Dear Past Me,I know you've been wanting to live in California for a long time, it's been calling to you since you were young, but now is not the time. All that you foresee, all that you want to happen...It will end up in ruins. Few good things come from it, and you'd give up the few good things immediately if you knew what were to happen. Bide your time, plan. You don't need to rush from place to place, desperately searching for roots to keep you strong. What you need to do is nurture those roots you've already planted from afar, give them time to strengthen so they aren't quite so easily broken. I know it's hard, and I know that you have been searching for some kind of love, *any* kind of love your whole life long, but if you move now, if you take that leap into that place that seems so bright and fragrant now...all of that love, that will disappear into shadow. I know that you feel more now than you ever recall really allowing yourself to feel - that is a wonderful, wonderful thing. You've been shut down for so long, and now you have the chance to shine. Own that, but don't be quite so rash. What you feel now, that will twist and degrade into a world of pain you've not known in an age. You have love, you have roots...Whether they be from afar or not, that shouldn't matter. Hold on for just a bit longer and I promise that things will be better in the long run.Don't strike that match. Don't burn down your life and your world. Most importantly, don't hurt others in the process.
