soft trans girls
I shall become a collector of me) I walk through the streets) the sun shining on me especially different) to survive and thrive) to simply be well) you gotta put in the work) My body has a memory of grief while on “American” soil) I know this racism, my bones know this well) What I want is to not be a StrongBlackWoman just because I am a Black Trans Woman who happens to be Strong) I want a chance to be soft) To be tender and act from that tenderness) The safe space from which one expects to be handled as if they are precious) Trust that I have no reason to speak from any place but my fully seated self) All of which were powerful, remained gentle) I want to know what it feels like to be able to remain fully seated in my body) softness is NOT about respectability politics, a certain appearance, widely standardized femininity, money, luxury, or being bougie) Make space for your softness) The opposite of softness is a society that forces Black women to be hard and to only feel safe when being firm, being considered harsh, trusting a lurid disposition, and leaning into the sharpness of life. Being pulled from the seated self to be framed as the aggressor. The opposite of soft is the world’s expectation that we will unseat ourselves to be their expectation of “strength” and that to say something “powerful”, I would have to get out of my spiritual inner seat and my literal seat to speak. You do not have to be a fire for every mountain blocking you. You could be a water and soft river your way to freedom too) being water versus having to burn everything down to get to freedom) the possibility) a chance to be soft) what I deserve is to be able to find safety for myself in ways that don’t require me to sacrifice my ease, calm, sacred seat, or my softness) The “StrongBlackWoman” trope is especially detrimental to Black trans women’s physical and emotional wellbeing) Society places ((this expectation)) on Black trans women to engage in unhealthy, self-sacrificing behavior while ((our needs our ignored, while our lives are exploited, while)) they pretend as if the Black trans woman is not suffering) society expects Black trans women to, in humble compliance, perform and survive grim and arduous tasks with superhuman strength) We are even socialized into describing ourselves as strong) a badge of honor) I wonder who other Black trans girls and Black trans women will get to be if we create soft realities for ourselves) Our softness does not negate our strength whatsoever) Our journey towards that kind of profound, transformative, revolutionary.
- Anonsee Storyweaver
Cento arrangement of the chapter In Pursuit of Softness from All The Black Girls Are Activists by ebonyjanice. This is a Cento, akin to blackout poetry - the primary changes are formatting, tense/possessive changes, if more than a single word is added, it is denoted within double parenthesis. If I feel the message of a full paragraph should be heard in this, the full paragraph has been pulled forward in italics even if format has changed.
The series of Centos from this book are focused on ensuring Black transfemmes recognize themselves within Feminist/Womanist theory and commentary, as many feel implicitly excluded or not thought of/considered when reading theory not written by transfemmes due to the unique effects of transmisogyny and transmisogynoir on our lives.
