Hiii I saw ur requests were open. Can I request for an angst story for idol!jeonghan and mc? But can it have a happy ending too? Yes i love angst but I want a happy ending so my heart wont hurt that much 🥺
- 🍑 anon
hi anon, i'm SO sorry this took forever to write, but it's finally here T^T hope it was the right amount of angst, but plz let me know! also, i wrote w a fem!reader but if that's not what you wanted, i can go back and make adjustments :) hope you enjoy this one <3
[requests: CLOSED]
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my idiot
pairing: idol!jeonghan x idol fem!reader
genre: angst with a happy ending :)
word count: 2k
warnings: none
my masterlist ＼ʕ •ᴥ•ʔ／
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Good luck with your performance today ^^ (1)
You stared at your phone, the little ‘1’ by your message still there, indicating that your boyfriend had yet to see it. It was strange that he hadn’t responded, much less read it, considering you sent it eight hours ago. You were with your band mates in the waiting room while other groups performed ahead of you.
“Where are you going?” your manager asked.
“Bathroom,” you replied.
“Okay, don’t take too long.”
The hallway was bustling with stylists, makeup artists, managers, and other idols as you maneuvered your way to the crowd. You finally made it to the bathroom but not before bumping into a familiar face.
“Jeonghan, hi.” Since the two of you debuted the same year, there was no need for formalities. Besides, everyone knew of your groups’ friendship, so an interaction like this one wasn’t likely to spark rumors.
“Huh? Oh, hi.” Your boyfriend’s voice was short. This wasn’t like him. Usually, even in public, he’d greet you with a warm smile, but today he looked… out of it.
“Are you okay?”
“Yeah, fine.” And that’s when you knew he was lying.
You looked around to make sure no one saw you before grabbing his arm and pulling him into the stairwell. “What’s wrong?” you prodded.
“Nothing, I’m fine.”
“Jeonghan, I know you better than that and you know better than to try to lie to me like this. You can trick everyone else, but not me.”
He didn’t say anything for a while, only staring out the window of the broadcasting building. Finally, he sighed. “Okay, fine. I’m upset.”
You furrowed your eyebrows at him. “At me?”
“No, not really.”
“What do you mean by ‘not really’?”
“I…It’s just…”
“Jeonghan,” you chided.
“It’s the rumors, okay? I’m mad about the rumors.”
“Rumors? What rumors—” Oh. Just last week, a tweet went viral from a netizen stating they saw two people on a date. They didn’t write your name directly, but they alluded to you and your co-star, Yoo Sangkyun, whom you were starring in a drama with. To make matters worse, the netizen even uploaded a blurry photo of the two of you, your backs to the camera. The truth was that Sangkyun was walking you out after dinner had wrapped up while your manager went to pull the van around. You didn’t think much of it because both of you were just friends. In fact, Sangkyun often told you about how much he loved his girlfriend and how he would buy her flowers every week. “Jeonghan, you know those aren’t true—”
“I know it’s not true, but why hasn’t your company said anything?”
“Maybe they’re just trying to milk it for the drama. You know, PR stuff.”
“It’s annoying. Can’t you talk to your CEO or something?”
“You know I don’t have a say in any of those things.” He did know, but that didn’t stop him from being annoyed. He didn’t hate the rumors themselves, but he hated reading the comments about how you and Sangkyun had so much chemistry and that they couldn’t imagine you with anyone else. It irked him to no end. That should be him that they’re saying that about. But of course, being idols, it’s hard to go public with your relationships—one could only imagine the sheer chaos for both sides if either of your fans found out. Besides, the industry was already grueling enough, neither of you wanted external drama. You’d gone almost a year already dating Jeonghan in secret, and things had been fine up until this point.
Your phone pinged with a message from your manager.
Where are you? It’s showtime.
“I have to go,” you told him.
“Whatever,” he replied. Your heart dropped with his cold words, doing your very best not to cry as you opened the door of the stairwell. Your stylists would not be happy having to redo your makeup again right before you had to go on stage.
———
Your performance passed by in a blur, your body and voice going through the motions but never fully present. All you could think about was your conversation with Jeonghan just moments prior. Thoughts invaded your headspace, so much so that you had completely missed it when your manager told your group you were nominated for your first win.
Now, you were standing at the front of the stage while the MCs waited for the total scores to be tallied. Across from you, Jeonghan stared blankly at the screens in front of him, stealing glances at you every once in a while. You couldn’t bring yourself to look at him, or anywhere, for that matter. Your eyes glazed over as you tried to keep them open to avoid any kind of suspicion.
Just then, confetti popped out in front of you as you heard the MCs announce your group’s name, congratulating you. The rest of the members stared at each other in disbelief, tears streaming down their faces. When you had come to your senses and realized what was happening, you too began crying. The other girls held onto you, their faithful leader, as one of the MCs handed you the trophy and a mic for your speech.
You quickly composed yourself and cleared your throat. “Thank you so much for this incredible honor. We are so thankful to our CEO, our manager, all of our staff and also our fans for making our dreams come true. We are also thankful for our friends and family who have supported us behind the scenes. Thank you so much again, we will work even harder to come back with better music!”
Jeonghan watched you from behind as he and his group made their way off stage. A part of him knew he had something to do with your tears, and even worse, now you were crying on national TV. The encore stage played, but you found yourself in the corner crying your eyes out, trying to avoid the cameras. Most people would assume you were crying out of joy and sheer happiness, but little did they know. Jeonghan watched you on the TV, his heart sinking the more his eyes lingered on your form through the screen.
“Did you do something to her?” Hoshi said jokingly, though his words hit way too close to home.
“She’s crying pretty hard,” Seungkwan noted. By now, Jeonghan got the point. He messed up and everybody, including him, knew. Both of your managers and groups all knew about your relationship before the two of you even told them. They were good troopers, knowing that neither of you would do anything to jeopardize the groups’ reputations or careers.
You piled into the waiting room as your staff cheered for you. You were holding the trophy, and though it was heavy, it certainly wasn’t heavier than the burden in your heart. You wanted to be happy, you wanted to be celebrating with the rest of your group, but it was too hard to rid your mind of Jeonghan’s face from a couple hours ago. The car ride home wasn’t any easier — your silence didn’t go unnoticed by your members, their concern building as you stared blankly out the window.
The moment you arrived at your dorm, you locked yourself in your room. A muffled pain in your chest suffocated you. After crying your heart out on public TV, there were no more tears left to cry. You curled up into a ball, trying to take deep breaths to calm yourself.
You heard a knock on your door followed by one of the girls calling your name. “We’re going out to eat to celebrate,” she said.
“I’m not hungry,” you told them.
“You should eat,” another added.
“I’m okay. You guys go. I don’t feel well.”
“Do you want us to bring back some food?”
“I’ll be okay,” you responded. “Don’t worry about me.”
“Okay…” Their footsteps faded and you heard the front door shut.
A bit later, there was another knock, this time at the front door. You figured one of the members had left something at the dorm so you mustered the strength to hoist yourself out of bed. What, or who, you saw at the door came as a complete surprise.
“Hi.”
Your knees buckled at the sight of him.
“What are you doing here?” you asked.
“Can I come in?”
You took a deep breath and stepped out of the way to allow him entry into your dorm.
“Um, these are for you,” he continued. He moved his hands from behind his back and held forth a bouquet of flowers. “Congrats on your win.”
“Thank…you…” You couldn’t help but furrow your brows in confusion as you took hold of the stems from his hands. You wandered awkwardly into the kitchen to look for a vase as Jeonghan stood in the living room mulling over what to say to you. Giving up after a while, you set the flowers on the counter by the sink and invited him to sit down at the dining table in your small apartment.
If you were being honest, you weren’t really in the best state to be talking to Jeonghan at the moment. If anything, it would have been best to sleep it off, but Jeonghan knew he had to come talk to you before the guilt ate away at him from the inside out.
“Whatever you have to say, say it fast,” you told him, avoiding his eyes. “It’s been a long day and I’m tired.”
Not exactly the words he wanted to hear from his oh-so-loving girlfriend, but considering the events leading up to this moment, maybe he deserved it. “I’m sorry.” Now he had your attention. “I’m really sorry for the way I handled everything. I was really stressed with our comeback and preparations. I couldn’t get the dance down and I stayed longer with Hoshi after practice, but it was too hard and I was too tired. Then I saw the news that you were casted in the drama with Sangkyun.”
“Jeonghan—”
He put his hand up. “No, wait. Let me finish. I know I shouldn’t have been this way, but I was just…jealous. And the rumors didn’t do anything to help, but I know that’s not an excuse for my behavior. I knew better, but I let my pride and stubbornness get in the way.”
You sat in silence for a while as you tried to process your thoughts and feelings, much to Jeonghan’s chagrin. He was nervouslly drawing shapes on the kitchen table with his finger while he awaited your answer. All he wanted was for everything to be okay again, but he also knew that it wouldn’t come so easily.
“I hope you can forgive me,” he muttered. Soon, he realized he said it without really meaning to, though it was true. “But it’s okay if you don’t. I completely understand,” he corrected himself.
“Jeonghan, I… I don’t know what to say.” You were at a loss for words, your heart being wrenched in ways it’d never been before.
He stood up abruptly. “It’s okay. You don’t have to say anything. I just wanted to let you know, but you can take all the time you need. Just know, you mean everything to me and I am so sorry for hurting you and being the biggest idiot in the world.”
You watched him turn around and move to the door slowly, slipping his shoes on with melancholy.
“Jeonghan, wait.” You stood up and followed him. He turned around and looked at you with sad eyes. Your fingers found his as you laced them together, squeezing them tight as if you wouldn’t ever let go. “You may be an idiot, but at least you’re my idiot.”
“Does this mean you forgive me?” His eyes lit up with hope.
“I’m beginning to,” you corrected him. “With something like this, it’s going to take a lot more than a couple flowers and words to make up for it.”
“I’ll do everything I can to make it up to you. I promise.” Before you knew it, you were enveloped in his embrace, his touch warm and comforting like a home you’d always return to. “I love you. So much.”
“I love you, too, Yoon Jeonghan.”