How early do you think alex realized she's bi? And when did gabe find out?
Ooh, very interesting question! Thank you for asking, this was fun to write :)
I think she just slowly figured it out during her teen years. It’s possible she met at least one kid at the Helping Hands group home who ran away from homophobic parents and listened to their story, including how they figured it out. There were probably more younger kids than teens in the system, but maybe she even had a crush or two.
When Alex considers the possibility that she isn’t straight, she has to mull it over for a long time. The thought “I’m not straight" doesn’t make her panic or hate herself, but there’s no easy “aha” moment, especially when Alex doesn’t feel comfortable confiding in anyone about it. For a long time, “I’m not straight" is all she can say with certainty, until, after saying it to herself in the mirror, in the shower, in a whisper lying in bed in the darkness of her room, “I’m bisexual” gradually replaces it. It’s weighty and foreign and new to her and she just lets it sit with her for awhile.
Months later, when the words finally start to feel as natural as the strings of her guitar under her fingertips, she decides to call Gabe. She’s written out a script and rehearsed in the mirror, but all her words fall out of her brain when Gabe answers the phone. It’s not their usual Thursday night call and even though she can't see auras through the phone, Alex can still see concern creasing her brother’s forehead when he picks up. She mentally kicks herself for asking him to video call. She can barely make it through their usual greetings, and Alex skips her typical complaining about the group home food.
“Before I start, I want you to know that this is really important to me. And I hope this doesn’t change the way you see me,” Alex says. Gabe just nods, so Alex takes a deep breath and says it: “I’m… bisexual.”
“Is that it?” is all he says in response.
“Is what it?”
“Is that all you wanted to tell me?”
Alex gapes at Gabe like a dying fish. “Well, yeah, but—“
And then Gabe just laughs. “Dude, I thought you were gonna tell me you got in trouble! Like, legal trouble! This is like, the best news you could’ve given me.”
“Really?” Her voice is thin and almost squeaky with disbelief.
“Yes! I got arrested when I was your age. There are so many worse things you could be doing at 16."
“Did you… just make a joke about going to juvie?"
“That’s not the point. Alex, seriously, why were you so nervous?”
“Sorry. It was stupid,” Alex mutters, stumbling all over her words and feeling like an idiot now. “I mean, I figured— I hoped? I guess I knew in the back of my head that you’d be cool with it, but… it’s not an easy thing to say, Gabe. To anyone. And even after I figured it out… I couldn’t stop thinking about how I never got to tell Mom and Dad. I just needed to make sure you would accept me. I need that from a family member. From… someone who won’t leave.”
Gabe is silent for a long time. Alex thinks he looks almost disappointed— in himself? Maybe he'd have a blue aura right about now.
His voice is much quieter when he says, “You should never have to worry about something like that. I’m only sorry that I never made it clearer that I’d accept and support you no matter what.”
“Stop,” Alex forces out, before pressing her fists to her eyes to keep herself from crying.
“Oh no, I can’t now,” Gabe grins. “I’m gonna be like, obnoxiously supportive from now on. Just you wait."
"Okay," is all Alex can manage, smiling through her tears.
"Oh— sorry, I’d love to talk more but I have to go now. My shift starts in 15. Talk to you Thursday?”
