So lately I have been down, but haven't cut or hurt myself at all. I've been looking at this storm in my head waiting for the rainbow. So last week I came home from a weekend at my grandparents. Not bad, then my dad came home. Apparently he had been a prick to my step mom the whole time I was gone. And his actions said he was having an affair with a walking STD he happens to work with. My step mom confronted him, when he didn't answer she told him to move out. He refused. She asked him again, she was calm for most of this, and he got mad and lunged at her. To spare some painful details I'm just going to say I'm glad my neighbor called the cops, he saved my step moms life, cause I was too week to do so. Though I tried as hard as I could. Once the cops arrived things seemed to get a little calmer, until a cop went to arrest my dad.... Fast forward it's been a week that he has been in jail and six days since my step mom ran away. I have been left alone, no car, no job, no way to pay rent or get around in a town this size by myself. But today, today's the day I come face to face (or glass) with my dad. I am visiting him in jail to tell him what he has done to his only daughter, how alone and scared I have been, how I used to respect and look up to him, and now I am afraid of him. How it hurts me to know this man, the man I uprooted my life to come see, has once again uprooted my life and ruined everything I had going for me. I was doing interviews for jobs, I was training a puppy to be my service dog, I had a bunny and a roof over my head, I had food in my belly and didn't have to worry where I was going to sleep at night. I'm scared to tell him but I think today I am going to face my fear and show him he is done breaking people down. When this all blows over I'm changing my last name so him or his cruddy family who is on his side and won't help me will never find me. I am so done with the family I come from they don't care about any one but themselves and I am fortunately not like them. I want to start all over though I am almost nineteen I'm done, I don't need them. I have my real moms mother who is willing to help me get on my feet and I appreciate that. Soon I won't be a Norman, I will be someone new. I am a caterpillar if you will and am waiting till I come out with beautiful wings as a butterfly!