hi I'm going thru the spoilers and about the one with lloyd crying and javier listening outside. about javier wanting lloyd to trust him, i was wonderin when did javier explicitly says he trusts lloyd? since from what I've read so far whenever lloyd says to javier to trust him, javier is always dubious of him and actually doesn't trust him and simply follows the order. Is that why lloyd cried alone since he still thinks javier doesn't really trust him?
oh! javier does tell lloyd that he trusts him! straight to his face! several times in fact!
they vary from degrees of explicitness but there is absolutely no doubt at all that javier trusts lloyd and lloyd knows he does. how deep he believes that trust runs is up to debate but he very much does know that javie trusts him.
there's that time lloyd tells javier he can stop time itself and javier just goes "okay" and goes back to his breakfast because. duh. if lloyd says he can stop time then obviously it must be true. the crazier the thing he says the mostly likely it is to be the truth.
which lloyd then uses against him to convince him to bet his life against a dragon
"This will not do" Javier's voice dripped with alarm.
"What won't?"
"You are making a bad decision here. It's not too late now. Prepare yourself, Master Lloyd."
"For what?" Meanwhile Lloyd's voice was cheery.
"To run away. I will by some time."
"You plan on fighting that dragon?"
"Yes."
"Tsk. Don't even try."
"But Master Lloyd. Now is your last change-"
"Do I look like I've gone mad?" said Lloyd.
"..."
"Answer me. Do I look like someone who's lost his mind?"
Javier was about to answer yes when Lloyd's spoke first. "Who was it that said he would trust in my seemingly deranged behavior?"
"..."
"You said that," reminded Lloyd. "Those were your words. It goes the same right now. Do I look like I've lost it? In that case, trust me."
"But Master Lloyd-"
"I'm doing this for a reason." Lloyd didn't let Javier finish. "I've got a plan. So, do what you have to when I fail. Got it?"
"..."
or that time they go to seoul and lloyd tells him to just trust in his hyung and follow his lead. to which, once again, javier just goes "okay" because. well of course he does.
“When you’re in a foreign land such as this place, all you’ve got to do is just trust this big brother of yours and follow my lead. Okay?”
“I understand…”
“Eh?” Lloyd tilted his brow. “It’s rare of you to accept my words so easily.”
“Am I not allowed to?”
“No. You can’t. It’s strange. I have the chills right now.”
“…”
“You. Who are you?” asked Lloyd in astonishment. “The Javier I know is far from being a docile, humble or loyal fellow. He’s even farther away from being someone who would just not at my words without snapping back.”
“…”
“You better tell me honestly. Where did you hide my dear Javier?”
“Haah… Seriously…” Javier broke into laughter. “Who else could possess such a dashing appearance but me? […]”
or later on when javier straight up tells lloyd to get used to him just going along with what he says without protest because that's just how things are now. he does tease him that it's so lloyd lowers his guard and javier can stab him in the back but like. that's their love language <3
but yeah! lloyd absolutely does know that javier trusts him! javier has told him so himself! that he's a dummy who doesn't realize just how absolute that trust is it's a completely different matter lol
and as for the context of the scene you mention. here's a post i made a while ago about it but lemme summarize it.
first of all i need to show this set of illustrations because they make me sick in the head
the reason lloyd is crying is because it's finally crashing on him just how hopeless his situation truly is. how much he stands to lose if he doesn't pull off a miracle. how much pressure he's been under for so long and how close he is to breaking down.
and javier is listening through the door because he can tell there's something weighting down on lloyd but he can't confront him because lloyd isn't trusting him with his worries and he doesn't know how to make him.
javier wants so bad to let lloyd know that he doesn't have to worrym he doesn't have to be afraid, because javier is there for him. whatever comes next, whatever danger there is, javier will face it to protect lloyd. and if anyone needs to die then it's okay, because javier will die for him. so lloyd doesn't have to be afraid of something as stupid as him dying because javier simply won't allow it.
but he can't. because lloyd doesn't want to share his burdens. he doesn't want to let them drag anyone down with him. he thinks it's his fault everything that's threatening them is his fault and so he needs to handle everything on his own.
which is silly because javier is right there trying to coax the truth out of him and get him to share his burden with him and just!!! support him every way he can!! but lloyd is a very silly guy who thinks he doesn't deserve that :(
so no! it's not that lloyd thinks javier doesn't trust him! rather it's lloyd not wanting to trust javier with his worries, not out of distrust or anything like that, but out of a misplaced sense of responsibility that makes him want to carry everything by himself.
it's a very poignant scene i can't wait to get the translation for it!
