My Wish list for CBS Ghosts season 5
Well first we have to tackle the elephant in the room of "Jay having been tricked into promising into selling his soul to Hell, and Elias coming to collect". This is clearly more than a 1 episode plot, but it we cannot have it run all season and still expect the show to remain lighthearted. So lets give the show 3 episodes to get Jay free from his contract
During those 3 episodes I want camp, I want slapstick comedy. Give me Sam researching crazy vudo ways to break devil curses. Maybe bring a witch doctor to the BNB
Have the ghost think Jay might die the same way one of them did. Thor uses the lights to codes "Stay inside" to Jay if the weather station predicts rain. Alberta makes disapproving humming noises if Jay tries to make himself a drink. At Issac and Flowers demand Trevor is writing "Wash your hands" and "Avoid bears" on every mirror and tablet in the house.
Hetty suggests at one point that they try to bribe Elias into letting Jay go by offering Elias some of whatever his drug of choice is. In one of his trips up top to taunt them though Elias tells them that Hell has loads of drugs. If they want him to free Jay they will have to offer him better, perhaps a replacement soul.
Have a handful of the ghost (Pete and Thor at least) consider/be willing to go to hell for Jay. But when Elias comes to collect a soul Patience senses evil again comes out of the dirt. When she see's Elias she pulls him into the dirt with her and he comes back a few hours later looking beat up. He frees Jay but says he will be back once "The vengeful and insane Puritan is sucked off".
Is it fair after that to say that I need Patience sucked off by the end of this season?
On to the more lighthearted. I need both the restaurant and Sam&Issac's book to gain success. Some fans have pointed out that Jay and Sam are getting to similar and their personal careers are a distinction. Besides that, we have only just started into the comedic potential the restaurant offers.
As far as the book goes I want it to be a success because I want Sam to get offered the chance to publish 7 more historical fiction novels. One for each of the main ghosts. Tell Thor's story using Gargoyles. I don't know what Sass would be. Alberta's now a siren. Hetty is the Baroness of the leprechauns.
Let a band stay at the BNB. What would the ghost be like at a concert? What would Sam and Jay?
Sass and Joan should start a prank war among the ghosts.
I want them to find another body, preferably one that has been long dead, buried on the property.
I want another resurrected spirit this Halloween. It's 3 years. This time let's get the spirit of a ghost who used to live on the property, but was sucked off to come back for a night.
I used to want Margaret Woodstone to come back one Halloween. But I have sense changed my mind. If she came back they would probably just say that she ran away from home, married a broke man her father disproved of, and then somehow was able to become educated and live a fairy tale life even though they were poor. I.e. they would once again make it seem like Hetty caused her own unhappiness and gave away her rights to her father and Elias in exchange for money. I am tired of the show acting like Hetty had any real choice in how her life went. Bring a ghost back who is not Margaret.
I was a little disappointed with Hetty's power being such a bottom tear one day a year. So I am hoping that they will do a Thanksgiving episode, and she will turn visible because the Irish also celebrate Thanksgiving (and 8 other holiday's)
regardless when she is next visible I need Sam's dad to come over for a visit. Hetty introduces herself as a great aunt of Sam's on her mom's side whom has gotten very well acquainted with Sam over the last few years... Sam's dad is not happy to run into a relative of his ex-wife's, and he and Hetty to get into a fight over spending time with Sam.
An episode where a nice Danish family comes to stay at the BNB. The family includes a child who can see ghosts, who keeps wanting to play with Thor.
Please please let the Fansby's go away on a romantic trip with 1 or 2 other couples. They offer to pay Sam to stop by their house once or twice a day to do basic house sitting tasks: water the plants/bring in mail/feed the cat/etc... Sam gets to meet all of the Fansby house's ghosts.
I want a "What If?" episode where we explore what life would be like if Jay was the one who fell don the stairs and gained the ability to see ghosts instead of Sam.
At least a B-plot from Nancy's point of view of her sneaking up stairs to spy on those weirdo 8 ghosts and their crazy livings then bringing the gossip back down to her basement friends. Maybe the basement ghost hatch plans to mess with the main 8. Include Nancy's relationship with Staurt and flesh out a couple more basement characters like Creepy Derek and the girl he is "basement Buddies" with.
Have a middle aged, and familiar looking guest come to the BNB and check in under the last name "Montero". That is Flower's last name. This guy is her nephew. Flower gets super excited and gives Sam a list of questions to ask Mr. Montero about his Dad, any siblings he has, his thoughts on weed. The guy at one point during Sam's questioning says he was actually adopted as a baby. Everyone basically goes "Oh okay". The he drops a bomb by saying that he was adopted by his biological uncle. His birth mother's name was Susan Montero. He knows that she died on this property and that Sam seems to know a lot about her.
We have to get Sass's death at some point this season. After last season I have kinda stopped expecting him to have some big and dramatic death. (Let's be real the show will never top "Holes Are Bad"). Some fans have suggested he might have died in his sleep from an unknown cause and I am starting to lean in to that'
If that is the case though I want the reveal episode to be a complete reverse of "Holes are bad". Like Sam realizes she doesn't know Sass's death story yet and asks him. Sass gives her a really big and dramatic death where he died saving his wife/child from an attacker. Sam gets emotional and runs to tell the story to Jay. Jay looks confused and asks "How did Sass have a wife/child when he was a virgin until recently?". Behind them a Ghost laughs and says that they watched "insert random Disney movie" the night before and Sass was just pretending to be "Insert random dead Disney parent". The ghosts then tell Sam that Sass tells them a different story every time they ask about how he died. They used look for any similarities in his stories to try and peace together an actual cause, but since none of them could hold a pen they had to keep track from memory which is hard. Then since Sam can write all the ghosts start randomly asking Sass how he died and telling her the details of any story he gives to write down. Sass guesses what they are doing and at first he just gives them increasingly different stories until he finally gets sick of being bothered. He calls everyone in and admits that his real story is just "I went to sleep as a living, and woke up the later as a ghost". He made those death stories up because everyone told stories about how they died and he did not want to have the most boring death. Flower or Trevor then points out to him that most of them died being stupid, so he has nothing to be jealous over.
I want an episode where Issac gets told that even if the book is a success that it is really unlikely it will ever get made into a musical. So then Issac wants the ghosts to make a play/musical out of the book and put it on in the ballroom. The ghosts agree to do this But if this happens I have specifics I want . 1.) Issac is not allowed to play himself. He either has to play a really minor role, or he has to play Hamilton (Whichever one he would hate more). 2.) Cat fight between Hetty and Alberta over the role of Beatrice, since she is technically the lead lady. 3.) The British shed ghosts learn about this and show up insisting that they get to play the British werewolf's, going as far as to sight "cultural appropriation" if they are not given the parts. The other ghosts give in. 4.) We find out that since the book has been changed to a work of fiction, Sam and Issac took some liberties and made Higgintooth a lot more aware of his sexuality than Issac was back then. In the book his character was romantically involved with his friend Edmund.
Now on to wishes from the shipping. *Puts hand on forehead and sighs dramatically*. The show once again has most of the characters in couples, and the 3 single ghosts have established love interests so we will probably get a lot of shipping based episodes. We will probably also get some break ups, because that is how you do drama in T.V. Sitcoms. So here is my wish list for this.
break up the episodes that are mostly about shipping so that they are not one after the other.
Also still have episode story lines to the platonic/family relationships in the show
Have one episode where it is Sam and Jay's anniversary and in a twist of the norm the main 8 try to plan something nice for them on their special day. It backfires horribly
Pete and Alberta are a couple now. I am not sure how the show will handle them as a couple. What will be their version of Thor&Flower both loving owls? Watching wrestling? Fantasy games?
Pete&Albeta and Carol&Baxter winding up stuck on a double date or having to share a table at a social event could either be really cringe or comically awkward. Both scenarios work in this show
I need at least one more episode where they help Sam and Jay do something deviant, and technically illegal, but victimless. Similar to the wine tasting back in season 2.
Break Bela and Eric up, but let Eric be the one to break up with Bela. Maybe he got a full time job in the country he has been doing humanitarian work in. He wants him and Bela to get married and move there together. Bela is not ready to get married and unwilling to move countries. So Eric breaks things off with her and moves by himself. I want Bela to be sad because that was her longest ever relationship, and I want Trevor to comfort her as a friend
Since Hetty got to go on a date last season it is Trevor's turn now. Pete mentioned knowing a cave women that he thinks Trevor would get along great with if he could overlook her bushy eyebrows. I want that that to be another roaming ghost that Pete knows. Since pairing up Sass&Joan worked out so well Pete brings the cave women over and introduce her to Trevor. Trevor is not that into her at first, the eyebrows and all, but later on they start to hit it off and hook up. The next day though have the cave women leave because even if she likes Trevor she is just not looking for a full relationship. Trevor is disappointed. The other ghosts cheer him up.
I have a bad feeling that Sass and Joan will not last. They are the least built up couple on the show and if the writers are going to break up a main couple it will probably be them. If they do end, please let it be because Joan got sucked off. No messy or bad break up. The show owes Sass that at least after the way they treated him last season.
I also feel like the show at some point probably will circle back to Flower&Thor potentially having a threesome with another ghost... and I will be honest: at this point in the show I am for it. Thor and Flower have dated for around 3 years now, they've said "I love you", supported each other through some hard realizations, and moved in together. They are a lot more solid than they were when Flower came out of the well in season 3. They have also said that they both like being watched. I can now better believe that they would mutually decide to engage in a threesome for fun, and not because Flower is scared to love and Thor is desperate to keep her.
But I need the third to be with a visiting ghost: a Poltergeist, a Roaming ghost (not Pete or Joan!), or Halloween night. No ghosts who "live" on the property and whom they see regularly. Have Thor and Flower enjoy it, but decide for it to be more of an annual treat, rather than a peppermint change to their relationship
Nissac.... Nissac. If you have seen any of my posts you know that I do not like these two together. They have no trust between them. That I do not consider Nigel to be a gentleman; in fact he is as sleezey and as big a liar as Carol. Lastly I hate how Issac would verbally state multiple times that he did not like the way Nigel treated him or his friends, but that he had to go along with it because Nigel was his "only option". All this stated I know that Nissac are getting back together. First they have to get better
Chris became a roaming ghost, so he will have to come back at some point. He has actually probably been back multiple times already, Issac just hasn't seen him yet. Also I do not know why some people think Nigel actually liked Chris. To me it was very clear that he was trying to cockblock/make Issac jealous. Well lets have Chris come back for a couple days and Issac see's him. Issac tries to keep Chris away from the shed and Nigel. Chris wants to head to the shed, and when Issac tells him "well they all think you left months ago" Chris replies with "Oh no they know I come back every few days/week or so. In fact one of them is probably expecting me."
Issac believes that means Nigel and Chris are a item now and sadly walks off. On his walk he runs into Nigel who is noticably alone. Issac asks where Chris is. Nigel asks what Issac is talking about, Chris left moths ago. Issac "No he's back now I know you to are together. You should go see him before he leaves again". Nigel says okay and walks off but he noticeably ducks behind a tree. Issac pretends to walk off before hiding behind another tree and watches Nigel come back then jumps out "Aha. Why aren't you going back to the shed". Nigel is startled then admits that he is not going back to the shed because Jenkins and Chris are making out there. This confuses Issac even more because as far as he knows Jenkins is completely hung up on Nigel. Nigel just says "Not when Chris is here", which makes Issac think Jenkins is either cheating on Nigel or dumped him for Chris. Issac comforts Nigel and the two share a kiss and seemingly get back together
Later on Issac see's Chris and Jenkins saying good bye and goes to yell at Jenkins for "Playing with Nigel's heart" as he believes Jenkins has done by chasing after him for so long only to throw him to the wayside for a "trist" with Chris. Jenkins gets annoyed and finally spills the beans to Issac. Nigel is poly, has been poly since they were all livings and all through their time as ghosts. That is how he has such "a high body count". Issac and Jenkins are not the only ghosts he has relations with. Does Issac really know nothing about any other ghosts besides his 7 friends? Lastly Jenkins tells Issac "You always acted like you were more special the the rest of us. But you were just his newest addition."
Issac goes to confront Nigel who tries to deny it at first but when he see's Issac does not believe hm admits that yes he has around 6 partners: Jenkins, Issac, a couple basement ghosts, and a couple from neighboring ghost boundaries. Nigel argues to Issac that monogamy was for women in their time, and according to Carol, who is married to Baxter but is also sleeping with Nancy and Crash, it has since become even more obsolete. Issac just tells Nigel that Carol does not speak for all relationships and he does not want to be "just an addition to a harem"
Issac and Nigel do not see each other until the play/musical episode. While playing the werewolfs something upsets Nigel and he walks off. Issac follows him. He believes Nigel is upset about the wearwolves losing the war and tries to kid him "Your side lost, you know that. You gave it a good fight though, it wasn't an easy victory for us yanks". Nigel turns around and yells at Issac "Why did you lie to me?". Issac asks how did he lie. Nigel says "You told me I was your first and only real paramour. But you were romantically involved with your friend Edmund. I saw it on stage". Issac explains that is a fictional change he and Sam made to the book. Issac says that when he looks back he probably did have somewhat of a crush on Edmund, but Edmund was straight, Issac was legally married to Beatrice, and the pair were just friends. Afterwards Issac asks Nigel "Why do you care if I was with someone else before you. You have been with so many other man. Before me, while we were together, and after." Nigel quietly admits "You were different. You were my favorite". Issac says "We cannot get back together unless you agree to me being your only". Nigel agrees. They get back together.
