trust fall (into your arms) | part 2
pairing: bang chan x female reader
summary: you've never been the jealous type, but when you notice a makeup artist's strange behaviour around chan, you just can't let it go.
word count: 8.6k
tags/warnings: angst, arguments, miscommunication, reader is a producer at jype, jealousy, implied infidelity, happy ending
a/n: thank you everyone for patiently waiting for pt 2!! i hope you like it 🥹 sorry in advance if there are any mistakes/typos, i have been sick and kind of rushed finishing this so i didn't proofread it 😅 also yes i drafted this fic so long ago that channie's room was still a thing back then loooool
read it on ao3 | part 1 | masterlist
The day starts off pretty normal.
There’s dance practice in the morning that ends up extending until early afternoon, a quick lunch, then Chan’s off to a solo schedule. Even after he’s done a few of them, he’s still getting used to how quiet and lonely it feels without having other members with him. Individual schedules usually finish faster than group ones and Chan’s glad when things wrap up earlier than expected - there’s nothing he wants more than to spend the rest of the night with you.
When Chan finishes getting changed and cleaning off his makeup, a manager approaches him.
“Chan-ssi, I just spoke to your driver and he’s going to be a bit delayed. There’s a bad accident on the highway here and he’s stuck in the traffic,” the manager says.
“Ah, how long will it be?” Chan asks, bracing himself.
“Not too long, maybe 30 minutes from now. But if you want, then you can come with one of us, we’re all heading back into the city.”
“It’s fine,” Chan says quickly. “If the driver’s already on his way here, then I can wait a little bit.”
The location of the shoot is on the outskirts of Seoul and even without the traffic, it had taken over an hour to make it earlier in the day. Chan doesn’t want to waste the driver’s time and inconvenience the staff just because he wants to get home a little bit faster.
“If you’re sure,” the manager confirms.
“Yeah, as long as I can stay here, I have my laptop so I can just work on something until the driver arrives.”
“Great,” the manager says, sounding relieved. “Really sorry that you will have to wait, but thank you for your patience.”
“It’s no problem,” Chan promises.
As the rest of the staff continue to clean up, Chan keeps himself busy by pulling up the latest song that he’s been working on. Luckily there’s a small table near the entrance of the building so that he’ll be able to see when the driver arrives.
Since the schedule was just a photoshoot, things are cleaned up pretty quickly and it’s not long until the building is quiet except for the sound of Chan’s fingers against his keyboard.
That is, until he hears footsteps coming from the second floor. He’s not worried, the building is small enough that there’s only one staircase up which means it can’t be a sasaeng, just surprised that there’s someone else still around.
He goes back to work, content to just let the staff leave without a conversation, but gets interrupted when that person suddenly calls out.
“Oh! Chan-ssi! I didn’t know you’d still be here.”
There’s no mistaking the high pitched tone of Harang’s voice. Chan tries (and fails) to not roll his eyes at the fake surprise that colours her voice and continues staring at his laptop. He’s wearing headphones, so he can pretend that he just didn’t hear her.
Honestly, Chan has never really cared for Harang. There’s no denying that she’s a talented makeup artist, the only reason that he puts up with her, but her entitled attitude and blatant flirting make her annoying to deal with. It’s not enough that he can make a formal complaint, he knows she’d be the type to go straight to the tabloids if he did, but after your comment about her behaviour, he’s let management know that he’d prefer if Harang was not one of the artists assigned to the group. Today, it turned out that she was the only makeup artist available for this last minute shoot.
He winces just thinking about you. He knows that he didn’t handle the conversations that you’ve had with Harang well but it hurt his pride and he couldn’t help but turn defensive at the idea that he would even be tempted to cheat on you, much less with someone like Harang.
Chan watches out of the corner of his eye as Harang descends the stairs. He’s hoping that she gets the hint and just leaves immediately, even though he knows the chance of him winning the lottery would be higher. From where he’s sitting, he can see that Harang is carrying a huge case of what is probably makeup and if it were anyone else, he would have jumped up to help them already.
And maybe he should have, because at that moment, Harang disappears from Chan’s sight in a flurry of movement, followed by a loud crash and scream.
Chan abandons his ruse and rushes over to find Harang lying at the base of the stairs, clutching one of her legs and crying hysterically.
“Are you okay? What happened?” Chan asks frantically.
“It hurts,” Harang gasps. “It hurts so much.”
“Where does it hurt? Should we call an ambulance?”
“My ankle.” Harang is crying so hard that Chan can barely understand what she says.
“Okay, just- let's take a deep breath, can you do that for me? In and out, nice and slow.”
It takes a bit of coaching, but Chan manages to calm Harang down slightly. Tears continue to roll down her cheeks, but she’s no longer inconsolable.
“Do I need to call an ambulance?” Chan asks a second time.
“No,” Harang says in between deep, shuddering breaths. “I- it hurts a lot, but if I can find someone to drive me to the hospital then it should be fine…”
“You don’t have a ride?” he asks even though he already knows the answer.
“No,” Harang pouts. “I was planning to take a bus or taxi home, but now I don’t know if I can.”
“I’ll call a manager,” Chan says. “They might not be that far away.”
“It’s fine, you don’t-” Harang starts to say, but Chan’s already dialling.
“Hey, how far away are you?” he asks when the call connects through.
“Is something wrong?” the manager asks, sounding alarmed. “Do you need us to come back? Let me see, with the traffic, we can be back- oh it’s going to be at least 50 minutes. Did something happen with your driver? I thought he should be showing up soon-”
“I’m fine,” Chan says, before the manager spirals even more. “One of the makeup artists is here, but she hurt herself. It’s not serious, but she needs a ride to the hospital.”
“I don’t think we can turn back now, Chan-ssi,” the manager says, sounding apologetic, but no longer ready to drop everything now that it’s not directly involving Chan. “Get her to call the lead stylist and see if there’s something they can do for her, but this isn’t something that you have to worry about. If it’s bad, call an ambulance, otherwise she can just get a taxi.”
“Right, thanks.” Is all that Chan is able to say before the call ends.
“They can’t come, right?” Harang guesses when Chan lowers his phone.
“No,” he admits. “Can you call your supervisor? They might be able to come around and pick you up.”
Harang begrudgingly calls, but it's not long until she confirms that the rest of her team isn't willing or able to pick her up.
Chan hovers around her, not wanting to touch her, but concerned that her ankle could be broken. Luckily, at that moment he notices a flash of movement outside.
“That’s my driver, let me go talk to him quickly so he can help,” he says, before leaving behind a sniffling Harang.
Chan quickly explains the situation to the driver and asks him to go take a look at Harang, before walking to the nearest convenience store. He buys a couple cups of ice, then heads back.
When he returns, the driver has taken off Harang's shoe and is propping her leg up so that her ankle is elevated. It hasn't been long, but it already looks swollen and red.
Chan and the driver decide to take Harang to the hospital themselves, there's one not too far away and although he's wary of spending time alone with Harang after you expressed your concerns about her, he doesn’t know what else to do. If she is actually seriously injured then he would feel so guilty about not helping, especially since there’s nobody else around.
He'd prefer to keep his distance from Harang, but still helps to bring her to the car. The driver initially tried to hoist her up, but she had crumpled like a tissue the second that her bad leg had touched the floor, bringing the driver down with her.
They lead her to the backseat of the car and make sure she's settled, then Chan moves to sit shotgun. As they drive over, Chan pulls out his phone and shoots you a quick text that he has to work late. He keeps things vague and avoids all mention of Harang, not wanting you to worry.
They don't have to wait too long at the hospital, in fact there's only a couple people in line ahead of them. It's good news, the faster the better, but Chan was selfishly hoping that the expected wait time would be long enough that he could excuse himself and ask to be driven home first.
Once Harang is finished and has the good news that her ankle is just twisted and not sprained or broken, it's surprisingly late. The sun has set and Chan is starving. He hasn't eaten since lunchtime and he knows both Harang and his driver have been out way longer than they were expecting to, not even counting the hour-long drive back into the city.
When he brings up going to a restaurant to have a quick dinner, both the others agree immediately and the three of them settle on a place that's not too far from the hospital. The meal is a little bit awkward, but everyone eats fast enough that it's over fast enough.
Chan ends up asking to be dropped off at the company. It’s late and there’s still something he’s hoping to get finished before the schedule the next morning. After working until everything on his screen starts to blur together, he crashes on the couch for a couple hours of sleep.
The alarm that he set jolts him awake the next morning and he grabs a bag of toiletries that he keeps in his studio for nights like these to freshen up. He knows they’re going to do hair and makeup so there’s not much to do other than brush his teeth and wash his face.
When Chan slumps into one of the company rooms that have been reserved and drops off his bag on the side, it’s still early enough that he's beaten the rest of the members here. He pulls out his laptop and resumes his work until the door opens.
A sharp wolf-whistle pierces through the air when Jisung spots him and Changbin sits beside him and slings a heavy arm around his shoulders.
“Hyung!! You look like you didn’t sleep at all! Did Y/n keep you up late last night?” Changbin asks suggestively.
Chan stares at him blankly.
“What are you talking about?”
“Don’t try to play dumb. Come on! You can tell us allll the details,” Jisung chimes in.
“No, we do NOT want details!” Seungmin yells from the side. When Chan looks over, the rest of the boys are split between trying to hold back their laughter or looking vaguely ill at the idea.
“No, seriously. What are you guys talking about?” Chan asks, starting to get irritated by being left out of whatever they seem to be referencing. “I was here last night. Finishing up a bit of work."
The smiles fade from the members faces as realisation that Chan isn’t just joking with them starts to hit.
“What do you mean, hyung?” Changbin asks.
“What do you mean, what do I mean? I was at my studio, why’s that such a surprise?” Chan says, dread starting to creep into his stomach.
“Did you talk to Y/n yesterday?” Felix asks hesitantly.
“Kind of, I texted her that I’d be working late.”
“And she didn’t say anything?”
“She was fine with it. Why? What-” Chan freezes.
No. There’s no way that Chan forgot.
He’d spent days planning an evening out for you, pulling strings to get a private booth at a fancy restaurant you had mentioned wanting to try, ordering flowers to give to you, and picking out a bracelet that he thought you would like.
He had wanted to make up for how busy he’d been lately and make sure that you felt cherished.
“I have to- I gotta go talk to her,” Chan says, heading to the door.
“Hyung, we have a schedule-”
“I’ll be quick, I promise,” Chan says. “I just- I have to explain.”
Chan runs.
When he finally makes it to your studio and knocks, it takes a moment before you open the door. Your face settles into an unusual, flat expression the second you see Chan.
“Y/n,” Chan says immediately, trying to hide the fact that he's panting slightly. “I'm so so sorry about yesterday-”
“Now is not a good time,” you interrupt. “Sorry, let’s talk later.”
“I promise, I’ll be quick, I just want to explain-”
“Oppa, I’m working right now-”
“Y/nnie, is everything okay?” a voice from inside your studio calls out.
“Everything is fine, Yeji-yah,” you turn back to reply. The door swings open a bit wider as you do so, allowing Chan to see that all of Itzy is crowded in the small room.
“Oh, hi,” Chan says. The girls all greet him back, looking interested in his sudden appearance. He can tell by the way that his ears and neck are burning that they must be flushed red from the idea of being overheard. “Sorry for interrupting, I- I’ll talk to you later, okay Y/n-ah? Let me know when you’re done and I’ll come by. Please.”
“I’ll try,” you say unconvincingly. “Today’s a bit busy.”
“Tonight? Tomorrow? Just- even if it’s for a few minutes.”
“I’ll let you know.” Chan knows by the tone of your voice that you’re setting a boundary. If he keeps pushing, it’ll just be pushing you further away from him, the opposite of what he wants to achieve.
“Okay,” he says, backing off. “Okay, I’ll talk to you later, okay?”
“Okay.”
“I love you,” Chan says, leaning in so that he won’t be overheard. “And I’m sorry.”
“I have to go,” you say looking away. “Sorry.”
The cold shoulder, how uncomfortable you look, it’s what he deserves, Chan thinks. He knows that you’re upset that he forgot about your date, he would have been too if the roles were reversed. A small pit, roiling with guilt, forms in his stomach.
—
Thankfully, you don’t make Chan wait too long. The next evening, when Chan is shoulders deep into reviewing edits for a song that they want to use on the next comeback, there’s a slight knock on the door before you let yourself in.
“Hey,” you say quietly from the doorway. Even though you only said one word, there's something in the tone of your voice that causes alarm bells to ring in Chan's head.
“Hey,” Chan echoes back cautiously.
Chan opens his mouth to explain everything - how his driver was late, Harang injuring herself, having to take her to the doctor, spending the night at the company - but you speak first.
“I was just thinking… I think that maybe we should take a break,” you say in a wavering voice.
“A break?” Chan repeats in disbelief. He doesn’t know where this is coming from.
Yes, he feels absolutely terrible that he forgot your date, but it doesn’t seem like cause for this kind of reaction. In the past, you’ve always been the one who was less enthusiastic about going out on actual dates, always insisting that you didn’t care much about doing anything special.
He also knows that he didn’t handle the whole Harang thing well. You were right to bring up her attitude to him and he should have done a better job in validating your concerns. Instead, he had hurried to try and reassure you that he really didn’t care about her, but it seemed to have backfired. Even worse, his stupid pride had gotten him annoyed when you didn’t believe that there was nothing going on between him and Harang.
But surely that was something they could just talk out, wasn’t it?
“Just some time off. It’ll be good for us,” you continue. “You've been busy lately and I've been busy too, so it's good timing.”
“But… why?”
“I don’t want to be a bother or a… distraction for you at work.”
“You’re not!”
“Just the other day, you left right before a schedule to come talk to me. How is that not being a distraction? It’s not fair to you or to the rest of the members.”
“That was my choice, it was fine! It wasn’t your fault at all, that was all me.”
“And it was a little awkward that you interrupted me when I was working. I didn't know how to explain it to the girls, I hate lying to them.”
“That was- I'm sorry, that was also on me. I'll be more careful next time, I won't drop by without notice,” Chan promises.
“I just think we need some space.”
“Do you really want this?” he asks in a low voice.
“I want you to be happy.” You give him a watery smile. “And it’s okay if I’m not the one that can make you happy.”
“But- Woah wait, where’s this coming from? What are you talking about? Y/n, you’re the one that makes me happy, it’s always been you. Is this still about the date? I said I was sorry, I promise I really had things planned out and I’ll make it up to you-”
“Chan, it’s not about the date. You know me, I don’t need much. I don’t care about going to fancy restaurants or if you buy me expensive gifts-”
“Then what? I don't get it, I know that I’ve been busy, but I’m trying-” Chan pleads.
“I just need to know that I’m with someone who actually wants to be with me,” you say firmly. As if that explains everything.
“I do! What do you mean? Of course I want to be with you-”
“I know you were out with Harang,” you say. “That night that you cancelled our date.”
“What?” Chan’s mind races, trying put together the pieces of why you think it's such a big deal or how you even know it happened in the first place. “How did you find out about that?”
Which is clearly the wrong thing to say based on the way that your face falls.
“So it's true? You were out with her that night?” you ask in a voice that's all hollowed out. You turn away from him slightly. “I was hoping-”
“No, I can explain that, really! It wasn’t what it looked like, I can explain-”
Chan reaches out to take hold of your hand, but you just shake him off.
“I just need some time. To think about everything,” you say. “I'll see you around, okay?”
You lean forward, cup Chan’s cheek with your hand and place a gentle kiss onto his forehead. Before Chan can say another word, you’ve pulled away and are out the door.
—
Things don't get better after that. Chan gives you space and time like you've asked, but it feels like there's a gaping hole in his life that can only be filled by you.
It’s been a while since Chan has been in such a dark mood and at first, the rest of the members tiptoe around him, not wanting to set off his temper. They know that Chan just gets like that sometimes, whether it's homesickness, burnout, pressure from the company, or a combination of things, they all understand and know that he wants to work it out on his own. But after a few days of brooding, they start to ask questions, pushing a little to try and get Chan to open up more.
Chan doesn’t tell them anything. Even thinking about you is painful enough, he doesn’t want to talk about it with anybody else. Instead, he tries to take all those emotions and memories and lock them up for later. He spends all his time in the studio, either staring dully at his laptop or making garbage tracks that he knows are unusable.
It only takes four days before Changbin gets fed up with Chan.
The tipping point is when Chan, in a brilliant stroke of stupidity, accidentally deletes the demo that they just spent two hours making and they aren’t able to recover it. Changbin calls IT, asks them if they can find the lost file somewhere in the server, then bullies Chan into going back to Changbin’s dorm with him under the pretense that they're going to eat dinner even though both of them know it's not true. Chan has known Changbin long enough to know an intervention when he sees it.
“So? What’s going on?” Changbin asks once the two of them have sat down in Changbin's living room.
“Would you believe me if I said nothing?” Chan tries, already knowing that Changbin isn't going to let him off this easily.
“Hyung,” Changbin says flatly.
“Okay, sure, I’ve been a little down lately-”
“You snapped at Innie the other day,” Changbin says, holding up his index finger. “Even though he was just checking up on you since you stayed late at the company the night before.”
Chan winces at that memory. He had apologised later, but he could tell that it had shaken Jeongin in the moment.
“Okay, that was pretty bad-” Chan starts to say.
“Felix said that the two of you had an argument recently,” Changbin continues, lifting another finger. “Because he drank your water? When has sharing water ever been something you ever cared about?”
“It wasn’t about the water-”
“Today, you completely disregarded Jisung’s suggestion when we were reviewing lyrics, I think he was right by the way,” Changbin steamrolls ahead while raising a third finger. “You’ve been spending crazy hours in the studio, but it’s not even because we have a deadline soon and I know you haven't actually been making any new tracks so clearly your studio time hasn't been very productive. Oh, and I saw that you’ve only been listening to your ‘sad love songs to make you cry when you're feeling lonely’ playlist lately when I borrowed your laptop for a second earlier.”
“Okay! Okay, I get it,” Chan admits. “I’ve been miserable and taking it out on everybody else. I’m sorry. I’ll- I’ll talk to Jeongin and Felix and Jisung and everyone and apologise. I'll do better.”
“Chan-hyung.” Changbin’s voice softens and he takes Chan’s hands in his own. “We’re concerned about you. That’s all. We're not mad.”
“Thanks,” Chan says, even though he knows he doesn't deserve such easy forgiveness. “I really am sorry. It's just been- it's been tough.”
“Don’t go isolating yourself. Don't do this on your own. Whatever ‘this’ is. Let us in. Or if you don’t want to talk to us, talk to Y/n-ah about it.”
“I-” Chan looks away. The ever-present knot in his chest twinges painfully hearing your name. “I haven’t seen- We’re not talking right now.”
“You guys broke up?” Hyunjin asks in disbelief, popping his head out from where he must have been listening in from his room. Chan hadn’t even realised that Hyunjin was home.
“No! We didn’t break up! We’re just… On a break,” Chan says lamely, knowing how dumb it sounds.
“Hyung-” Changbin says with a voice filled with pity.
“I know.” Chan buries his head in his hands. “But it’s just temporary. She just- we just need some time.”
“So that's been-”
“Yeah,” Chan groans. “Now you know. That's why I've been all…”
“Miserable? Irritable? Depressed? Short-tempered?” Hyunjin suggests unhelpfully. He's given up pretending that he doesn't want to be part of the conversation and has joined Chan and Changbin on the couch.
“I was going to say moody, but yeah I guess all of the above,” Chan concedes. “I’m sorry.”
“Do you want to talk about it?” Changbin offers kindly.
“Not really,” Chan says truthfully. “But I probably should.”
“We're not going to judge you, we're just here to listen to what you have to say, and if you want, we can give advice,” Changbin says.
“Speak for yourself, I'm just going to say what's on my mind, because I know that Channie-hyung can take it,” Hyunjin chimes in. “If this is a scenario like one of his trash songs-”
“Hyunjin-ah,” Changbin scolds lightly. “Just let him talk.”
Hyunjin grumbles a little bit, but settles down.
Chan wants to start from the beginning, but realises that he's not exactly sure how this all originated, so he summarizes his last conversation with you and traces his way back. Along the way, Changbin and Hyunjin ask a few questions and it ends up taking almost half an hour to explain everything. Even though they don't say anything, Chan can tell that whatever it is that they were expecting, it was not this.
“Hyung,” Hyunjin says after a moment of silence once Chan is finished. “With all due respect, are you stupid?”
“Hyunjin!” Changbin reaches over to smack Hyunjin on the arm, ignoring when he clutches his arm.
“I- I guess?” Chan says helplessly. “Is it that obvious to you what went wrong? I just feel like it's so messy and-”
“Yeah, of course it's messy! You made it messy! You said you don't know what you should do, well I'm about to go and beat up Harang myself! You're going to let her get away with ruining your relationship?!?” Hyunjin asks, aghast. “Does Y/n mean nothing to you? You’re not going to fight for her?”
“No- just- I didn’t want to push her,” Chan stammers.
“Did you even look up Harang’s Instagram?” Hyunjin asks. “Did you tell Harang to stop? Did you talk to management about the fact that she might be breaching the NDA in her contract? Because it sounds to me like Y/n was justifiably angry with you and if I were her, I would have done a lot worse than ask for a break.”
“I meant to look it up, but just never got around to it. And I did tell management that I didn't want to work with Harang anymore, I never told Y/n about it though, I didn't want her to worry about it and plus, Harang never actually did anything-”
“It's not about the fact that she never did anything that crossed a boundary with you! Which she probably did if we can believe what Y/n said about those pictures, which I do believe. The problem is that you didn't take Y/n seriously enough to even see if what she told you was true!”
“Is it really that bad?” Chan asks sheepishly. “It's not that I didn't want to believe her but-”
“Are you listening to yourself?!” Hyunjin asks.
Chan glances over to check Changbin's reaction to all of this, but he just shrugs helplessly.
“I hate to say it, but he's right,” Changbin says, nodding in Hyunjin's direction. “It sounds like Y/n is more likely just hurt that you didn't take her seriously when she brought up legitimate concerns. And if you think about it from her perspective, it really does seem like you ditched your date to hang out with Harang, even if we know that's not what actually happened.”
Chan buries his head in his hands and groans.
“I really did everything wrong, didn't I,” he says into his hands.
“It's-” Changbin sighs, clearly trying to find the right way to word his thoughts. “It's a complicated situation, but what matters most is-”
“Hyung,” Hyunjin interrupts in a strangled voice. Chan and Changbin instantly turn to where he's staring at his phone, face drained of all colour. “Hyung, you have to see these.”
They flip through the pictures that Hyunjin has found in silence. Each one that they see makes it disturbingly obvious that you were correct and Harang has been posting pictures with and of Chan. The only good thing, if you can even call it that, is that all the pictures seem to have been taken at the company or schedule that she was working at. It's just a small relief that she hasn't gone so far as to stalk him in his personal life.
Still, Chan doesn't remember a single of these pictures being taken - he surely would have called her out if he had - but in some of them it even looks like he's deliberately posing with Harang. He's not sure if they've been edited, modified with AI, or if Harang has just been extremely strategic in her photography. Either way, the pictures look incredibly realistic.
Chan feels sick.
He can't imagine just how terrible it must have been for you to see these, to have had Harang taunt you with these posts. How heart-breaking it must have been when he had assumed that Harang wouldn't dare risk her career just for some internet fame.
Honestly, it's amazing that you even bothered to speak to him at all after seeing the last photos that Harang posted.
Changbin and Hyunjin don't say anything when they see the story highlight, the one from that night. They don't have to because they're all thinking the same thing.
It's now incredibly obvious why you're avoiding Chan, why you've asked for this break.
You think that Chan cheated on you.
—
It almost kills Chan to have to wait until the next morning to have to head to the company. There's nothing he wants more than to just go straight to you and beg you to forgive him, but there's something he has to do before that.
Chan's not sure what Harang's schedule is, but he just heads up to the floor where all the stylists and makeup artists work, hoping that she'll be there. By some stroke of luck, he hears her voice coming through the open door of one of the rooms. Hearing his name, he waits outside, curious what she's saying when she doesn't know he's listening.
“It’s okay, I can tell that they’re going to break up soon anyway,” Harang says in that obnoxious, arrogant tone that she always has. “We’re going to be such a power couple, Y/n is way too plain for him.”
Chan freezes in place. He agreed with your suspicions that Harang liked him, but he didn’t think that she was actually delusional enough to believe that he would choose her over you.
“Don’t you think it would have been a good idea to wait-” At least whoever Harang is talking to sounds more reasonable, but Harang doesn't seem to care to hear them out.
“Listen,” Harang says impatiently. “Chan’s an adult and can do whatever he wants. If he chooses to spend his time with me instead of her, he’s allowed to do that. I can’t force him to spend time with her, it’s obvious that he’s just in that relationship because he feels bad for her or it’s convenient or something.”
“Really? I thought-”
“Oh come on, if he really liked her then he wouldn’t try so hard to hide their relationship. And she’s so desperate to stay with him, can you believe she actually approached me and asked me to take down some of my Instagram posts? She spouted all this garbage about professionalism and company policy, but I know that she’s just jealous because he probably doesn’t let her post anything with him in it. I mean, how insecure do you have to be to try to control the pictures that your boyfriend is in? It’s like she doesn’t know he’s a celebrity. I really don’t understand what he sees in her.”
Chan sees red.
He bursts into the room, uncaring of who else might be around to see it.
“How dare you!” Chan says, so angry that he’s almost at a loss for words.
Harang stares at him in shock before she remembers to pretend to be innocent.
“Chan-ssi, what- what are you doing here?” she stammers.
“Don't play stupid, I could hear you from down the hall. Did you really think that the company or I wouldn't find out? That you'd be able to get away with it?”
“Huh?” She blinks up at Chan with huge, confused eyes. “What do you mean? What are you talking about?”
“You know exactly what I'm talking about. The pictures, the comments, really, I tried to give you the benefit of the doubt but after you posted so many? Did you stage the fall too?” Chan demands, looking at the way that Harang seems to be standing without favouring any of her ankles.
Harang immediately bursts into tears. Chan can see now that it's the exact same over-the-top reaction as when she had fallen down the stairs.
“I’m sorry! Please don’t be mad,” she cries. “It was just for fun and I didn’t think that anybody would notice. I just posted the first picture and didn’t even know you were in the background and when someone commented on it, I didn’t know what to say! My boyfriend had just broken up with me and- and- I’m really really sorry!”
Chan pinches the bridge of his nose at her reaction and sucks in a deep breath to try and control his emotions. He’s not fooled by her pathetic attempts to gain sympathy and the fact that she’s trying to play innocent is just annoying him even more. Still, regardless of the reasoning behind it, he doesn’t want to be the type of person to yell at a crying girl.
“Just, delete them. And post something to clarify that you’re not actually dating me or anybody at that,” he says stiffly.
“What?” she sniffs, peering up at him with wide teary eyes. “I can reply to the comments and say that we’re not together, but do I have to get rid of them? They’re nice pictures! And they don’t really show any of your features, nobody can confirm that it’s you, it’s all rumours.”
Chan drops the politeness from his voice. He doesn’t have it in him to pretend to care about her feelings anymore and her whining voice is irritating him.
“Harang. You can delete the photos now or I can call Dohyun and you can explain the situation to him.” All the blood instantly drains from her face at the mention of her manager. Chan has already booked a meeting with the company this afternoon, he has no intention of keeping management unaware of what Harang has done, but she doesn’t have to know that.
“No, no! I can- I can delete them,” she says, pulling out her phone and unlocking it with shaky fingers. When she opens up her profile and hesitates to click on a photo, Chan reaches and plucks the phone from her hands.
He systematically deletes each picture that he’s in before moving on to her gallery. He’s prepared a little thumb drive that he connects to Harang’s phone and transfers over any pictures that he’s in, disinterested in the hiccuping noises that Harang makes beside him. It’s alarming, the number of times she's managed to capture him unaware, way more than what she's posted.
When Chan gives Harang her phone back and she finally leaves the room, Chan immediately calls her manager and explains the situation. It’s not just the fact that she’s interfering with his personal life. Having photos of him, of any of the idols, and posting them on social media is strictly against whatever contract she must have with JYPE and her lack of remorse just makes her a liability.
Chan spends the rest of the morning with JYPE's legal team. What Harang did is not just a contract violation since it directly affected Chan. He's not sure how exactly they're going to press charges, but he follows along with whatever the lawyers recommend, dutifully signing all the paperwork to make sure that Harang will be properly prosecuted and punished.
That afternoon, he texts you for the first time since your fight.
[Sent - 2:07 pm]
Hey
Can we talk?
I understand if you don't want to
I didn't know about the pictures
I'm sorry, I should have taken you seriously when you brought it up
But it's all gone now. Everything.
I talked to management too
They terminated her contract and we're pursuing legal action - both the company and I
I'm not sure how the lawsuits are going to work out, but I promise I won't let this slide
I'm just really sorry
And he waits. You're a better person than he is because he's shocked when his phone vibrates only a few hours later.
[Received - 5:24 pm]
You can come by my studio tomorrow at 2pm
There's nothing else, no mention of how you're doing, what you think of everything, but it's more than Chan deserves and way more generous than he expected.
Chan's nervous for the rest of the day and the whole morning of the day after. He knows that this is his only chance to win you back and he's determined to prove how much you mean to him. He gets scolded continuously for not paying attention during dance practice, but all the members know by now what's going on and go easy on him.
The time passes both too slowly and too quickly, before he knows it, Chan's standing in front of your studio door. His hand is shaking as he lifts it to knock.
When you open the door, Chan feels his heart drop at your appearance. It's been a week since he's seen you, the longest the two of you have gone outside of when he's been away on tour. It's obvious that you haven't been doing well, you're well put together, but you've lost weight and your eyes have lost their spark.
You look fragile.
And Chan knows he's the reason.
“Hi,” he says quietly, offering you a small smile and the package that he's prepared. It's small, but heartfelt, filled with all your favourite things and the bracelet that he was supposed to give you, all those days ago.
“Hi,” you reply in a careful voice. You take the gift, open the door a little wider, but don't return the smile. “Come in.”
Chan watches as you make your way over to your desk and sit in your chair instead of the couch that you usually prefer. Not knowing how long you want him to stay, he lingers near the door.
“You can stop me at any time, but I really just wanted to say that I'm sorry,” Chan blurts out. “I'm so so sorry for what I did and I'm even more sorry for what I didn't do. I'm sorry that I didn't take your concerns seriously. I'm sorry that I neglected our relationship. I'm sorry that I didn't believe you, that I hurt you, that I broke your trust. I promise that I will do anything and everything to make things right again. If you let me, that is.”
Chan takes a deep breath and when he looks at you, you have your head tilted in consideration. You nod, encouraging Chan to continue. It's not much, but it's enough to give Chan the courage he needs to continue.
“I wanted to clarify that I never ever ever even thought about cheating on you. Nothing ever happened between Harang and I, and nothing ever will. She hurt herself and I was the only one that was still there, but all that happened was I got my driver to drive her to the hospital and the three of us ate dinner together because it was late and we were far from the city. I had completely forgotten about our date, which I'm so sorry about. I never- I couldn't have imagined that she could or would make it seem like I was choosing her over you. And I don't want to say it as an excuse, especially because you warned me, but I had no idea that she was so so delusional and that she was actually plotting against us. I should have been more careful, but I really didn't know-”
“I believe you,” you interrupt softly.
“I- what?” Chan asks, not sure if he can believe what he thought he heard you say.
“I said I believe you,” you repeat. “I- I won't lie, it really hurt, when I saw that post she made, the times that you defended her, forgetting about our date. And I think it's going to take a while to build back that trust, I still need some time. But-” You giggle and it's the most beautiful sound Chan has ever heard. “She's kind of insane, isn't she?”
“She's actually crazy! It was kind of scary” Chan admits lightly. “Finding out that she actually thought that her posts and the way that she was acting would get me to fall for her. I can't believe I ever thought that she was harmless.”
“I appreciate it,” you say. “That you didn't hesitate to do something when you finally found out. I feel a lot better knowing that she's not going to be working with you or any of the guys anymore.”
“I just wish that I had known earlier, I can't believe that I was so stupid to not listen to you or look into it,” Chan says. “And the company is doing further investigations, I think they're going to be a lot more strict with staff and their social media going forward.”
“That's good,” you hum.
“Is there anything else?” Chan asks hesitantly. “Anything else that's bothering you, that you think we should talk about?”
You press your lips together and look away.
“Hey, you can tell me anything, okay? I promise that I won't let you down again. If it's something that I can't do this very second, we can talk about it, work it out.”
“It's just hard, sometimes,” you start hesitantly. “And I understand, of course, don't get me wrong, I know why we have to but. I don't know, part of the reason I hated those Instagram posts so much was because I was jealous. I wanted to be the one posting pictures with you. I even would have settled with being able to publicly refute her claims of being your girlfriend.”
“Yeah, no, I get it,” Chan says. “I thought I'd be satisfied with just being with you, but it's really difficult, not being allowed to show you off. Having to do all the fanservice, I mean with the members it's whatever, but when it's with the fans? It just feels wrong.”
“And I know there's nothing that you can do. I know that we're keeping it a secret because it protects us, both of us, but-”
“It doesn't make it easier,” Chan finishes for you. “Even though we both agreed, even though it's for the better, it doesn't mean we have to like it.”
“So what do we do?”
“Would you actually want it? To go public?” Chan asks. “If you've thought about it and are serious about it… I'll talk to the company, see what I can do.”
“I've thought about it,” you say slowly. “Does the idea of having my identity revealed scare me? Yes and no offense, but your fans are crazy. But I think I still want it. For everyone to know about… us.”
Chan can't stop the smile that grows hearing you say that. Before today, he hadn't been sure if there'd still be an 'us' for people to know about.
“Okay, I'll talk to them,” Chan promises.
You open your mouth to say something, when an alarm on your phone goes off.
“I- I have a meeting soon,” you explain.
“I understand,” Chan says. “I won't keep you.”
“Thanks,” you nod.
“And- thank you,” Chan says as he leaves. “For giving me another chance.”
—
The next day, Chan talks to a manager about it. Then he talks to his manager's manager about it. Then he talks to his manager's manager's manager about it. Once he's talked to just about every manager within Division 1, he talks to JYP himself.
And they all say the same thing.
No.
Absolutely not.
It's too risky, it's not safe, it's not good for the group, it's not good for the next comeback, it's not good for their upcoming tour, there's nothing positive that can come from it.
Chan is forbidden from even thinking of giving the slightest hint to anybody at all that he's dating.
So Chan does what he always does in these situations. What he always encourages the boys to do when they're faced with this kind of dilemma.
He takes matters into his own hands.
—
Finally, it’s the weekend.
Chan skipped going live last week, he was not in good condition after his conversation with you and it would have been obvious, but this week he has a plan.
He logs on and greets everybody, apologising for the long time in between lives and explaining that he's been very busy with schedules and other things lately. He hadn’t realised it, but apparently fans had found out about the lawsuit against Harang and although details haven’t been released, they know that a staff member was involved. The chat is a flurry of questions and comments about it, but Chan makes sure to avoid the topic for now.
He spends a while just playing music and reading the chat. After a while, he spots an interesting comment that he decides to read out loud.
“I want to be in a relationship, but I’m scared that my parents won’t approve of the person that I like. What should I do?”
He leans back in his chair, propping his elbows on the armrests and steepling his fingers together.
“Now see, this is a tough situation. Like if you’re in a relationship with someone, then your friends and family should try to respect that relationship. Of course, there are times when once they get to know that person, they might have a legitimate concern about your physical or emotional safety, but that’s different. If your friends and family are judging your partner, just based on things like their appearance or other surface level things, then that's not fair."
It's not the first time that Chan has provided this kind of advice on stream, he knows he has to be careful about what he says because it's going to be captured and reposted everywhere.
"I think that respect is a basic thing that we should be providing to other people. I know it can be easy to think you know a lot about a person or about a relationship just from what you've seen, but at the end of the day, we should be able to trust that the two people in a relationship know what they're doing. Even if we think we're doing the right thing, it can get very messy very quickly.”
Chan stops for a moment to prepare himself for what he's about to say next.
“But Stays, you wouldn’t do that, right?” Chan leans forwards and stares directly into the camera for a long moment, before going back to look at the chat.
The comments are flying by, much faster than usual, and range from ‘yes, i hope my parents accept it when i introduce all of skz as my boyfriends’ to the more serious ‘Chan, why does it sound like you’re speaking from personal experience?’
“Stays wouldn’t be like that,” he repeats. He takes a deep breath, heart pounding in his chest. “Stays would accept my partner if I ever introduced her to you guys because you would trust that I have enough judgement to know when a relationship is right for me. Stays would be respectful because I really really like her and I want to be with her for a long time. Right?”
The chat goes crazy.
Even with the settings that Chan has to slow them down, there's so many comments that they don't appear on his screen for more than a fraction of a second before getting replaced. The ones that he does manage to see are mainly indecipherable keysmashes followed by a string of exclamation marks and question marks. But everyone seems to have caught on to the underlying message.
Chan just revealed that he's in a relationship with someone.
“It's just that nothing makes me more upset than when somebody, especially somebody that I don't know very well, tries to muck around with my personal life. And even worse if what they do ends up hurting other people in my life. Me? I can take it, but I draw the line at my family and friends who don't deserve it.”
Chan can feel himself getting worked up and has to stop himself, taking a deep breath and shaking his head as he blows it out, not wanting to reveal too much.
“Let’s just say that if someone were to try and get between my partner and I… I wouldn’t take it lightly.”
There, let everyone put together what he means on their own. It shouldn't be too difficult for people to make the right connections, everybody was already wondering about the lawsuit.
Chan's phone starts vibrating and he looks down to see that a manager is calling him. Not exactly a surprise but he was hoping to have a little more time before they found out. He declines the call, only for it to start ringing again immediately, a different staff member trying to get a hold of him. He declines again. When it starts ringing yet again, he almost reflexively declines it before he sees your name.
Smile starting to grow on his face, he doesn't accept the call, but doesn't decline it. Instead, he looks up and thanks Stays, then quickly ends the livestream.
“Hey,” he answers the phone casually. “What's up?”
“Bang Christopher Chan,” you say in a jokingly stern voice. “What did you do!?”
“Just what I should have done a loooong time ago,” Chan replies.
“Aren't you going to get in trouble?” you ask.
“Oh boatloads,” Chan agrees, trying not to sound too happy about it. He's not excited about all the scoldings and meetings and paperwork that are surely to come, but he can't help but be giddy knowing the reason behind it. “They're already calling me non-stop.”
“This was your way of ‘seeing what you can do?’” you ask incredulously, although there's also a hint of laughter in your voice. “You're insane.”
“What can I say? I'm a man of action. I didn't want to wait anymore.” Chan shrugs even though you can't see it.
“This doesn't mean I forgive you for everything that happened,” you warn.
“I never thought that it would,” Chan says honestly. “I know I have a lot of work to do to earn back your trust, but I promise I will never stop.”
“I'm almost at the studio, okay? See you in a second.”
Is all the warning Chan gets before the call ends. He twirls around in his seat and only has time to double check that the livestream has ended before there's a knock on his door.
This time, when you push open the door to Chan's studio, he's expecting you. His arms are already stretched wide, ready to catch you and hold you close.
read it on ao3 | part 1 | masterlist