What I’m finding, after spending time with many sex-positive enm/cnm, polyamorous and swinger types of folks is that self awareness is sorely lacking in the real world.
From jealousy to lack of integrity to flat out cheaters - I should say I’m surprised but that’s probably more my naivety in expecting others to have done the work that I’ve already done. (In fact, they have not done hardly any work).
I’ve had a “friend” break up with me after apparent jealousy that her friends were flirting with me or asking me out on dates (it fully reeks of insecurity, but what do I know). Then a guy broke up with me, out of the blue, only for me to discover a few weeks later that he was actually already fucking a friend of mine and he was also cheating on his spouse! (I had texted him a photo of me and said friend — he did not know we knew each other. He ghosted her. And I don’t mind sharing with my friend — but I don’t tolerate cheaters. I guess he knew the gig was up when he realized we knew of each other. 😂
I am learning more and more about myself though and so these are all lessons learned. Know yourselves folks! Speak up when your boundaries are being crossed. Own your shit. Don’t tolerate what doesn’t work for you.