Why I am SICK of Jesus x Mary Magdalene (the ship)
But first, a couple disclaimers:
I'm not against (fictional) stories that explore potential romantic relationships for Jesus. It's a totally fair dealbreaker for a lot of people, but that's not where I'm coming from. HOWEVER, I'm a picky shipper and this is Jesus, so I am very specific about the ships that appeal to me.
I'm not against Mary Magdalene. AT ALL. As you'll see, part of my problem with this ship is that it (or the way it's often portrayed) does her a disservice. But understand that any hate directed at MM in response to this post will not be tolerated.
All right. Buckle up, brothers and sisters in Christ.
POINT 1: THE CONSPIRACY
I am going to keep this fairly short because it could be its own post, but I'm also putting it first to get it out of the way. I cannot tell you how DONE I am with the "Mary Magdalene was Jesus's wife" conspiracy theories and justifications. I am SO tired of the insistence that their marriage or extramarital romance has been a big secret for 2000 years that the Church covered up because (name dumb reason here) because NO. Anyone who subscribes to it doesn't actually care about Mary Magdalene or Jesus or "the truth."
That's all I'm gonna say.
POINT 2: OKAY ... STILL KINDA ABOUT THE CONSPIRACY
It's a shame that Jesus and MM have been dragged into this discourse of "were they actually lovers/spouses?" because I could see how, purely as a speculative idea, a romantic relationship between them could be really sweet or thematically meaningful. But you know how, when something is popular but it's always presented in a way that feels like people are taking the easy way out in their interpretations and you're just ... overexposed to all the bad takes? The fact Jesus and MM are the go-to idea of a Bible ship that isn't real and hasn't been handled well (imo) has done a lot to sour me on them as a romantic pair.
POINT 3: NOT SUPPORTED BY CANON
This touches on a personal preference. Might sound weird, but I'm ok with the concept of non-canon ships if I think they still make sense. But going by what we see of Jesus and MM in the Bible ... romantically, I don't think they make sense. The reason is going to lead into the next point, but for this section, I'll say this:
Mary Magdalene is important, but she's not the only woman in Jesus's ministry like so often portrayed in media.
Mary Magdalene was at the cross ... so was John, and so were several other women.
Mary Magdalene saw the resurrected Jesus first ... according to John's and Mark's gospels. The other gospels put Mary at the tomb and first appearance, too, but she's not the only woman there.
The gospels show that Mary was important without singling her out in such a way (most of the time) that we sense a romantic tension between her and Jesus. She gets a fair amount of press without communicating the idea that she was Jesus's greatest love or soulmate.
Now I recognize that some scholars have questioned if Mary Magdalene is the "beloved disciple" from John's gospel. My opinion? No. It's pretty obvious the beloved disciple is male. Unless you're gonna tell me that's a cover-up that can't be proven. *sigh*
Onto that next and final point ....
POINT 4: MARY MAGDALENE'S SPECIAL ROLE
... is not being Jesus's wife. And that is a Good Thing.
I recently scanned through Goodreads reviews of The Madonna Secret by Sophie Strand because, hey, it has a high rating, and I was curious how it handled Jesus and Mary's rela---
It's smut. Smut and wonky characterization as reincarnations of gods/gendered cosmic forces. Ok.
I came across a reviewer who has studied Mary Magdalene as her academic passion, and she eviscerated the book's take on MM, Jesus, the disciples, and other women like Mother Mary and the prophetess Anna. And the review captures an important idea:
All this serves to say that the Magdalene had, and continues to have, a place in Christian discourses as an icon and a woman who speaks and cannot be silent, and by her speech helps found and establish the Church. She is not defined by her wifehood or lack thereof, or by being a mother or not. She’s named more in the gospel texts than some of the male apostles. The Magdalene is central to the Christian narrative even without the Gnostic texts that further foreground her. She’s a disciple in her own right, and an apostle unto the twelve apostles. It’s pretty cool. (Check out the original review here)
There's a LOT more in that review, but this gets across what I feel we should appreciate about Mary Magdalene. She does not need to be romantically linked to Jesus to have value, and to insist she must be undercuts her actual role.
THIS is the big thing that puts a bad taste in my mouth. It's why I cannot enjoy the ship just for funsies. Too much stock has been put into the idea of Mary Magdalene needing to be Jesus's feminine counterpart (pretty sure Mother Mary has that covered for Catholics). Mary Magdalene is the feminine counterpart to Peter and John. Heck, she supersedes them in a way as the Apostle to the Apostles.
Peter is the Rock. John is the Beloved. Mary Magdalene is the Messenger.
The Leader. The Heart. The Voice. United in the Body of Christ. That's pretty cool.
(Thanks for coming to my tedtalk. Have some Mary Mags from The Chosen as a treat.)
what if instead of voting for a new pope they made a tv show called pope race where the cardinals have to do challenges and runways to become the next pope superstar
I'm not really in the Christian fandom, but I do ship saint Cecilia with her guardian angel. Peak sapphic power-couple. Also, the legends are way better than the canon.
Honestly Jesus is pretty problematic for queerbating when his fanbase is so openly homophobic... Smh... He has a huge platform and won't even speak on it...
