The Chipotle Ordering Guide and Masterpost.
So. Throughout my 3 years working with this company, I’ve considered making this... and ya know what. I’m in a mood. And I’ve got the time. Let’s go.
A. Line Etiquette 1 - Get off your phone. Period.
2 - Use your words. We’re excellent point-guessers; but please, it’s much easier if you speak. Really. Because that millimeter difference on the other side of the glass means I’m gonna put the wrong thing in your food, and guess what, I’m not gonna be upset when you get mad about it.
3 - Do. Not. Put. Your. Nasty. Ass. Hands. Over. The. Glass.
4 - Politeness. There is literally zero reason to be in-a-huff, or rude, or nasty, or unreasonable to any of the crew members. Zero. If you’re there for lunch, then most, if not all of those people have been there as early as 7am or 8am. If you’re there for dinner, those folks probably only arrived around 3pm or 4pm but they are also going to be there until 11pm at least. Be patient.
5 - LISTEN. We literally have a basic “script” of the entire line that we are speaking to each and individual customer. So PAY. ATTENTION. When we ask if you want something, actually take the .0002 seconds to listen to what you’re being asked so we can make your order correctly. 97% of order mistakes/errors are because we ask if the customer wants something, they say one thing and mean something else. Or they’re not paying attention, chatting with the person next to them, on their phone, or just pointing. In all of those cases, the customer has 0 excuse for getting upset.
6 - Know what you want. - You’ve spent how long in line? Your order should be ready to go by the time you get to the front. **DISCLAIMER** If you’re new, or an infrequent customer, please let the crew know, so we know to take our time and even help explain the menu to you. We’re here to try and make your experience as smooth as possible, and get you in and out quickly and efficiently. And if the line stresses you out, order online. There’s a separate section further down to cover the questions/concerns with that process.
7 - Portions - Yes the standard portion sizes are the same for all entrees. Most items are offered at 4oz increments (exception being Queso and Vinaigrette). That’s the equivalent to one of those small plastic side-cups we have; or one average-sized spoonful. That’s it. Calm your sh*t. Anything can be double-portioned for free except for meat, queso, and guac. Technically, anything beyond two portions of any item will also cost a dollar for each additional serving. So for those of you who get 4 scoops of rice and 3 scoops of beans, be glad you’re not getting charged an additional $3.
8 - Non-Entree Orders - If you’re just getting a drink, or chips n’ guac, you don’t need to wait in line. By all means, just go right up to the front and hop in-between orders! You really only need to wait in line if you’re getting an entree.
B. The Tortilla Station. 1 - Meal Options - We have: Burritos, Bowls, Salads, Tacos, Quesadillas, Kids Meals, Nachos, and Quesarritos. 1a - If you’re planning on getting a metric-f*ckton of food, either get a bowl or a double-wrap burrito. Otherwise, the tiny tortillas we have are going to tear. If not once, then 2 or 3 times. 1b - Salads are a bowl with lettuce on the bottom. That lettuce is supposed to replace the rice and beans in a bowl. So don’t be surprised or upset when you order a salad and we then go straight to meats. Also, just fyi, it is the exact. same. lettuce. at the end of the line, it is literally just cut into a different shape. 1c - Tacos come in a set of three, unless you specify a different number. That said, if you get tacos, that means each one gets 1/3 of a portion. Not a full portion of something in each taco. 1d - Quesadillas come as either just cheese, or a meat and a cheese. Some stores MIGHT let you put one more item in it. Most stores enforce the policy that “anything more than just meat and cheese, and you will be charged for a full burrito.” Additionally, we all highly recommend getting any cold or wet sides, on. the side. Otherwise, it is too messy and could literally damage our equipment if that moisture leaks onto the press. Please, just ask for it on the side. That said, most quesadillas with come with 1 or 2 complementary sides, like sour cream or hot salsa. Though, this is not universal. 1e - Kid’s meals are designed for children; but, anyone can order them. If you want something small and less expensive, that’s totally fine. BUT You need to respect and understand the limitations of this menu item. Kid’s meals come in 2 forms: small quesadilla which comes with a side of rice, and a side of beans (or two salsa sides); or build-your-own tacos which comes with 2 taco shells and 3 sides of. the. entire. line. So if you wasted all 3 sides on rice, beans, and meat, that’s it. It’ll be a dollar extra if you want anything from the cold side. Typically, it’s good to balance a meat, and two sides from the salsa side. Or even all 3 from the salsa/cold side. But just know, the kid’s meals do not come with more than that. They are, in fact, for children. 1f - Nachos are a fairly new secret menu item. Basically it’s similar to the way a salad works. Instead of rice and beans, you start with a bag of chips on the bottom of the bowl. You will still be charged for a bag of chips with your order. They’re just at the bottom of the bowl instead of in a bag. And yes, you’re supposed to skip rice and beans with these as well. 1g - If there’s a line, don’t get a f*cking quesarrito.
2 - Rices - We have White Rice and Brown Rice. They. Are. Both. Cilantro. Lime. I do understand our menu panels are not super helpful with that bit. The difference is white rice is cooked with more oil and prepared with more salt. Our brown rice, is a bit healthier. Also, it is not dirty rice. It is not fried rice. It is not refried rice. It is not yellow rice. We literally just asked you “White or brown?”
3 - Beans - We have Black Beans and Pinto Beans. Not Red Beans (Because in different places, “red beans” can be applied to both types). Not refried beans. Not indian beans. Not yellow beans. And no, neither beans have any meat in them, they are both totally veg.
4 - Fajitas - Sauteed peppers and onions, seasoned with oregano and salt. Free with any entree. Please tell us you want them before we get to meat. And DEFINITELY before getting to salsa.
5 - The Meats - We have: Chicken, Steak, Barbacoa, Carnitas, and Sofritas. The Chorizo was discontinued after the release of Queso. You might find some stores still offering it, as they are trying to clear out what was stored at the distributors; though by now, it’s not likely. 5a - Say it with me slowly: Bar-Buh-Co-Uh. Not barbaCOLA, Not BarBOCA. The Barbacoa is shredded beef. The Carnitas is pulled/shredded pork. And our Sofritas is a brazed/shredded tofu. 5b - The order of least-spicy to most-spicy is as follows: Carnitas - No spice what-so-ever. Sofritas & Chicken - both have light-medium spice respectively. Barbacoa - pretty spicy. Steak - the spiciest meat, though still tamer than our hot salsa. 5c - Double meat costs extra. Corporate policy. And if that standard 4oz portion isn’t good enough for you, then don’t complain about the extra cost. Period. We literally don’t care if “another store gives you more.” Respect our policies, you are a guest. And no, contrary to popular belief, the customer is not always right. 5d - You can get half-n-half of two protein/meat options. But that means you will get 2oz of each. Not a full scoop. If you do this, you will get charged for the more expensive of the two choices. (ex: half-chicken, half-steak = price of a steak bowl).
6 - Queso - It’s new, it’s a bit weird. And quite honestly, when it was first released, they had not solidified the recipe. Stores were getting different variations of the same stuff on a semi-daily basis. Now though, things have seemed to calmed down and they’re sticking to something that actually works pretty well. It is a cheese sauce, with a sofritas base, and incorporates ingredients from our Medium Green and Hot tomatillo salsas. It does cost extra. All restaurants now have a little placard on their line explaining the new costs. Also, the extra costs are listed on a giant menu board above the line. (personally, I feel the queso tastes best in an entree rather than just on the side)
C. The Salsa Station 1 - Mild, Medium, or Hot? - If you say “no thanks” then we are moving on to Sour Cream and Cheese. So please pay attention. Really. Cannot stress this enough. 1a - Mild is the tomato salsa. Yes, it’s a salsa. Yes there are (usually) some jalepenos in it, so there is still a small kick. 1b - Medium green and the Red hot are the two tomatillo salsas. Consequently, if you ask for the “red salsa” we assume the red hot tomatillo salsa. Do not say “red” if you mean the mild. Yes, it’s technically ‘red’ in color; but semantics is literally everything here. 1c - We technically have 4 salsas. (FOUR?! WHAT?!) Yes. The. Corn. Is. A. Salsa. It has a medium spice; therefore, when we ask “Mild, Medium, or Hot?” it is encompassed in that ‘Medium’ category.
2 - Sour Cream or Cheese? - First of all, it’s sour cream. SOUR. CREAM. It is not: marshmallow, cream cheese, yogurt, vanilla, mayonnaise, nor cool whip. Like, where do you even think you are? 2b - It’s cheese. It’s just shredded cheese. It’s not noodles. We do not offer noodles at a Mexican Restaurant. 2c - As we do not have spoons for cheese, the standard portion size of 4oz is measured by a ‘three-finger pinch.’ If that’s not enough, please just ask; but understand, technically extra cheese beyond two portions should cost you an additional dollar.
3 - Guacamole / “Guac” - We no longer have to tell you it costs extra. This is because, similar to the Queso, there are now placards on the glass directly in front of you explaining the additional costs. So, the recurring theme: Pay. Attention. 3a - It comes in the same portion size as everything else. 4 ounces. If you want double, then you’re going to pay double. 3b - If you do not order a meat or sofritas, yes it is free. BUT If you order it on your entree and then again on the side, you will be charged for it. Also, while Sofritas is a vegan option, it is still one of our major proteins and does not constitute free guac. 3c - With the rollout of queso and our new “large” side-cups, you can technically order ‘large guac.’ You will then be charged for 2 sides of guac. BUT PLEASE TAKE NOTE: The “Large” side cup offers 6oz. A regular side cup is 4oz. Which means, it’s smarter to just order two sides of guac, and get a full 8oz instead of paying for the novelty of a large side-cup and only getting 6oz. 3d - In Chipotle’s effort to serve non-GMO, fresh, locally-sourced food, we often get cases of avocados that are either under- or over-ripe. When this happens, the guacamole no longer keeps that bright lime-green color. Often, especially with over-ripe avocados, the inside of the avocados are yellow, or even slightly brown. Even if only a few avocados out of a case are in this condition, in can discolor the entire batch of guac. That said, the color does not affect the taste; nor is it any less fresh than any other day. All guac is made fresh every single morning. The slight browning after it’s been mashed is called “oxidization” it’s the same process that happens to the inside of an apple if it’s exposed to the air for longer than 5 minutes.
4 - Lettuce - Many stores may not offer this to you directly. Why? Because that shredded lettuce is supposed to be saved for tacos only. That said, by all means, if you want it, order it. It also is served with a ‘three-finger-pinch’; so, don’t get upset if you’re not served an entire fistful of lettuce. And yes, all of it is cut fresh every single morning.
D. The Cashier (and Their Expo) 1 - Expediter “Expo” - Typically seen during the two peak hours of the day (12pm-1pm and 6pm-7pm), this person stands between salsa and the cashier. Their main responsibility is to communicate your order to the cashier and package your order with all its parts. Their typical spiel is: “Any chips or drinks with your order?” Or "Anything to drink or chips with that today?” Or something similar. THIS. IS. YOUR. MOMENT. Like this is your exact chance to say any and all sides you want with your order. Nothing peeves us more than “No, but can I get a water cup?” or “No thanks, can I get chips and salsa?” Like. WHAT TF DID I JUST ASK YOU?! So again, in our running theme: PAY. ATTENTION.
2 - Chips - All chips are made fresh every morning. They literally go stale after a full day, if they seem “stale” then they were just under-cooked. We cannot/do not serve stale chips. We now have two sizes: Regular (4oz) the same we’ve always had, and Large (6oz). We cannot serve kid’s chips unless it is for a kid’s meal. If some stores do this, they will typically add a $1 charge for the additional side of kid’s chips.
3 - Drinks - We have Fountain Sodas (Coke Products); bottled Nantucket Nectars, bottled water, and bottled Izze carbonated juices. Most stores offer the following flavors: Pomegranate Cherry, Apple, Pineapple Orange Banana, and Peach Orange Nantucket Nectars; and then Clementine, Blackberry, and Grapefruit Izze’s. Some stores may vary.
4 - Kid’s Meal Sides - All kid’s meals come with a chips or fruit. The kid’s chips are 2oz. The fruit is typically one of three things: clementine oranges, grapes, or a packet of blueberries. The fruit options change as they become available. Other locations may offer different fruit options. 4b - All kid’s meals also come with one of the following drinks: white milk, chocolate milk, apple juice, or small cup for soda. *THIS IS THE ONLY INSTANCE A WATER CUP MAY BE USED FOR SODA.*
5 - Gift Cards - Yes, we offer gift cards. They’re particularly popular during the holiday season. If you purchase them with a credit/debit card, please confirm that they were fully paid for and activated. Too often, customers in a hurry will walk away before their credit card cleared our computer; and if that transaction declines, they gift an inactive card with $0 balance. Leading to a bad time for everyone. So please, when you purchase gift cards with a credit/debit card, make sure it clears before you leave. This issue doesn’t happen if the cards are paid for with cash.
E. Dining Room Etiquette 1 - CLEAN. UP. AFTER. YOURSELF. - Pretty self-explanatory. But seriously people. Take your tabasco bottles back to the drink station. Throw your trash away. It’s common sense. Ya’ll people disgusting animals sometimes.
2 - Tabasco Bottles - These are not available for sale; and, they are most certainly not available for theft!! The reason you can’t seem to find any, is because people decide to pocket them. Daily. Really folks? You’re better than that.
3 - WATER CUPS - Most times, it’s grown-ass people trying to sneak this. Water cups are for water. only. If we catch you with soda, you can either throw it out and get water, or come up to the register and pay for a soda. If we catch you twice, you will be forced to either pay for a soda or leave the restaurant. If you are a constant repeat offender, we may reserve the right to not serve you. Yes. That’s right. At that point you are a thief; and, have lost the trust of the company. While it is a minor theft, it is stealing nonetheless. *P.s. you ain’t slick tryna get lemonade in that either. We see you.
4 - Children - If they are well-behaved, beautiful. Wonderful. Enjoy that tiny quesadilla and apple juice box! HOWEVER. If they are screaming, please either tame or remove them. Additionally, our dining room is NOT a jungle-gym. Please keep your children from running all over the place, from climbing onto other guests’ chairs, and if-applicable, from climbing on the window ledges and getting their tiny sticky handprints all over our windows. Thank you.
F. Ordering Online or Via Mobile App 1 - Second Make-Line - Typically, for the lunch and dinner rushes, a separate make-line is opened up for take-out orders only. Though, in the early morning, midday, and after 8pm, this line is closed.
2 - Punctuality - Typically, orders are began roughly 15 minutes before their scheduled pickup time. That way, longer orders can be completed in time for their scheduled pickup time. That said, if you place an order at noon for a 12:15 pickup time, do not arrive at 12:05. Your order will not be ready. Consequently, do not pick it up at 12:45. Your order will be cold. In both situations, the customer does not have the right to complain.
3 - Extras - Our online and mobile app does fairly well to include extras, half-portions, and any sides for your order. However, if there is something you want included in the order that isn’t listed, you can dedicate a portion of the “name” on the ticket to your extra note. Also, please make sure to include everything in your order so it can be ready. It is always a bit perturbing to make additional sides for orders that should already be completed and ready to hand out.
4 - Payment - We do offer two options for payment. The more common option is to pre-pay via credit or debit card. There is a second option, to ‘pay-at-pickup’ however; this option is only available if you create an account on the website. So, if you don’t want to be forced to pre-pay with a card, take the extra 2 seconds to make a quick account. It is worth the hassle.
5 - Phone Orders - We can no longer accept orders over the phone. We no longer receive the fax forms or other sheets to take orders over the phone. Additionally, it wastes too much of an employee’s time to answer the phone, find a spare sheet of paper and writing utensil, and sit down to listen to you scramble over yourself trying to place an order of questionable coherency. This is a fast-paced restaurant, and that person probably has 6 other online orders to make. Place it through the app or website like everyone else. And if you say ‘but i’m driving’ get off your phone. Like seriously.
6 - Ordering for Multiple People - Do not place an online order for more than 4-6 people. Really. The ticket that prints out is ridiculous and orders can very easily fall prey to being incorrectly prepared. Additionally, if your order is deemed unreasonably long (Typically 20 or more orders) the restaurant has the right to call you and deny the order. At that point, it is considered a catering order and requires 24-hr notice.
G. Catering Yes, we do it. It requires 24-hr notice. Do not call the store to coordinate it. Call 1.800.Chipotle and they will sort you out. (Also, yes, we know the ‘E’ in Chipotle is an extra digit, it’s no big deal). And please, let us handle everything. There is literally zero need to try and micro-manage your order. Furthermore, make sure that whoever is picking up the order has a large enough vehicle for transportation. The worst is when someone arrives in a 2-door, no-trunk, smartcar-lookin-thing to pick up a catering for 60 people.
So that’s it. Well... most of it anyway. I’m sure there’s more minutia that I didn’t cover; but, quite honestly, that’s just about everything. To my fellow chipotle crew, I salute you. And to all the customers: regulars, newbies, young and old, please, make all our lives easier and pay attention; be kind; and have a great day.