Send this dum face ⊙０⊙ and I’ll show you a canon muse I played/considered playing [closed]
A look at Maya. A look at Salvador. A look at Maya. A look at Salvador. Then at the very deceased Lot Of Bodies there is around them.
“Alright, rock-paper-scissors-sh—”
“Wait wait wait.” Salvador shakes his hands. “We go on shoot or after shoot?”
Axton looks over to Maya, shrugs. She shrugs back at him. Woah. Talk about decision-making skills. They’re both standing there like absolute morons, playing rock-paper-scissors to see who’ll push Boom (or was it Bewm?), or at least his super-dead corpse off the chair that controlled the Marvelous Piece of Artillery that is Big Bertha. See who would get to shoot the big gun.
Sure, as an ex-soldier and a turret-lover, Axton should’ve gotten first dibs. It’s only fair. He’s a pro at that kind of thing, 360-no-scope, he’s got this. But OF COURSE we got Salvador, who probably can’t even see the crosshairs since he’s so short, but god, that guy probably sings lullabies to his guns before bed, so OF COURSE he wants to try the big boom (which, it’s completely normal to sing lullabies to your turret, but for a green-rarity gun? dude, get your shit together). And Maya just. Does what Maya does.
“I ‘unno, we go on ‘shoot’? We’re gonna shoot that thing in the end, seems fitting,” the Commando says with a shrug. Sure, Axton said ‘we,’ but it’s the Royal We, because he’s the one who will shoot the Big Thing. Everyone else get fucked.
They all take a deep breath. Place one hand over their open palm, closing in a fist.
“Okay, here goes—rock-paper-scissors-SHOOT!”
...well. That’s awkward. Axton has Paper. Salvador has Rock. Maya has Scissors.
There’s a long silence. The glacier’s air blows past them as they all hold the position, trying to figure out what just happened. A weak laugh comes from directly beneath them. A bandit they thought dead raises a shaky finger, pointing at their hands, and gargles.
“Look at these dumbasses, tryin’ to make it work three ways—”
Three guns fire at once. Well, that’s. Not a head anymore. Yikes.
Axton places his hands in position again. Suspiciously eyes the other two. There’s only one way to settle this.
“Okay, seriously, we go ON shoot or AFTER shoot?”
AXTON, BORDERLANDS 2
STATUS: CONSIDERING
