this was my usage of free will for the night. i don't rly consider him a twink at all but sure he can still dress like one
posts zoomed in crops praying for tumblr to crush the quality less
light versions before i accidentally deleted the bg and noticed darkness was a much better vibe
yknow what? have an ed/nmsong on the house. nothing to do with anything in specific here (this fit demands a waltz or smth i suppose) im just vibing with his new unhinged era. vibe with me
theres something to be said about his mask, its importance, the way reisz doesnt wear their smiling mask, the way they kept/keeps taking his mask off as punishment but also the way it has to be lifted if he wants to have his few (negotiated) kissies, emotional crutches, comfort, identity & personhood, projection, and forced change/character development. its an unholy hour to be awake tho n i cant elaborate rn bc my mind is mush but let it be know there is . Something. very real and true
nm song of the day is The Shadow by Amigo The Devil:
whos the shadow here, i wonder...
^ free from draft jail at last. tweaked it a lil bit and could do more but we moving on
my 2024 version of this meme showed up in my notes recently and it reminded me i very much needed to redo it after so many in-game events. voilà here we have it
ty t6fs once again for the goated floc meme o7
this is the old version. i was still getting the hang of who the fresh hell reisz was (well. there wasnt anyone to be.) and what i was going for with their story & themes. a couple bits of the extra text on the other version got severed and split into two characters ;) if you've ever seen me mentioning a "hyacinth", that's where that stuff went. not to be confounded with "hyacinthe", my nem pc. she also got stuff tho. yeah i know i know its complicated & confusing. blame the second for remembering her name and thinking it was their name
fun fact: hyacinth was originally what the H. stood for - theres even tidbits in rei's journal in which they call themself "cinth". alas! turns out these weren't their memories! they do not know this. after so long, after brain damage, after so many other memories they made... they barely recall the memories of a lesser self at all.
close-up in case tumblr cronches the image too bad:
some notes & extra commentary:
🔅 they cut new scars on top of their burn scar, yes. they spent months without it bc the fire either melted it away or it got healed with the burns. not having a degree of muscle damage worsens their depersonalization issues... mfw the load-bearing pillar of ur sense of identity is pain
🔅 if u didnt know, surprise! their eyes became a permanent cosmogone mirror reflecting the parabolan skies ever since they got A Questioning of Riddlefishers! they actively suppress it with glasswork bc they usually don't want people attracted by the nostalgia while looking at them. they'd rather use their own hard-earned persuasive skills, thank you very much.
🔅 their hair is a little frazzled bc the ends got burned. (another random fun fact: did u know their hair is alive? now u do.)
🔅 height & weight is inconsistent bc of their shapeling arts bs. new limbs weight a lot, they take these on and off and i hc shaping with amber has a caloric cost on the body (its a biological process after all!), specially when done from within. yes the reisz is constantly hungry. they once developed an habit to eat any creepy crawlie they came across for a reason
🔅 when not doing Twilight Phantom work (parabolan guide & Orphanage-related), they have a billion epithets working as a silverer bc they dont usually introduce themself so. people just call them whatever.
🔅 faction is blank bc they became that much of a detached power. they fit best as a bohemian, but they do not particularly sympathize with one over another.
🔅 "appetite" is an inherited destiny. reisz has no destiny.
🔅 narrative theme was decided with their (subconscious) take from the main storylines theyve been in.
🔅 color: i ended up with an entire associate palette, but if we had to choose ONE its either That soft coral or #333138 (grey dark purple). if it were neathbow colours, though, they are cosmogone/peligin. (+ violant with the steel chair post-zenith...)
🔅 flower: the inherited bluebell vs the earned impossible blue rose ;)
🔅 animal: i was going to put an actual chimera but the 7th coil really was the start of it all. for funsies, tho, their entire multitudes: feline (black cat/jaguar), canine (marsh-wolf/eater-of-chains), serpentine (fingerkings, california kingsnake), chiropteran (1% curator blood influence + vampire motifs), and lyrebird (their singing themes + stolen voices thing + mimicry & emulating voice thru glasswork bc they have trouble with speaking). hence "chimera"...
🔅 you'd think their element would be fire, specially post-avulsion, right? well... there might be fire in their veins, but they were still born anew from water. cold water calls. born of the water, born of the flame. this is why they are a cold little thing in love with the fire.
🔅 this is also why hot x cold is a 50/50. in another sense they are Also hot (sex appeal LOL) and cold (personality towards 98% of people). very cosmogone in the way they attract with warmth but theres a chill underneath...
🔅eyes x hands: reisz woke up "blinded" (head wrapped up in a cowl), and the TBI from the vivisepulture on their first months of life gave them many vision issues for a while - they thought they were going to go blind and tried to train themself to not rely on vision much, covering their head/eyes very often. the TBI also gave them fine motor control issues, and they had many issues grasping things!
the brain damage healed away (long story) but they currently have the consequences from getting avulsed: once again, reisz has ongoing issues with their hands. (they did spend half a year eyeless too, tho)
🔅 tarot: Reisz has it reversed, but their body has it upright :)
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nm song of the day is Sun Bright Golden Happening by Frank Carter & The Rattlesnakes:
have the usual alt bonuses + a non-cosmogone bloomed screenshots. i used photopea for the blur effect on one of these since sai doesnt have these kinda tools. ty photopea. also i forgor to flip my canvas back... T▿T
their right hand is so fucked up fr... theyre having some trouble on their grip that is almost nostalgic to their TBI era. with the exception that now the difficulty comes due to it being stiff + having The Wire inside their flesh hurting like a bitch
mildly gorier versions + yapping & a writing snippet below the cut
I think one of the most triggering parts of the first half of the Avulsion period for Edward was the fact that, by suddenly falling into the role of caretaker, he gets to be effectively an orderly again.
He gets to care for a victim of moonmilk again. Restrain them, as he was taught to do, as he had once been; try to keep them from hurting themself; try to maintain them hydrated and clean, as it was occasionally needed to collect data; he has to run after them when they break free and, worst of all, he has to pull them from the fires they set when they lost the minimum of self-control they had. He was an orderly having to deal with an inmate at the peak of their insanity again, but this inmate is a legitimate monster that breaks their own limbs to escape from restraints and sets fire to the air with their body and voice.
This inmate is also the only person that matters.
Why did it have to be fire?
He gets to do all that while also having to face how he burned in the beginning and how he didn't have anyone to take care of him and how he had to endure that painful agony all on his own. Because of this same inmate.
And he can't even rejoice about it. He can't, because Fire took everything he had again. It was not fair then and it is not fair now.
But then! But then. Haha. When has life ever been fair to him, right? :)
the ref, which ive wanted to use since 2024 but never had the right Vibes for it up until recent developments + version without any filter layers to resize it lol
u may be wondering how did reisz feel. well for one they barely registered or paid attention to him, initially. he does not even remotely look like a fire. thats a ramble for another post but have this brief interlude that summarizes the transition to the better part of their defeated era
