#cerinsposts

[cerinslair]

I wish tabletop RPG players would interrogate their use of the word "campaign."

[cerinslair]

Oath of the Courier

A paladin subclass for 5e

Liberty. Reason. Justice. Civility. Edification. Perfection.

MAIL.

Tenets of the Courier

The Tenets of the Courier embody a paladin's commitment to delivering the mail with utmost integrity and professionalism.

Handle with Care: Treat anything entrusted to you as preciously as you would your own possessions.

Discrete Delivery: When others confide in you, do not betray their trust. Let none but the intended recipient pry upon what you carry.

Swift Postage: Do your best to fulfill your promises as promptly as possible. Punctuality is a virtue.

To the Letter: Strive to fulfill your oaths exactly as you pledged them. Your word is your promise.

Oath Spells

You gain oath spells at the paladin levels listed.

3rd Level: Expeditious Retreat, Illusory Script 5th Level: Animal Messenger, Arcane Lock 9th Level: Sending, Tongues 13th Level: Legally Distinct Secret Chest, Freedom of Movement 17th Level: Dream, Teleportation Circle

Channel Divinity

When you choose this Oath at 3rd-level, you gain the following two Channel Divinity options:

Postage Stamp: As an action, you mark an object with a magical postage stamp. When creating this stamp, you choose a creature you or an adjacent ally are familiar with to be the object's recipient. This stamp persists for a number of hours equal to twice your paladin level, until the stamped object is delivered to its chosen recipient, or it is dismissed as a bonus action. While holding the stamped object, you can spend an action to magically detect what direction its recipient is in, and approximately how far away they are from you. If the recipient does not want to be located by you, it can make a Wisdom Saving Throw to elude this detection. If you are relying on an ally's familiarity, they get Advantage on this save. If they succeed, they are immune to this effect for 24 hours. You may only have one magical stamp at a time. If you place another, the previous one is immediately dismissed.

This Side Up: As an action, you can use your Channel Divinity to ward a creature or object against toppling. One creature or object within 10 feet becomes immune to the Prone condition. If the target is an object, it must be light enough for you to carry. If the target is an object, it gains Resistance to bludgeoning, force, and thunder damage. If the warded creature or object falls, it may ignore the first 10' of the fall when determining fall damage. These effects last for a number of minutes equal to your Charisma score, minimum 3.

Aura of Determination

Neither rain nor sleet nor hail will stop your delivery of the mail. Starting at 7th level, you emit an Aura of Determination. You and allies within 10' cannot have their speed reduced to less than their base speed when walking, crawling, jumping, or flying. This includes anything that would halve movement, such as Difficult Terrain or Exhaustion; or impose any other fraction-based penalty to speed. You cannot grant any of these effects while you are unconscious.

At 18th level, the range of this aura increases to 30 feet.

Return to Sender

Starting at 15th level, if you are targeted by a spell that targets only you, you may use your Reaction to instead have the spell target its caster. Use the original caster's Spell Save DC, Spell Attack Bonus, and Spellcasting Ability where applicable. If the spell required a Spell Attack Roll, re-roll the attack versus the caster. Once you use this ability, you must finish a short or long rest before you can use it again.

Pen Pal

At 20th level, you can assume the form of a celestial courier. Using your action, you undergo a transformation that grants you the following benefits for 1 hour:

Wings sprout from your back and grant you a flying speed of 60 feet.

Allies who begin their turn within 30' of you gain a 10' bonus to their speed that turn.

Add your Charisma bonus to your Initiative Rolls.

Once you use this feature, you can't use it again until you finish a long rest.

Go forth, swift and trustworthy courier! You are the glue that holds society together!

[cerinslair]

Putting these up on the shelf until a recurring type of numbskull's tiny worldview expands enough to actually contribute anything worthwhile to the conversation. Or can at least respect the boundaries of folks who share a table with them.

[cerinslair]

Clashing Antagonists

Something that I find extremely useful when running a long-form TTRPG is to have not only multiple antagonists, but to have those antagonists be at odds with each other in addition to the player characters.

And I don't just mean as an opportunity for "enemy of my enemy" type diplomacy, alliances, inevitable betrayals, or faction-based game play (although that can also be a bonus, it's not necessarily the function I'm getting at).

I mean as a narrative tool to help keep the story moving in a gratifying way.

Players get stuck while trying to figure out what to do about Villain A? Have them run into Villain B. It spurs motion back into the story, while carrying more narrative weight than a random encounter. Sometimes they'll even elect to switch priorities between villains all on their own if they feel like they've hit a dead end with one or the other; or just feel like it's been too long since they kept tabs on the other villain.

It allows you to change the status quo when things get stuck in a way that isn't just giving the players the answer or fudging dice rolls, and maintains the PCs agency in the game. Maybe once they've caught up with Villain B and foiled their scheme of the day, the issue they were having with Villain A just isn't even relevant anymore. Or maybe they learn something from V.B. they can use to get back on track with foiling V.A.

It creates opportunities for the players to learn more about the villains. Again, not just via "enemy of my enemy" diplomacy - if Villain A keeps tripping up Villain B, seeing that in action or even the aftermath of it can grant the players new insight into both V.A. and V.B. You made these cool bad guys, and you wanna show them off! This is another way of doing that that isn't having the antagonists monologue at the PCs.

This can also help diversify the types of enemies your PCs encounter, even if you don't want multiple groups of villains. You can still make this work by having infighting factions within one overarching group. In the Pokémon TTRPG I've been running, the two branches of the villainous team (a mad scientist branch and an occult branch) are supposed to be working together; but in practice, they mostly compete with each other to prove to their Big Boss that their version of the evil plan is better.

It also creates more opportunities for the PCs to see the effects their choices have on the story. Swat down V.A. hard enough and maybe V.B. has more opportunity to grow in power. Maybe if the PCs can keep both villains occupied fighting each other long enough, they can afford to turn their attention to some other important objective for a while. Sometimes there will be tough decisions over which antagonist to pay more attention to during a certain time period, at the expense of allowing the other to get away with more of their scheme.

It's such a generally helpful tool I've used it in basically every longform game I've run.

[cerinslair]

Zine Anniversary Sale

Heart Heist: The Zine turns 1 this Halloween 🥳🎃

To celebrate both, the zine will be 40% off for all of October 2024!

Your partners in crime are also your rivals in romance in this easy to learn, one-shot focused TTRPG. Carefully balance cooperation for successful heist against competing to win the heart of your monster patron. Intrigue, espionage, betrayal - anything to win your patron's affections, as long as you don't let them down by failing the heist!

The zine has everything you need to get started, including a ready-to-play example heist. Get it now for just $3 USD! Work on the full version of Heart Heist is still ongoing. If you get the game, please consider leaving feedback at the link provided at the end of the zine and leave a review on itch!

A sale by Cerin's Lair, 40% off Heart Heist: The Zine

[cerinslair]

Heart Heist's Inspirations

The following is a (not at all complete) list of media that inspired my debut TTRPG: Heart Heist - a game about a crew of sexy thieves collaborating on a heist while competing to date their beloved monster patron. The zine edition of Heart Heist is available now, with a full release in development!

Some of these were inspirational to me in the traditional sense, while others were more in the "do the opposite" sense. And some were somewhere in-between. I'm sure I'll add more to this list as I remember more.

TTRPGs

Honey Heist / Lasers & Feelings

Monster Hearts / PbtA

Dungeons & Dragons [vague disgruntled edition noises]

Films / Shows

Baby Driver

Die Hard

Heat (1995)

Heist (2001)

Lupin the Third (various)

Mission Impossible I - IV

National Treasure

She Ra and the Princesses of Power

Shrek

The Bad Guys

Video Games

Hitman

Mario Party

Monster Prom

Other

My partner, @lunchboxart. Resident monsterfucker consultant. Their love for this game makes it all worth it.

Brandon Sanderson's BYU lecture on the heist plot archetype

Many games of Werewolf/Mafia played as a child

Hours of research into various real-world heists

Stuff on my "To-Watch/Read" List

Before you say "how could you make a game about heists without watching/reading [X]!" There's so much stuff in the world to enjoy and I've yet to find time to enjoy it all!!

Blades in the Dark

Leverage

More Lupin the Third

The other Mission Impossibles

Ocean's 11

[cerinslair]

If I see one more bad TTRPG take that boils down to "the game system you use actually doesn't matter at all," I am going to become some sort of creature.

"The ingredients of the food don't matter as long as you're having fun!" You would serve your friend w/ a nut allergy peanuts then blame them for ruining the vibes at dinner. Or eat actual garbage just bc ur friends are doing it. Or not serve anything at all & wonder why folks left ur freefom RP hungry.

Or invite ur friends over for tea & biscuits only to serve beer & nachos instead. Beer & nachos can also be a good time, but you'd be crazy to try & convince someone those are the same thing! Your friends showed up overdressed w/ finger sandwhiches & are getting cheese dip on their nice clothes!

Imagine saying "I love cake but wish it wasn't so crumbly. I always make it with extra salt + cheese spread instead of icing bc I prefer that over something sweet. I wish it was easier to eat on-the-go. Also I'm allergic to eggs." ...then getting angry when someone suggests trying a pretzle with cheese dip.

Game design MATTERS! Games have mechanics that allow them to deliver on their premise! Games are designed around an intended experience! Games have baked-in assumptions on how they will be played, often made explicit in the text! Not to restrict you, but to excite you about what that game offers!

[cerinslair]

d66 Ways to Explain This Player Character’s Brief Absence

Aw beans, one of your players couldn’t show up to tonight’s game. Here’s 36 ways to explain why their character is missing just for this session! Roll a d66 (rolling one d6 for the tens-digit and another d6 for the ones-digit) or choose an option that makes sense for your situation.

For brevity, “PC” will be used in place of the missing player character’s name.

11: PC had previously sworn an oath to a wizard they were indebted to, granting the wizard one-time power and authority to temporarily summon PC to them whenever they require their aid. The wizard is cashing in right now.

12: PC found a cursed scroll which temporarily turns them into an incorporeal spirit, forced to haunt the other player characters undetected until they learn some moral lesson the scroll wants them to learn.

13: A faerie spirit on a quest for revenge mistook PC for someone else and stole them away in the night. They’ll return PC once they realize their mistake.

14: The battle of two quarreling chronomancers blew through your location, and PC fell into a time-rift left in the wake of one of the wizard’s attacks, sending them into the (near) future.

15: Aliens abducted PC but will return them when they prove too difficult to contain/experiment on.

16: PC finds themself trapped in a time-loop, and eventually discovers that they only way to escape is to avoid contact with the other player characters for the duration of the loop.

21: PC overheard something the other player characters said about them out of context and misinterpreted it in a way that greatly upset them. They sneak away to abandon the group when no one is looking but return upon realizing it was all a misunderstanding.

22: PC has an important family (or other personal) matter to attend to that requires their swift response, as it involves legal recourse surrounding the disappearance of someone close to them. They will return once it is settled.

23: A scatter-brained wizard’s apprentice studying teleportation magic accidentally switches places with PC, teleporting them to their mentor’s tower an impossible distance away. The apprentice thinks they can figure out a way to swap back with PC if given some time on their own. They hope PC hides in their study until they do – their master tends to fireball intruders on-sight and ask questions later.

24: PC has been possessed by a ghost, who will return control of their body to them once they complete some task the ghost wasn’t able to finish before they died.

25: PC stepped away to refill their water, and got turned around on their way back. They wandered around lost a while, but will find their way to the other player characters eventually.

26: A faerie spirit decided they fancied PC and whisked them away to the faerie realm in an attempt to seduce them. They’ll return PC once they realize they aren’t their type.

31: An enterprising minor demon wants to strike a bargain with PC and teleports the two of them to the top of a tower in an attempt to show off. However, the demon’s pitch is not going well, especially when it’s revealed they lack the power to get them both back down again without resting a while first.

32: PC is called in for jury duty, and either has to serve their time or go to the local magistrate to appeal for a waiver.

33: PC ran into an old friend and went to catch up with them over some drinks. However, the two of them got held up by some of the friend’s newest adversaries.

34: PC is avoiding the other player characters while they prepare a surprise for one or all of them – a gift, or a party to commemorate a certain event like an anniversary or holiday.

35: PC is troubled by recent events – related to the group’s adventures, or external to them – and wants some time alone to clear their head.

36: PC has been haunted by dreams of a symbol in a dark room. They spot this symbol on a stray cat and can’t help but investigate. It seems to be leading them somewhere, but only if they follow it alone.

41: PC is visited by the restless spirit of a friend long gone. Their ghost wants to tell PC a secret – a secret that they must take to their own grave – and leads them away from the rest of the player characters.

42: PC has been struck by sudden inspiration for a work of art, and they simply must bring it into the world before the inspiration fades.

43: PC received an ominous warning from a fortune teller to stay away from [events of today’s session] and is keeping a safe distance just in case.

44: PC is having a crisis of faith in themselves after recent events and takes off on their own for a while until they reassure themselves of their skill. Training montage optional.

45: PC is sent a threatening message by one of their adversaries telling them that if they don’t leave the group, their allies will be made to suffer for it. They leave, believing it to be some heroic self-sacrifice. They return once they realize they are all stronger together, and only with each other’s help can they defeat the adversary’s threat.

46: PC tried to follow an “astral projecting for dummies” guide as a joke, but ended up separated from their body until they figured out how to stop.

51: PC ran afoul of a witch years ago, who tried to curse PC with eternal sleep. However, the witch got their arcane verb-tenses mixed up. So instead, PC was cursed to sleep through a specific date and time. That date is today.

52: PC is shown something that causes them to doubt if their cause is the right one, and leaves until they can find out the truth. They return when what they were shown is proven to be a fabrication by their adversary to mislead them.

53: PC leaves the group because they feel their contributions aren’t appreciated enough. They return after some self-reflection reveals they weren’t feeling unappreciated, they were feeling jealous.

54: PC is feeling extremely ill today. If your group has access to magical disease relief, specify that such relief will still take time to affect whatever sickness has befallen PC – it will just relieve some of the pain in the meantime. Until then, they require rest.

55: PC must take a day off for an important religious observance of their faith.

56: PC received a message from a character they flirted with in town, inviting PC to come visit them for some fun. They sure are taking their time coming back.

61: A minor celebrity from one of PC’s niche interests is going to be in town sort-of-but-not-really nearby, and PC just can’t miss this opportunity to meet them!

62: PC accidentally stumbled into the secret hidden lair of a C-list villain. It will take them a little bit of time to escape on their own.

63: PC saw a rare, elusive mystical beast, prized by many, such as a unicorn. They chased after this once-in-a-lifetime opportunity and will return very disappointed.

64: PC is in a sour mood after accidentally breaking a sentimental keepsake, and just wants to be alone for a while.

65: PC insulted a wizard, who responded by turning PC into a pile of rats. Rats, plural. We’ll have to collect all of them up before they can be changed back.

66: PC is just feeling soooooo eepy. Little nap.