#char:xb

[chubfan135]

First time joining @cupofmysteriousfluid's weekly drawpile! Super fun & welcoming, my hand kind of hurts because I'm rusty at drawing but I'm happy with the result! I am rotating fat x.B in my brain like a fish in a too-small bowl at all times (most recently in this post), so naturally I had to draw him 😋

Full image below the cut, tits are out and the bits are covered... but not clothed, though. :3

Fat fucking fishhhhh my beloved.

[chubfan135]

F.edxB more like. Feed-x.B. Being the server angel for free is awesome but he's got to start charging at some point, right? Why not in snacks?

Or maybe, even if he never asks for payment people start giving him food as thanks? x.B's likes to be self-sufficient, he's always "that guy who sucks to buy gifts for because they have everything". And what do you usually give people like that? That's right, food! Some kind of little treat. Little treats that add up over time... especially when his inventory's a mess from just dashing off to be F.edxB in the middle of a build so he's like "guess I'll eat this now!". Rinse repeat over the course of a stream weekend or two and hey presto you get one fat flying fish 🥰

[chubfan135]

SUMMER HEAT SUCKS SO BAD RAAAAAGHHHH... Quick, imagine massive mermaid / guardian hybrid xB starting work on his main base and absolutely decimating the local squid population during his lunch breaks. Whole shoals of salmon as a snack. Maybe scarfing down the occasional polar bear when he can get it. And then sinking down to the gravel bed of the frozen ocean for a nice chill nap while he digests, a thick layer of fat protecting him from the worst of the cold. GOD i wish that was me!!!!! 🤤🥵

[chubfan135]

🎉🎉🎉 Rejoice! Jubilation! Beef is selling cake at Half Foods, which means that I CAN RECYCLE ONE OF MY FAVE STUFFING SCENARIOS & MAKE XB HIS TASTE-TESTER. WOOOHOOO!!! Of course, xB didn't feature once in Beef's latest episode. But that won't stop me hehe

Speaking of xB though... he made an appearance in Hypno's episode. The two of them spent a good 15 minutes discussing food: spam (I'm not american so idk anything about that), spaghetti (of which xB is not a fan), and ramen, which both Hypno & xB very much enjoy. Anyway I think hypxb should challenge each other to a cute romantic ramen eating contest date at impulse's cybercity soup shop ↓ 😊

I'm picturing a nice cool evening, magic mountain (including the cyberpunk city) is basically empty due to people being off-world for the charity stream. Maybe the two of them take a little tour of the few games the server already has to offer, make a bit of a competition out of it, escalate to an elytra shootout battle above the shopping district... And after that they're still ribbing each other, finding stupid dares & things to compete over even though they're so tired. And hungry. Horse Head Farms more like I'm So Hungry I Could Eat A Horse Head Famished.

"Bet I can eat more noodles than you". "Oh yeah? Well first of all you're wrong, and second: not only am I gonna eat more than you but I'm gonna do it faster", and they're both in too much of a silly mood to admit defeat... even when they're both full to the brim and their bellies are heavy and sloshing with warm savoury broth. Never mind the crazy dives and loop-de-loops from their aerial sniper duel hours ago, by the time the villagers manning the shop finally kick them out they're almost too full to manage the lazy glide from magic mountain back to spawn.

They crash at Hypno's base because it's the closest. Hypno takes pity on xB & lets him stay the night, and they settle in for sleepy food coma cuddles in Hypno's gorgeous chocolate-and-candy-coloured bedroom... Until xB remembers he still has a few trial cakes leftover from the shulker Beef wanted his feedback on, and, well. Hypno's opinion would probably be valuable too, right? Right. And they haven't even had dessert yet, so... 😋 Unlike the competitive frenzy at the soup shop they take their sweet time with these cakes, although they're still trying to outdo each other in the "who can feed the other a bite of cake in the most arousing way possible" department. Quite a bit of cake ends up on them rather than inside them— luckily, cleaning it off each other is half the fun.

When the cake shulker is finally empty and their stomachs are so so full— no longer sloshy, but taught and gurgling from the sudden influx of sugar— they fuck so loud that Wels can hear it over in his castle.. because the horizontal firework launcher Hypno aimed at his knightly neighbour goes off every night/morning, and his & xB's combined bulk keeps tripping the sensor Hypno hooked up to the bed. :D

[chubfan135]

Obsessed with xB shop-and-soul-based fuckery ever since horse head farms in S8, so what if xBeef working together on xB's Half Foods shop leads to them sharing other things? What if Doublelife-esque soul-bound players, but instead of sharing hearts they literally share the food they eat? And in turn, the weight they gain? "The quickest way to a man's heart is through... your own stomach." Or something. lol

Readmore bc this got long and I'm paranoid about this post appearing in sfw hermit ship searches aaagh

Listen I just think there's something to be done with xB owning the shop, and it being styled after a convenience store with all your classic snack foods, and quick cheap golden carrots (obtained through countless hours grinding with villagers) being the first thing xB stocks the shop with, etc. And on the other side you have Vintage "Organic Farm-Fresh Produce" Beef coming in and supplying most of the other foodstuffs. And decorating the shop xB built with greenery and wall art and full shopping carts in the aisles. AND bumping up the prices on the golden carrots without telling xB because he could be making So much more... and Beef wants this shop to do well for xB, he really does! And xB's been grinding to stock the shop so much he barely has time to take care of himself, much less eat properly...

So Beef takes to sharing healthy filling snacks when they're both at the shop, brings over his latest salmon-based recipes to taste-test, invites xB over for dinner with increasing regularity... And yeah, MAYBE the portions he keeps serving him keep getting bigger, but he can't help it! xB just looks so cute when he eats, and his sharp guardian earfins look so striking in contrast to his rounding face, and of course Beef is super happy his friend enjoys his cooking so much— so happy that he doesn't notice that the effect he's having on his friend's waistline is being mirrored onto his own. 😊🤤✨

xB catches on way before Beef does, because some quirk of the shared food Thing makes it so they can faintly taste what the other person is eating. Beef doesn't notice bc he has a very varied diet (& later they're usually eating the same food anyway), but when they're hanging out one day and xB's mouth is suddenly flooded with the unfamiliar warmth of beetroot soup right as Beef takes a swig from his thermos xB is like "hold up there's something happening here", and over the next few [time unit idk] he starts putting things together. And then experimenting. xB's growing gut is perfectly comfortable in his loose shirt and hoodie, but how much can he eat before Beef registers the slight discomfort of his own mysteriously-stuffed belly straining his overalls? :3

...And then it's kink discoveries all over the place for both of them and basically they're both fat and happy and business partners who fuck and uhhhh food as a love language hell yeah. That's all :D