Pinkie had just returned from a relatively short trip to dreamland. She sat up in the bed she was in, stretching her forelegs out.As she let them drop onto her sheets she smacked her lips together. Let’s see. Not dreaming, which means that it’s tomorrow. And if it’s tomorrow, then it means there are fun things to do. Pinkie looked out a nearby window. The sun had not yet risen leaving Equestria in darkness. Stars still dotted the sky and a slight wave of orange was creeping up over the horizon.
Huh, I guess it’s not tomorrow yet. Pinkie shrugged. Oh well! Might as well start tomorrow early. She brought her hind legs to her right, preparing to slide out of bed. A foreleg wrapped around her waist tugged at her. Pinkie lifted the sheets and found a slender white foreleg holding onto her. She turned her head to her companion. Lying in the bed with her was the elder of the two diarchs of the country. She was missing all of her regalia and her ordinarily freely flowing mane lied flat against her head. The princess slowly opened her visible eye.
“Where do you think you’re going?” she asked.
“It’s a new day,” Pinkie replied, turning herself back to face her companion. “And a new day means that there are new things to do, Sunny.”
“Speaking of which, isn’t it best to do that now?”
“There’s still time.”
“If you say so.” Pinkie started to move to the edge of the bed. Celestia grabbed onto her chest, gently pushing her back down onto the mattress. Pinkie tried to lift herself up but was pushed back down. “Sunny! Stop that!” she wailed, frantically waving her forelegs.
“You are absolutely adorable when you do that, why would I stop?” Celestia giggled. “Would you mind staying with me for a bit? This bed is awfully big for a single pony, even if it’s a pony of my stature.”
“I’d love to, really but there’s so much that I can do! I could wander through the castle halls, I could pull pranks of all of the Royal Guard and Blueblood at the same time, I could bake up enough cupcakes to feed a tenth of the city’s population, and I could make at least ten dozen ponies smile! And as much as I love being here being held by you, I can’t do any of that while lying in bed with…” Pinkie’s rant stopped short as Celestia pressed her lips to her own. Her eye lids slowly fluttered close as a warmth spread throughout her body from her lips. Celestia lifted herself off Pinkie, separating the two. Pinkie looked up and found a doting smile. “Maybe a few minutes more won’t hurt.”
“I’m glad you see things my way.” Celestia flopped down into the bed as Pinkie slid herself down into the covers. She wrapped her forelegs around Pinkie and pulled her close to her chest. Celestia buried her muzzle into Pinkie’s mane letting out a content sigh. Pinkie sighed along with her as a content smile stretched across her face.
I really liked the bits of Pinkie's thoughts we got to start the day, and the image of Celestia in bed, her mane flat, was really nice. The whole thing gave the image of a nice, calm morning. And I liked Celestia's line about how she knew the morning hadn't started yet cause it's her job to start it (She should be a bit less pushy, though! She said stop, Celestia.). I love that Pinkie calls her "Sunny," too, that's really cute. Nice work!
Sneaking around was something that Pinkie did fairly often thanks to her special talent. It was her job to surprise ponies, and the best way to do that was behind their backs when they weren’t paying attention. As such, moving around unnoticed became as easy as breathing for her. Of course, she never used her talents for evil purposes. Pinkie would only use them for preparing surprise parties and pulling pranks. Unfortunately for her, desire had told her to do something nefarious with her abilities.
“Let’s see,” she said. “Step one: know where your target is.” Pinkie pushed a periscope out of the bush. From the lens, she could see one of the towers with a single skylight on a brass roof. A series of lights shined from inside. Pinkie dropped the periscope. “Check. Step two: have something to help you blend in.” She opened a pair of saddlebags beside her and pulled out a black turtleneck sweater, quickly pulling it over herself.
“Check,” Pinkie continued. “Step three: have the proper equipment.” Again she reached into the bag. She pulled out her night vision goggles and a grappling hook inside a miniature cannon. “Check.”
“Step four.” Pinkie placed her goggles over her eyes. “Have something to distract the guards.” She looked inside her bags. “Check. And step five: have an escape plan. Check.” Pinkie wrapped her bags around herself, picking up the cannon. She placed a pair of headphones over her ears.
“Now for some mood music.” Pinkie tapped the headphones. “Hmm, nah, this would work if this was a BAMF moment. Next.” She tapped the headphones again. “Oh! This would be great for a hardboiled monologue, but not for a heist. One more time.” For the third time, she tapped her headphones. Pinkie bobbed her head along with the beat.
“That’s better.” Pinkie hopped out of the bush towards the wall. She placed her back up against the wall with a sly smile on her face. She held the cannon up and pushed a button on it. The grappling hook shot up the wall, hooking onto its ledge. Pinkie pushed the button a second time, making the cannon pull her upwards. Once the grappling hook returned to the cannon’s barrel, she back flipped in the air to the wall. Pinkie turned her head. None of the guards on the wall seemed to notice her. She silently ran on the wall towards the end.
Pinkie jumped off the edge towards another wall. She landed with a dull thud, leaving her standing in front of a pegasus guard.
“What are you doing here?” he sternly asked. In response, Pinkie reached into her saddlebag. She held out her hoof with a cupcake with blue and pink frosting on it.
“Does this cupcake taste like chloroform?” she asked.
The guard blinked. “Excuse me?”
“Sorry, I meant does it taste like happiness?” Pinkie shoved the cupcake into the guard’s mouth. He stumbled back with crumbs falling out of his mouth.
“What are you…” the guard stopped. He chewed on the cupcake with his pupils growing with each movement from his mouth. “Sweet Luna.” He swallowed making a smile far too big for his face to appear. The guard stood in pure amazement as Pinkie quickly walked past him.
She stood a few feet away from the base of the tower. With a steady hoof, she aimed her cannon at the roof before firing. Unlike the first time, the hook circled around a thin pole sitting at the top. Pinkie pulled herself onto roof, her hooves gently clicking against the brass. From the skylight, she could hear running water. Pinkie peered inside and found a large bedroom with an open canopy four poster bed directly under the skylight. Across from the bed was a desk with a few scattered documents on its surface. The water stopped and the solar princess stepped into the room. She yawned, stretching her wings. As the princess walked to her bed, she removed her regalia, placing them and her crown on the desk. She crawled under the covers, lighting her horn. The light faded away leaving her in darkness. She yawned again slowly closing her eyes. Her chest moved in a steady rhythm.
Pinkie’s eyes sparkled. She placed her saddlebags down and opened them again. She pulled out a black nylon rope. Pinkie undid the latch closing the skylight. She pulled it open with its hinges creaking. Pinkie winced. When she looked inside, she saw that the princess’ slumber had not been disturbed. She sighed in relief and tied the rope to the pole. Pinkie dropped the rope down the skylight. She tangled one of her hind legs in the rope and slowly descended into the bedroom.
As she lowered herself over the bed, Pinkie lifted her goggles. The bedroom’s owner was still fast asleep. The sly smile reappeared while she reached her forelegs out. The sleeping pony was nearly within her reach when she cracked her eyes open. Pinkie panicked as she saw a smile grace the princess’ face. She reached out, grabbing Pinkie. Celestia lifted herself up and pressed her lips against Pinkie’s. Pinkie struggled for a fraction of a second before giving in. Celestia lied back down in her bed with a confident smirk. Pinkie pulled her headphones back.
[Time Limit Reached]
“How’d you know I was here?” she asked.
“Your music is rater loud,” Celestia answered. “I heard it while you were on the roof. Nice choice in music, by the way. It really works for a heist.”
“I know, right?!” Pinkie tapped her headphones turning off the music. Pinkie was pulled off the rope onto the bed. Celestia removed her sweater and goggles. She pinned the pink pony down with a playful smile.
“Pinkamena Diane Pie,” Celestia said. “You’ve been caught red hoofed trying to steal a kiss from one of the rulers of Equestria. Do you have any idea what the consequences for that are?” Pinkie shook her head. “Here, let me show you.”
------
Comments by Kyronea:
That's a pretty long way to go just for a bit of romantic roleplay there, Pinkie. But then Celestia is probably into intricate acts of cloak-and-dagger schemes, being quite the political schemer herself. It's interesting how you chose to frame the story as Pinkie's "Alpha Protocol" being sneaking around, but I would actually argue it's instead her desire to make people smile, to make them feel happy. I mean that seems to have been the whole point here, Pinkie sneaking in to kiss Celestia. It's set up as though she's going to steal something valuable when instead it's a romantic gesture. So, nice twist there.
Incidentally, as a personal recommendation: you might want to cut it out with the music links. Very few people are actually willing to listen to recommended music while reading something; trying to force a certain tone on your reader isn't going to work. It's better to let the piece speak for itself, let them get out of it what they want to get out of it. If you're using the music to shore up what you feel is a failing of your work, that only says you need to step up the writing quality.
The celebration lasted three whole days. Princess Celestia’s birthday celebrations were a time of nationwide festivities, with ponies from all over paying tribute to their Solar monarch. The celebration was particularly enthusiastic in Canterlot, with the streets filled with wellwishers cheering, singing, laughing and dancing.
Watching over the celebrations from the balcony of Canterlot Castle, Celestia waved to the cheering crowds with her usual, motherly smile. Her wings unfurled, her horn aglow, the sunshine bright and dazzling in the clear blue sky, she stood to address the revelling crowds.
“Citizens of Equestria, we have reached the third and final day of our festival, the day of my actual birthday!” Cheers greeted her at the declaration. She moved on with her speech.
“I thank you all for your gifts and your well-wishing as I celebrate my…well…let’s permit me SOME secrets. It’s rude to ask a lady her age, after all!” The crowd laughed at this.
“As we move into our third day, I ask that you keep on enjoying yourselves to the fullest! You all, my dear little ponies, you all make raising the sun each day worth it. Thank you, and party on!”
“Happy birthday to me…happy birthday to me…” A tear fell, joined by another, and then a small stream of them running down her muzzle. “Why do I bother even remembering each one? How many thousands of years have passed so far? It hardly makes a difference now. Another year gone, another reminder of how much older I am than my little ponies, and how may have gone before, to say nothing of how may I will yet lose.”
She floated over a slice of incredibly perfect birthday cake and bit into it, sniffling slightly.
“It’s not like I can stop caring about them. What kind of ruler wouldn’t care about their subjects?”
“A big old meanie-bo-beanie pants! That’s what!” Came a sudden interruption. Celestia whirled around, ready to call her guards when she suddenly realised she recognised the voice. She was startled by the sudden presence of two big, bright, expressive eyes right in her face.
“Pinkie Pie? How did...Uh, I mean, it’s a pleasure to see you, dear, but what are you doing here?”
“Weeeeeeell…I WAS going to deliver my super-secret-super-special-super-surprise-party especially for you while Twilight was visiting her family, Fluttershy was visiting the animals in the park, Rarity was shopping, Rainbow Dash was at the Wonderbolts Museum and Applejack was selling apples, and I needed to see your room to set everything up for the surprise later, but then I saw you were all frowny-faced so I thought I’d help you smile again!”
Celestia had to admit that Pinkie’s enthusiasm and happiness were rather infectious. Such was the nature of the Element of Laughter. As delighted as she was by the party pony’s antics, however, it didn’t eliminate that growing knot inside her, that font of sadness at the reminder of her age and the mortality of all the ponies she used to know. She looked down at her hooves and shuffled on her bed, and was suddenly joined on the bed by Pinkie Pie, who was looking more concerned than smiling.
“So…you wanna talk about what’s wrong? Can’t make you feel better if I don’t know what’s the matter! Come on! Tell your dear old Auntie Pinkie Pie all about it!”
“Pinkie Pie, I’m many years olde-“
“Come on! You can tell me!” Celestia sighed at Pinkie Pie. The bane of the laws of physics that sat beside her just radiated warmth and happiness in a way few ponies could match, and she let out another sigh.
“Well, my little pony, you have to understand something. I am old. VERY old.”
“You don’t look that old!”
“I’m trying to explain, Pinkie.”
“Oh, right, sorry.”
“Anyway, I am very very very old, thousands of years, if not more. It’s sometimes hard to remember exactly how many. I am immortal, and that means that everypony I ever get to know, I have to lose one day. It never stops hurting, every time I remember somepony who mattered to me.”
“Wow…I never thought about that…you must really miss them, huh?”
“More than you know, dear.”
“Hmm…well…then why do you get to know ponies at all? Why make friends with them?”
“If I did not, life would be unbearably lonely, Pinkie. That and as you correctly pointed out, a ruler who did not care about her subjects is a poor ruler indeed.”
“Well yeah, but I mean why do you make friends? Close ones like Twilight. You can be nice to ponies you look after, but you don’t have to get, like, really SUPER close with them! You treat Twilight like a daughter!”
“That is true. I suppose I hadn’t really thought about it. I would have to say it’s because being friends with somepony is what makes life worth living.”
“Exactly! You need friends to make things fun!”
“But then one day I have to say goodbye, while I just keep on going, and keep on hurting.”
“Well, yeah, losing somepony who is a friend hurts really really bad, but that’s nothing compared to how good it feels being their friend in the first place! You get to do all kinds of cool fun stuff, like pranks, parties, games, eating contests…”
“And when they’re gone…”
“You remember how much fun it was, and you say goodbye, and yeah, you are sad for a while because you were, like, super-awesome friends, but then you make new ones, and be happy again1 Your friends would want you to be happy, so BE happy!”
Celestia considered Pinkie’s words. It seemed so obvious once it was said, but in all her time running the country, it was something that was easy to forget.
“Pinkie…how did you get to be so wise?” Pinkie beamed a huge, ear to ear smile at Celestia.
“I have no idea!” Celestia laughed uproariously, genuinely amused, and feeling much happier.
\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/
After several hours of chatting, including may nostalgic remembrances of friends long past, Celestia and Pinkie got up and headed for the kitchen. Celestia grinned at Pinkie’s huge smile – she had told her of the enormous ten layer cake made especially for her, and had every intention of sharing it with her.
“Pinkie…could I ask a favour of you?” Celestia asked.
“Sure!”
“Do you think you could come over to Canterlot more often? I could do with some cheering up after particularly trying days, and I’d be delighted to share some cake and pranking time with you more often.”
“Oooh! Sure! A Princess pranking partner! Dashie will be SOOO jealous!” Pinkie grinned a menacing grin at the thought of the pranks she could pull.
“I’m glad, Pinkie. How about this time next week?”
“Okie dokie lokie!”
“I want to thank you, Pinkie. I’ve not enjoyed a birthday for many centuries now, but I think I shall be enjoying them in future thanks to you.” Celestia wrapped a wing around Pinkie and hugged her close, giving her an affectionate nuzzle. “I owe you a great deal.”
“Awww, that’s OK Princess! We all love you so much! We just want you to be happy!”
“Still, this was above and beyond what most ponies would do for somepony else’s happiness.”
“It’s what I do, Princess! Smile smile smile!”
“Pinkie…few have cared for my feelings as much as you have today. I was honoured to call those before my Special Someponies. I wonder if…well…would you care to…be mine?” Celestia asked with a blush on her cheeks. “You could be my official Minister of Parties!”
“Princess, I’d love to!”
\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/
“And then we kissed lots!” Pinkie said with a giggle to her audience. “And that’s how I spent the birthday festival!”
“Uh…yeah, I’m not buying it.” Rainbow Dash deadpanned.
“I agree, darling, that story seemed a bit…silly. The romance was rushed and Celestia’s depression seems so unrealistic.” Rarity added.
“I would notice if something was wrong with Celestia like that.” Twilight said matter-of-factly.
Pinkie frowned, before perking back up again. “Eh, whatever!”
As her friends left, Pinkie waved goodbye to each one, before closing the front door of Sugar Cube Corner.
“OK! It’s clear!” A sudden burst of light, and Celestia was stood in the middle of Sugar Cube Corner, her invisibility spell dispelled.
“Hello again dear!” Celestia said with a happy nuzzle.
“Hiya Princess C!” Pinkie kissed Celestia’s muzzle gently with a blush.
“I don’t think that story was totally accurate. We didn’t kiss quite that soon, as I recall. There were more dates, for one.”
“OK, so I couldn’t wait to get to the really good bit! Anyway, more snuggling and kissy time?”
“Lead the way, dear!
And then they kissed. Lots.
Krizak Comments!
And this is why my favourite near-nonexistent ship is CelestiaPie. It's the way Pinkie can be a breath of fresh air and spontaneity in the immortal alicorn's life in a way no other pony could ever manage. I was greatly amused by the double twist at the end, how it all seems like a story Pinkie made up and then nope! It's just one she edited a little for the sake of time. The sentiments shared between Pinkie and Princess Celestia were also lovely, and the ending line is what all shipping stories should end with.
