#cactoid jib

[funandwhimsy]

3, Jib Janeen/Cactoid Jim

(things you said too quietly)

“Do you remember when you kissed me, that time?” Jim asks Jib Janeen’s front door. He doesn’t mean to, it just sort of spills out while he’s workin’ up the courage to knock.

 “I thought you were tryin’ to get away, and I stopped you? I’ve had a lot of time to think about it, ain’t really been able to think about much else, if I’m honest, and I don’t think that’s what you had in mind at all. Maybe I shouldn’t’ve stopped you, maybe I shouldn’t’ve brought you to Mars, maybe I shouldn’t’ve gone back to the past. I don’t have anywhere else to go,” he says, “and I think if you try again, I just might let you, and I just might like it.”

Jim shakes his head, shakes the thoughts he ain’t been able to get rid of as far away as he can get ‘em, and then he raises his fist to knock. The door swings open after he hits it once, and there’s Jib, just standin’ there, lookin’ at him.

“Were you talking to yourself out here, you silly space goose?”

“Oh!” Jim says, flushes red. “No, I was just…hummin’. Got a song stuck in my head.”

“Sure,” Jib says; Jim ain’t certain he believes him, but if he pretends, that’s good enough for Jim. “Okay, sure. Are you here to arrest me again?”

“I’m, uh, actually here to see if I might stay with you for a spell, before I head back to Mars,” he says. Jib shrugs.

“Stranger things have happened, because I’ve caused them,” he says, and swings the door open wide so Jim can come in.

[liarboo]

Got a request for Jib bothering Jim while making breakfast.

Sorry it’s so sloppy, haha.

[liarboo]

pileup.png

i actually like cactoid jim x jib so figured i’d doodle something quick after making a jupiterian design.  you can tell it’s jib by different markings and longer head tentacle thing i suppose!!!!

(also i was reading/seeing a lot about axolotls as i was researching for the design, and their pile ups that they tend to do as a group are adorable, so i like to imagine ginny and or jib just coming to a rest on top of their SO. time to pile up, sparky.)

[insanity-jane]

a vignette

shannon: i am writing a cactoid jib coffeeshop au and i regret all my life choices

me: i love you

[starlit-mansion]

I am never giving up on this, the finest of all my trash ships. Cactoid Jib 5ever.

[vrson]

Jib: so when we get like...married or whatever, would you be cactoid janeen or would I be jib jim

Jim: what

Jib: yea I mean I'm totes cool with either

Jim: you...do know my first name is not cactoid, right?

[mariusperkins]

Bounty Hunter Cactoid Jib

 I feel like Cactoid Jim has to be the bounty hunter here so:

Jim, fresh off the heels of a scandal (someone found out about his multiple families), becomes a bounty hunter

he’s good at it, he charms half the outlaws into handcuffs and shoots the other half (remember: Jim is a shoot-first-and-ask-questions-never kind of guy)

and then his next bounty is: Jib Janeen, ~superspy~~~ (actually, half the reports say he’s a dangerous superspy, and the other half say he’s terrible at it and just stole their computer passwords)

Jim chases Jib across the galaxy, but he always seems to be one step behind him

he’s actually not, Jib’s just in disguise - as the ticket clerk who tells him that Jib was on the other flight, honey, you just missed him, or as the bartender who gives him a drink on the house (”you look like you could use it, why don’tcha tell me about it huh?”), or as the informant who "accidentally” tell Jim the wrong co-ordinates 

eventually Jim does manage to track Jib down, through his kids, and he watches them for a few days to try to suss out the best way to bring Jib in

the thing is, he’s been hearing so many different things about Jib, but he never heard anything about the way Jib is so patient with his kids, coaching them through shapeshifting and settling squabbles and telling them stories

Jib knows Jim’s there of course (you don’t get to be as amazing as a spy as he is without knowing when you’re being spied on), and one day Jib sends the kids out to ask Jim to stop by for dinner

Jim says yes, of course, it would be downright rude to refuse such a kind offer

and after that he keeps stopping by to “take Jib in” and Jib will come up with some reason why he can’t possibly be arrested tonight, how about tomorrow?

like the kids are doing a special shapeshifting show at school tonight, and what kind of parent would he be if he missed that? Or it’s the last day to go and see this movie he’s been looking forward too, and how could he miss that! (and does Jim want to come see it with him?) Or he just put a roast in the oven, he can’t ask the kids to take care of it, what if they burn themselves James!

basically, that’s the story all about how Cactoid Jim: Bounty Hunter ended up dating a wanted fugitive

[camomility]

OH MAN i want to send you cactoid jib for the au meme but literally all i can think of is the coffeeshop au and that seems self indulgent but also i'm too busy to further organize my thoughts on it so maybe if you feel like it?

um yesss I am always ready for Cactoid Jib coffeeshop AUs 

so apart from what we already talked about (which I think basically amounted to ‘genderfluid purple-haired coffee shop employee Jib with dubious understanding of social boundaries’):

Okay so after Jib Facebook-stalks Jim and finds out all his favorite foods and everything (like a seriously creepy amount of data, Jib, sheesh) he asks Jim out to what turns out to be a kind of seedy pizza place, because Jib has not quiiite yet gotten the hang of adulting. (The pizza is actually really good though.) Jim just thinks Jib is super cute and also refreshingly chipper. Jib barely waits for them to finish eating before he kisses Jim -- Jib is just SO EAGER TO KISS PEOPLE.

Jim is probably a lawyer or some equally generic American job. He wants to be a politician. Jib supports him in this 100%.

I can’t even decide whether Jib’s babies are an actual set of triplets that he somehow ended up taking care of or whether they are very wriggly small dogs? I kind of like the idea that they’re small dogs. In any case, Jib ends up moving into Jim’s apartment because it is about three times the size of Jib’s apartment, and the Jiblets (whether they are humans or dogs) make a complete mess out of Jim’s furniture. Jim puts up with this good-humoredly.

Anyway, there is a lot of karaoke in this AU (as in all universes involving Cactoid Jib) and Jib wears horrible amazing spandex clothes and everything works out just great for them. Nobody goes back in time or gets married to someone else or is wanted by the police. Or... at least not the first one. Probably.