Dwight: Good responses for being stabbed with a knife? Baldric: Rude. Chlowig: That’s fair. Gretta: Not again. Hexela: Are you going to want this back?
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Dwight: Good responses for being stabbed with a knife? Baldric: Rude. Chlowig: That’s fair. Gretta: Not again. Hexela: Are you going to want this back?
Dwight in Shining Armor
I really need more people to watch this absolutely ridiculous 30 minute sitcom. It's on BYUtv.org which is free. Watching this show is like eating cotton candy. There is absolutely no substance or nutritional value but it is an absolute DELIGHT
Seriously, guys, this show is basically Tumblr catnip. It features Princess Gretta the Besieged, a badass warrior princess from 1,000 years in the past; and her Champion, Sir Dwight, the diplomatically smart but bumbling modern high school guy who has to deal with the chaos.
I love it so much.
Dwight in Shining Armor Reverse AU
So I haven't seen anything like this written or drawn by anyone else but I'm sure other people thought of it.
One day, a girl named Gretta is riding her bike to the forest near Woodside. She goes to a clearing where she uses the open space to practice lacrosse and overall just to enjoy the quiet of nature. While practicing, she loses her ball in the woods nearby and she ventures into the woods to get it. After some time, she finally finds her ball but right as she bends down to pick it up, she's suddenly startled by an owl and is sent stumbling back. The ground collapses as she falls into a cave below and lands face first on something solid. She coughs as she wipes the dust off her lips and looks down to see a boy about her age dressed as a prince. His eyes open wide, startling her backwards to try to get away from him. The Prince quickly gets up while scrambling to pull his sword from its sheath. Gretta grabs her lacrosse stick and holds it defensively towards the Prince as he points his shaking sword at her. Panicked, he asks "Mortal enemy or harmless peasant?" in a scared and defensive tone. All Gretta can say is a confused "what?" as a sudden woman's voice shouts "Hold, your highness". Just then, an aged woman dressed as a high priestess appears telling the prince to lower his sword and revealing that the spell worked. Gretta is at a loss for words when the prince asks "Who is this girl, Nana?". The High priestess says "I'm afraid she's the one who has awakened you, Prince Dwight. She is your champion." Dwight pauses for a moment to look at Gretta, then to Nana and then back to Gretta before saying "This dirty brute? This horrid, mannerless wolf pup?". Gretta is visibly offended by his insults. She stands up to say "Whoa. I just fell down a hole by mistake and now I'm getting insulted for it?". Dwight turns to Nana demanding a new champion but Nana cannot change the rules of The Champion Spell since it was sealed with Gretta's kiss. Embarrassed, Gretta says "No. No no, I didn't kiss anyone. I never kissed anyone." with a bright blush on her face. Prince Dwight looks at her and says "I am awake, therefore you kissed me. As per the contract." he points to a carved contract on the wall. Gretta decides to just back away from these crazy people and leave but she backs right into the sneering face of a troll. She immediately bashes the creature with her stick which stuns him enough for Dwight, Nana and Gretta to leave the dark cave towards the town of Woodside.
The story plays out the same as the show but this time, Dwight is the millennium old Prince who is reluctant to use violence and prefers diplomacy over what little fighting skills he has. As a Prince, he understands the value of talking through issues instead of just fighting, but as more time passes with Gretta, he learns that standing up for yourself is not only necessary but rewarding.
His only living relative is his High Priestess grandmother, Nana who uses magic to protect Dwight until Gretta accidentally breaks her staff. Nana relies on her knowledge of the occult to solve problems while also acting as a guiding hand for her beloved grandson.
Gretta is the modern girl who thrives for sports, specifically lacrosse and she prefers simple life to complicated things like school and technology. She's not doing well in her classes but she has plenty of street smarts which is very useful when looking after a pacifist like Dwight. The more time she spends with Dwight, the more she starts to open up to people and even does a little better in her studies.
From a young age, Gretta lost her parents and was put into the foster system which means she has moved around from home to home. She currently lives with her foster dad, Baldrick or "Rick" for short. He's the only guardian that Gretta has formed a bond with. Rick works as a pharmacist in Woodside but also dabbles in street magic as a hobby which has cheered up Gretta more than once.
Rick was even kind enough to take in Gretta's only cousin Chlodwig (Misspelled "Chadwick" on his birth certificate). Chlodwig never goes to school and mostly spends his time wandering wherever he wants. Since he graduated, he's got all the time in the world to talk to girls, see the sights and even pick a few fights with a local restaurant owner.
Nana didn't know what to expect when she and Dwight woke up but she didn't expect to run into her old Coven sister, Hexcela. Last time she saw Hexcela, she was a withered old hag, now she's a gorgeous, black haired woman who has opened up her own cosmetics shop called Lotions and Potions. She's set up right across from Rick's pharmacy which makes their interactions a daily occurrence. Hexcela teases Rick about his fake magic but is secretly amazed that he can do magic tricks without magic which leads to more teasing/flirting.
This clip runs through my head at least once a week.
Watch "Soldier Poet King by The Oh Hellos [Dwight in Shining Armor]" on YouTube
BONUS: Funny GIFs from some of Dwight and Gretta's robotic baby adventures for their family life class
@giftober 2022 Day 16: Family / Found family
The Dwight in Shining Armor Facebook page is top-tier.
“Lesson 1: Danger is everywhere.”
“Lesson 2: Peril lurks in every corner.”
“Lesson 3: Jeopardy is ever present.”
— Chlodwig, a man of wise words