Happy 18th to my BESTIE Tushhhhaaaa :)!
NOTE: this post is laced with inside jokes so it may seem a tad weird ;)
Dearest Natasha, natushiiiiii, TUSHHHHAAAA, tush-baaag, tush-fart, tushbagify, cowgirl and every other funky-dunky name I’ve given you over the years!
Fuck me where to start!? (yes I just managed to swear in the first 50 words or so :$) HAPPY BIRTHDAYYYYYYYY! Weeeeeeeeeeeooo- *poops* -- ooooooooooooooooo you’re old and shit, now you’ll get freckles and that on your penis :D
Congrats on turning the big ONE – EIGHT! Lol tbh never thought we’d stay friends till now *flashback to 48238438434324328 fights* but here we are – I told you I’m like herpes….I’ll follow you everywhere >;D Over the years I’ve seen you grow into a head-band accessoriser / cargo pant wearing nerd into a sassy *clicks fingers*, cow girl who loves “cow shooting, cow chasing, cow catching and other assorted activities”.
From your shitty days where you’re all whiny and crap to the days where you cheer me up by yodelling and dropping to the floor to show me how to run from the cops (yeah for nerds we have done quite A LOT!), I want to say thankyou for being such an amazing best friend even though I may not always let you know I think that – the bitch is strong in this one (one, being ME -.-).
You’re incredibly loyal (like hello, you almost ripped out pages of maths working out because I hadn’t done but you thought I had) and supportive in your own weird way, (but …but…you’re boobs are better?) not to mention just the random funny shit that you do (stroking eyeballs and all!). To me you are a beautiful person inside and out and anyone who doesn’t agree is dang fool who is about to be sent up the damn shit creek with no paddle and sure as hell no life jacket -.-!
From all the crazy shit we’ve been together like ‘dropping phones’ at mac square, getting kicked out of snobby german restaurants because of our poor people clothes to the infamous couch dress which I still maintain looked good…and ahhh how can we forget, ROXY HOTEL! The moment we realised im not as bad-ass as I like to think (and that you actually are! :O)
Since the end of year 10 things have passed pretty quickly, I mean we finished year 10 and the SC, finished yr 11 and year 12 and our HSC, graduated and had our formals and fuck here we are – YOU’RE 18! Time goes by so quick and when that happens we often lose sight of those most important in our lives but you should know that you ARE important to me and ALWAYS WILL BE (yes even if y’all abandon me and move to Canberra L). Not long ago you said, and I quote “one year left of school then we are free like a caterpillar from a cocoon ready to blossom & get smashed ....*sigh*” – SURPRISSSSEEEEE, time to get smaaaashhhhedddd. LOL jks, lets go watch big bang theory and teen mom with Oporto :3
This year was by far the most stressful for both of us and I’m sorry if I wasn’t always there for you when you needed me but know that without you idk what I would have done because you honestly kept me grounded and sane – whether it was assignment/test/study drama or my insane rages with jai, you always managed to be there (even if your advice was a tad generic :P LOL you were waiting for it!). I cannot count how many times I called you up asking “k so we gotta come up with a story for adv/ext 1/ext2 english….no that’s shit. Next…..no…..mmmm nope…..ooohhh actually NO.” or the “tash tash, how does this paragraph sound? [reads complicated paragraph with words over 4 syllables]” --- looool sounds familiar yes?
Well I just like to say a big ol’ thankya (admit it, y’all read that with a south western accent….you also read THAT with the accent too…HAH im in your head >:3)
Just know that wherever you go and whatever you do you’ll be amazing at it because you’re waaaaay too intelligent and determined and just overall driven to not get what you want. You really are an inspiration (yes yes, I did really say that, catch your breath ;]) and I can never repay you for all you’ve done but my awesome bday present for you is a start (trust me you’ll make love to me FOREVER when you see it – no homo.)
So in conclusion, you are the nitrogen pair of electrons in the ammonium chloride that I am…(haha geddit, coz like nitrogen lends both electrons like a coordinate covalent bond, so like you complete me and shit 8D)<--hahah looks like tiny penis :3 <---haha looks like ball sack…..oh gosh, I’m getting side tracked :/
You are the ‘this bitch’ to my ‘stoner’
You are the E to my =mc^2
You are the dang it cleetus to my brandene
You are the tush fart to my ash poop
And most importantly you are my best friend and sister, for now and forever<3
Happy Birthday Beautiful! <3