Oct 21, 2024
just found this panel bro is really down bad
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just found this panel bro is really down bad
Background I painted for an assignment, gouache
You told me to run You said that you’d be waiting for me At the finish So I did I ran and I ran and I ran Until I finally made it
-But the running trail was an obstacle course and by the time I made it you were already gone
~C.K.// 29/3/19
The Vision - The Vision
1996
"Was loving me a joke?" For your otp
They sit in silence, long after the question is spoken. He doesn’t push for a response, instead quiet as he fidgets with his paws. It’s the first time in a long time she’s seen him so under control, so well-behaved.
A memory of him bashing down her door as she jumped from the ledge flashes in her mind, but she pushes it aside.
“No.”
The answer was simple. Is simple.
“Then why did you leave?”
The answer for that question was less so.
“I was scared.”
“Of me?”
“Of what you were becoming. You threatened to hurt Lune. You actually hurt me.”
He doesn’t respond, but they both remember the blood dripping down her head from his clawmarks. That was the same day she was stuck in the closet. The very next she jumped from her window ledge to begin her life anew. For the third time.
“Does she treat you well?”
She stops the bitterness from welling up in her chest, because she doesn’t want to hurt him. Not when she can that to his insane self. The man she loved was the one she was talking to.
“Of course. I left you for her, didn’t I?”
“Right. Have… There been others?”
She wants to scoff, but she sees her timid husband. Sees the scared and lonely teenager she married when she was a scared and lonely teenager. When they both were too young to really know what love was, but old enough to know they were deep in it.
“Only her. I swore I’d never love a man as much as I love you. I’m just happy to have found a woman to love the same way.”
She sees tears in his eyes, and the madness returning, but he’s smiling like he did when he first saw her in her wedding gown. Like when she climbed up the castle wall to his bedroom when they were young and clueless and only just beginning to love.
“I love you, Claudius.”
“I love you too, Persephone. Now go, before I call the guards.”
When the guards do arrive, she’s long gone, and the mad King has been back. But the gentle smile left over from his younger days still lingers on his lips.
Just a Cipher.
the first time I fell in love felt just like my first time behind the wheel. it was something so common, I had seen it in movies and while walking down sidewalks and I had ridden backseat watching my parents together for years. but once I was in the drivers seat, finally in the moment, nothing about it was familiar. I had to learn about all the different gears, the emergency break, the rearview mirror. I sped through reds I didn’t even notice, stopped short at yellows, and stalled at greens in sheer terror of going any further. my steering was always wobbly and timid, living scared of everyone else on the road. but eventually, I got more comfortable. no longer hitting the curb on every right turn. realizing when to use the brights, and when to slow down. I could turn on the radio, roll down the windows, and switch to cruise control. I was in love, and I was comfortable enough to just sit back and enjoy the ride. the issue with getting comfortable, though, is you begin to see the speed limit as a guideline. you begin to see stop signs as suggestions. you begin to feel completely safe. invincible, even. so I forgot to slowdown at yields. used the backup camera instead of looking behind me. paid more attention to the person in the passenger seat than I did the road in front of us. and I thought I’d be prepared for the first crash, I really did–I mean, they say it happens to everyone eventually, and I knew that. the films show them in slow motion with orchestral music in the background, and everyone ends up okay. that’s what drivers ed and romance movies taught me. but I never realized how painful airbags were until it was my head slamming into them. and I never imagined how the seat belt would dig into my shoulder, trying to hold me in place when all my body wanted was to break free. I never thought of the shattered glass, the skidding tires, the eerie silence after everything had stopped. nothing could prepare me for that. and once you have that first crash, yes, you move on–you get in the drivers seat again, you throw away the love letters and meet someone new. but you can never let yourself get comfortable. I spend an extra few seconds at every stop sign now. my hands shake as I hold the wheel. my foot hovers over the brake pedal expecting something to go wrong. because every time I pick up speed going down a hill, or find myself getting attached to someone new, all I can think of is that eerie silence. smoke rising from the hood, heart beating out of my chest, breath slow and shaky, trying not to cry. I am constantly stuck in that moment. wondering where everything went wrong, wondering how I was too blind to see it coming, wondering why I didn’t slam on the breaks fast enough or swerve out of the way in time. one second everything is fine, and the next I’m just a piece of the wreckage. the only way to completely prevent heartbreak is to never fall in love in the first place. and I guess that’s why I don’t get behind the wheel anymore.
@thehurricaneheart