid 20s really do just seem utterly clueless on this front. Sending you strength that people aren’t too awful about this.
It’s just so disappointing because in a lot of ways, some of the people most vulnerable to anti gay violence are young people. Young people of color, young sex workers, young people at bars or just innocently flirting are the victims of the violence excused by the gay panic defense.
Like the same way it’s wrong to dismiss the AIDS crisis like That Bad Thing That Happened to Old Gays, since it never ended and is still happening (again, mostly to young and/or marginalized people), acting like anti gay (and anti trans) hate crimes are over and just a thing of old or that they still happen but no one accepts “but they’re gay/trans, so effectively they deserve it” as a defense is ridiculous.
Over 1,600 anti-LGBT hate crimes were reported in 2019.
And I just… don’t get the disconnect. Because like… why don’t younger people care? Gaybashing seemed like such a real and prevalent discussion when I was younger but now so many LGBT people act like it’s all over. Homophobia ended.
And it’s like??? Is it because people aren’t leaving their houses and their only engagement with gay life is just media (mostly fanfic) and modern gay media everyone comes out and is accepted by all their friends and their parents (with the parents maybe just needing a good talking to before they accept it). Like… is that it?
Are people thinking that since they wore a pin with their pronouns on it to 4th period lunch and came out unscathed that it’s safe for everyone else?
I’m just so confused as to what changed. Cause I still see hate crimes reported on here. Is it because we haven’t had a publicized case where people use the gay panic defense? Cause like… I’m afraid to tell ya most cases aren’t publicized and many don’t even make it to court.
And that the defense is in many ways still used outside the justice system—gay bullying excused by “well he came on to me” and principles who accept that, discrimination in the workplace excused by sexualizing gay coworker and acting like they’re sexually harassing their coworkers just by existing as an out person, and so many more micro examples.
Even the fact that states are refusing to outlaw this defense should feel like a major blow to people. Should make people feel fucking scared.
Just “it’s just a meme, who does it hurt? The main victims of the gay panic defense are already dead and don’t care.”
