#candy first

[libertasforte]

What’s great about this is how I can totally see the Handmaid saying this about the Signless

[libertasforte]

I love these descriptions of TTs as incredibly incompetent huggers.

(I wish there was a better description of this pair of Strilondes than TTs but welp)

(2B and not 2B because Rose and Dirk combined is totally 2B, aesthetically. yeah that’s awful)

[libertasforte]

Meatverse? Meatverse? Do you copy? This is candyverse. Candyverse, distress signal: code babies. I repeat; everyone is having babies. The situation is dire. There are babies everywhere. Over.

Also, we received a Jade and we think she’s from your universe, can you confirm HOLY CRAP IT’S ALIVE? Aradia and Sollux are here too? What the Vriska -

H8y! I’m tr8pped over here and I need to SEE! Wh8t h8ppened!? Tell me!!

Wh8t!? Over here!? Kanaya and Rose raised my ancestor and she’s also named Vriska I can’t 8elieve they did this to m8! Get lost, Gamzee -

Ohhh nooo noo Vriska don’t you clownfuck wait Vriska just fuck-killed Gamzee I’M SO HAPPY I’M CRYING TEARS OF JOY. Hahahaha I’m in heaven and I see Obama.

How are the things over on your side? Over.

[libertasforte]

#CandyFirst Epilogue Impressions: Part Candy

fuck, John, girls can squeal and it doesn't have to be sexist. oh my god, they're rescuing Gamzee. I've wondered how they're going to rescue that particular ghost from the architecture. Omg Callie is so excited to save her daddy.

hmm...I really don’t like the way Callie is talking about this though.

...where the heck did you learn all this language, Gamzee? From Aranea?

Gods why is Terezi always right about everything. Hmm...I worried when I saw Rape and stuff in the tags but I forgot that at least within Homestuck personality wise the girls are a lot more likely to get that kind of thing on than the guys. Dirk? Dirk?? No. Dirk nooooooo, what the fuck no, Dirk fuck no, YOU FOOL. VRISKA ALREADY KILLED HERSELF FOR A LARGELY NONSENSICAL REASON, THAT WAS HER STUPID DECISION TO MAKE NOT YOU TOO. Oh Dirk. I suppose he actualized what his role was all along, as destroyer of self...maybe he was never that different from Vriska all along, in the sense that he can’t go on if his life has no greater purpose in cosmic events? ... Ok Gamz you successfully turned redemption into a meme, not that it wasn’t a meme already. And then everyone has babies and it is awful. Aradia and Sollux!

Yeah they totally spend their time just jumping to different timelines and attending all the funerals don’t they? They’re probably making a name for themselves across timelines as the twin gods of death. Oh hey god tier Calliope is here to protect us it’s cool that she isn’t stuck in that black hole forever I guess?

This is obviously Eridan, who’s managed to fuck everything up like the villain he is hahahaha no it’s obviously Kurloz who has a connection to Lord English pffffffft yeah right like that guy’s going to be relevant after all this time (he’s not even tagged) yeah she’s talking about Dirk isn’t she. Wait...but if they are fortunate to live in a reality that is beyond his influence...does that mean that Dirk’s suicide was in fact some sort of a heroic sacrifice for his friends? ...Ghosts start pouring in from the sky. Meenah is here, god tier Calliope is here, Aradia and Sollux are here...this universe...is somehow inside the black hole????

New information about the mysterious prince! It is a he! We can rule out all the weird timeline versions of Dirk, Eridan and Kurloz where they went transgender for some reason. (Because transgender is supposed to be a thing that happens in this story.) Also, Vriska is here and starts starts clownfucking. First Jane and now this. Gamzee is sex god. You may not like it, but he is what peak Male Heterosexual performance looks like. Anyway Vriska fuck-kills Gamzee and I’m just happy that he’s dead. According to Rose we’re in Eden. And Jake left Jane.

Holy crap, um, wow. I actually LIKE this version of Jake??? Like, actual self-awareness? And actually changing his life for the better out of his own volition and stuff. Anyway, (Vriska) jams with her ancestor while using dead Gamzee as a pillow, which I am really happy about. Um, the Gamzee being dead thing, is what I’m happy about.

Fuck Gamzee. Fuck redemption.

I like Vriska. I don’t care.

And the cycle of Vriska continues, and it is gr8.

I really jive with how Roxy talks about her gender. I guess personally this is nice for me because it makes me feel validated about choosing the aspect of Void for myself, and there’s a lot I want to say but that’s a separate post. Then Dave talks to wise sage internet priestess Obama and all he asks for is relationship advice???

And Dirk’s suicide was not a heroic sacrifice at all??

Initial thoughts. Holy hell Heterosexual Singularity? Roxygen, Davejade, Meenkat, Janejake. Rosemary is in but that’s like getting grandfathered in. This is patently due to a lack of Dirk. It’s interesting in light of -

And with all these hets and babies I keep thinking of the biological necessity - the idea that new people are born from heterosexual couples. Even Rosemary has Kanaya who’s literally a virgin mother in the troll reproduction sense, she herself individually associated with reproduction, not as a pair.

I don’t know. Davekat fell apart in this universe and - is it hard to be gay? Unless you’re someone who has a lot of control over yourself like Dirk, Rose, and Kanaya?

What the heck happened to Dirk in meatverse anyway? Given how Jake reflects Lord English... Did Hussie manage to make Dirkjake into a more tragic clusterfuck than Vrisrezi?

[libertasforte]

#CandyFirst Epilogue Impressions: Part Meat

I'm so happy Dirk is alive and talking to Dave ahhh now I need to see him talk to Rose lmao their dialogue reminds me of Reviews of Young Adult Novels by Snarp which you should go read.

:o this is the thing that god tier Calliope was foreshadowing when she talked about the Sufferer’s story! Except that was actually an explanation, but it is foreshadowing if you read it first. Anyway Dirk is narrating everything and he is alive which makes me happy.

This...this Roxy metatextually trolling Dirk with gender identity is kind of the best? I mean, not that Roxy is aware of it, but the best trolls are done when the one who is trolling is unaware that they are trolling.

I like how this...Dirk’s discomfort with viewing gender as a construct? kind of just seeps out of the too many words he uses. Like, because it makes Dirk seem uncomfortable, and Dirk is never uncomfortable. I don’t know, it’s like his humanity is managing to leak out. It’s endearing. Also he’s not dead!

This...is really beautiful. It reminds me of Adam and Eve from Nier: Automata but I really don’t know enough about the game to say how. I really would like to look into it sometime if I have time.

Dirk trying to get Jade to stop “killing herself” is incredibly ironic…is he trolling across timelines? Given that he knows what happens in the other one.

And. Wow. Alt-Calliope and Dirk. I ship it. Caliginously, I’m pretty sure. Human characters can totally get into kismessitudes and maybe Dirk is gay but it probably doesn’t matter in that quadrant and besides Calliope isn’t technically a girl in the strict sense of the word and this would be another one of the interesting things they would intellectually clash on.

It reminds me of my OTP Aravris, infinite-ego and 0-ego. Also reminds me of Rosemary. TT and a Space player. Passive-aggressive and passive-aggressive.

V wasn’t lying, it really was about Kpop all along, huh?

Why is Dirk always so right about everything

I’m actually...really happy that someone other than Jade is calling them “beta boys”? When I heard Jade use it in Candyverse...

I swear I died a little inside. And to see someone else say it...it at least assures me that at least two characters made the same decision, she is not the only one with the “sin” so to speak...

Damn, Dirk makes me uncomfortable in all the right ways.

So it looks like Dirk ascended to Monika from DDLC. Except much more effective, because he knows what he’s doing when he’s writing. Like, he’s an incredible fanfic writer. Better than I’ll ever be. It’s a Heart thing, I’m sure. And, as a fanfic writer? Way better than Calliope. Because he’s human and alive. Unlike Calliope, who is alien and dead.

Aaaaaaand I’m exhausted. Man, meat really takes a lot to chew through. It really is work. Things I’m thinking right now:

What happened between Dirk and Jake, and why does it bother Dirk? (Compare/contrast Tavris.) What is the nature of Dirk’s respect for Roxy? What are Dirk’s goals here, and how do they make him a villain? Why is Dirk the best Caliborn we never had?

Then, like zooming out to like, what are the fundamental differences between meat and candy, (fall from eden, time and aloneness). Also mental illness.

Postscript: Dirk says he will get beheaded by Dave, but...

Yeah, he’s just gonna get chainsawed in half by Kanaya, isn’t he.